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06-15-2006, 09:06 AM
The Dry Drunk Syndrome
Sobriety will necessarily have its ups and downs, its good times and its bad
times, if only because we live in a world which we are inseparably joined.
One doesn't always sustain sobriety at the same level. There are
fluctuations, shocks and setbacks which, when addressed within the context
of the A.A. program, so not in themselves imperil the totality of one's
sobriety. The Dry Drunk Syndrome is a term that should not be used as a
catch-all when one has a bad day or a bump in life throws us for a while.
Those are ups and downs that everyone experiences and shouldn't be labeled
to be anything more than what they truly are. The Dry Drunk is a condition
far more serious than the highs and lows of our day-to-day existence. The
phrase "dry drunk" has two significant words for the alcoholic. "Dry"
refers to the abstinence from drinking, whereas "drunk" signifies a deeply
pathological condition resulting from the use of alcohol in the past. Taken
together these words suggest intoxication without alcohol. Since
intoxication comes from the Greek word for poison, "dry drunk" implies a
state of mind and a mode of behavior that are poisonous to the alcoholic's
well being.
OBVIOUS TRAITS
Persons experiencing a full-blown DRY DRUNK are, for that period, removed
from the world of sobriety; they fail, for whatever reason, to accept the
necessary conditions for sober living. Their mental and emotional homes are
chaotic, their approach to everyday living is unrealistic, and their
behavior, both verbal and physical, is unacceptable. This lack of sober
realism manifests itself in many ways.
1. Grandiosity, put very simply, is an exaggeration of one's own
importance. This can be demonstrated either in terms of one's strengths or
weaknesses. In either case it is blatantly self-seeking or self-serving,
putting oneself at the center of attention, from the "big me" who has asked
the answers to the "poor me" whose cup of self-pity runneth over and wants
all of our attention.
2. Judgmentalism is mutually related to grandiosity. It means that the
alcoholic is prone to make value judgments - strikingly inappropriate
evaluations - usually in terms of "goodness" or "badness".
3. Intolerance leaves no room for delaying the gratification of personal
desires. This is accomplished by gross confusion of priorities with the
result that a mere whim or passing fancy is mistakenly given more importance
than genuine personal needs.
4. Impulsivity is the result of intolerance or the lack of ability to
delay gratification of personal desires. Impulsivity describes behavior
which is heedless of the ultimate consequence for self or others.
5. Indecisiveness is related to impulsitivity in the sense that while the
latter takes no realistic account of the consequences of the actions, the
former precludes effective action altogether. Indecisiveness stems from an
unrealistic exaggeration of the negative possibilities of the action; so one
wavers between two or more possible courses of action, more times than not -
nothing gets done.
These conditions, grandiosity, judgmentalism, intolerance, impulsivity, and
indecisiveness taken separately or together can lead to the following: a)
Mood swings, which are unrelated to the circumstances to which one tries to
link them. Alcoholics zero in on "what they want others to think" is the
cause of the mood swing, when it isn't that at all. More often than not it
is something much deeper than the reason given. Inversely it can also be
something totally insignificant with no substance at all (e.g. the sugar is
too sweet or the donut is too round). Any excuse will do. b) Unable to
demonstrate emotions freely, naturally and without constraint. No emotional
spontaneity, no genuine spark. c) Introspection. A very healthy thing to do
is difficult if not impossible for the "dry drunk". It means to look inward
to one's examining each thought and desire, which is linked directly to one's
attitude. d) Detachment. Become aloof, display indifference, don't care one
way or the other, no special likes or dislikes, they withdraw. e)
Self-absorption, with a tendency to call attention to whatever they have
attained. Narcissism which is quite simply unhealthy self-love. They become
pompous jerks. f) The inability to appreciate or enjoy themselves - nothing
satisfies. g) Evidence of disorganization, is easily distracted, complains
of boredom, and nothing seems to fit. h) A nostalgia sets in, a kind of
wistful yearning for something of the past, such as freedom from care
associated (falsely) with drinking, bars, drinking associates, and friends;
the music, blue lights, and tinkle of the ice cubes in a glass in the
neighborhood saloon. i) There can be a kind of romanticism, which includes
unrealistic valuations of lifestyles and character traits which can be and
usually are objectively dangerous to one's sobriety. j) Escapism.
Fantasizing, daydreaming, and wishful thinking are very much in evidence in
the dry drunk syndrome as the individual slips farther and farther from
reality.
Since the abnormality of the alcoholic's attitudes and behavior during the
drinking career is generally recognized, the persistence or these character
traits after stopping drinking (or the reappearance after an interlude of
sobriety) is equally abnormal. The term "dry drunk" therefore denotes the
absences of favorable change in the attitudes and behavior of the alcoholic
who is not drinking, or the reversion of these by the alcoholic who has
experienced a period of successful sobriety. From these conditions, it is
to be inferred that the alcoholic is experiencing discomfort in life.
The self-destructive attitudes and behavior of the dry drunk alcoholic are
different in degree but not in kind. The alcoholic, when drinking, has
learned to rely on a deeply inadequate, radically immature approach to
solving life's problems. And this is exactly what one sees in the dry
drunk.
ANALYSIS OF DRY DRUNK BEHAVIOR
The alcoholic who rationalizes their own irresponsible behavior are also
likely to find fault in the attitudes and behavior of others. Although not
denying their own shortcomings, they attempt to escape notice by cataloging
in great detail the transgressions of others.
The classic maneuver of the dry drunk is over-reaction. The alcoholic may
attach a seemingly disproportionate intensity of feeling to an ordinary
insignificant event or mishap.
Some alcoholics who experience the dry drunk seem to know all the answers,
are seldom at a loss for words when it comes to self-diagnosis. Their
knowledge is quite impressive, their apparent insight, as opposed to genuine
insight, is convincing.
CORRECTIVE MEASURES
Those undergoing a dry drunk lead impoverished lives. They experience severe
limitations to grow, to mature, and benefit from the possibilities that life
offers. They lack the freshness and spontaneity that genuinely sober
alcoholics manifest. Their life is a closed system, attitudes and behaviors
are stereotyped, repetitive, and consequently predictable.
Alcoholics learn early that humility and a power greater than themselves are
the bedrock for a genuine and productive sobriety. An unusual measure of
self-discipline must accompany the ego deflation process. Needed is
self-discipline in honesty, patience and responsibility towards the recovery
process and acceptance of the fullness of their disease. To improve long
term goals of sobriety be aware of mental stressors, get more involved in
the recovery program, get active in the 12 steps, get and use a sponsor,
talk things out. Hopefully, they will begin to appreciate the ironic folly
of those alcoholics who think life has suddenly become manageable again;
whose sanity is beyond question; who see no need of turning their lives over
to a Power greater then themselves; who find personal inventories
unnecessary since they are seldom in the wrong and are no longer subject to
the embarrassing need of repairing the wrongs they have done.
When dry drunk alcoholics awaken to this irony that they, still
unmanageable, still powerless, "are the ones who have made this remarkable
recovery," they may feel sufficiently mortified enough to want to change.
The Minnesota Recovery Page
More on the Dry Drunk Syndrome:
Dry Drunk Syndrome
http://www.cyberrecovery.net/drydrunk.html
Sobriety will necessarily have its ups and downs, its good times and its bad
times, if only because we live in a world which we are inseparably joined.
One doesn't always sustain sobriety at the same level. There are
fluctuations, shocks and setbacks which, when addressed within the context
of the A.A. program, so not in themselves imperil the totality of one's
sobriety. The Dry Drunk Syndrome is a term that should not be used as a
catch-all when one has a bad day or a bump in life throws us for a while.
Those are ups and downs that everyone experiences and shouldn't be labeled
to be anything more than what they truly are. The Dry Drunk is a condition
far more serious than the highs and lows of our day-to-day existence. The
phrase "dry drunk" has two significant words for the alcoholic. "Dry"
refers to the abstinence from drinking, whereas "drunk" signifies a deeply
pathological condition resulting from the use of alcohol in the past. Taken
together these words suggest intoxication without alcohol. Since
intoxication comes from the Greek word for poison, "dry drunk" implies a
state of mind and a mode of behavior that are poisonous to the alcoholic's
well being.
OBVIOUS TRAITS
Persons experiencing a full-blown DRY DRUNK are, for that period, removed
from the world of sobriety; they fail, for whatever reason, to accept the
necessary conditions for sober living. Their mental and emotional homes are
chaotic, their approach to everyday living is unrealistic, and their
behavior, both verbal and physical, is unacceptable. This lack of sober
realism manifests itself in many ways.
1. Grandiosity, put very simply, is an exaggeration of one's own
importance. This can be demonstrated either in terms of one's strengths or
weaknesses. In either case it is blatantly self-seeking or self-serving,
putting oneself at the center of attention, from the "big me" who has asked
the answers to the "poor me" whose cup of self-pity runneth over and wants
all of our attention.
2. Judgmentalism is mutually related to grandiosity. It means that the
alcoholic is prone to make value judgments - strikingly inappropriate
evaluations - usually in terms of "goodness" or "badness".
3. Intolerance leaves no room for delaying the gratification of personal
desires. This is accomplished by gross confusion of priorities with the
result that a mere whim or passing fancy is mistakenly given more importance
than genuine personal needs.
4. Impulsivity is the result of intolerance or the lack of ability to
delay gratification of personal desires. Impulsivity describes behavior
which is heedless of the ultimate consequence for self or others.
5. Indecisiveness is related to impulsitivity in the sense that while the
latter takes no realistic account of the consequences of the actions, the
former precludes effective action altogether. Indecisiveness stems from an
unrealistic exaggeration of the negative possibilities of the action; so one
wavers between two or more possible courses of action, more times than not -
nothing gets done.
These conditions, grandiosity, judgmentalism, intolerance, impulsivity, and
indecisiveness taken separately or together can lead to the following: a)
Mood swings, which are unrelated to the circumstances to which one tries to
link them. Alcoholics zero in on "what they want others to think" is the
cause of the mood swing, when it isn't that at all. More often than not it
is something much deeper than the reason given. Inversely it can also be
something totally insignificant with no substance at all (e.g. the sugar is
too sweet or the donut is too round). Any excuse will do. b) Unable to
demonstrate emotions freely, naturally and without constraint. No emotional
spontaneity, no genuine spark. c) Introspection. A very healthy thing to do
is difficult if not impossible for the "dry drunk". It means to look inward
to one's examining each thought and desire, which is linked directly to one's
attitude. d) Detachment. Become aloof, display indifference, don't care one
way or the other, no special likes or dislikes, they withdraw. e)
Self-absorption, with a tendency to call attention to whatever they have
attained. Narcissism which is quite simply unhealthy self-love. They become
pompous jerks. f) The inability to appreciate or enjoy themselves - nothing
satisfies. g) Evidence of disorganization, is easily distracted, complains
of boredom, and nothing seems to fit. h) A nostalgia sets in, a kind of
wistful yearning for something of the past, such as freedom from care
associated (falsely) with drinking, bars, drinking associates, and friends;
the music, blue lights, and tinkle of the ice cubes in a glass in the
neighborhood saloon. i) There can be a kind of romanticism, which includes
unrealistic valuations of lifestyles and character traits which can be and
usually are objectively dangerous to one's sobriety. j) Escapism.
Fantasizing, daydreaming, and wishful thinking are very much in evidence in
the dry drunk syndrome as the individual slips farther and farther from
reality.
Since the abnormality of the alcoholic's attitudes and behavior during the
drinking career is generally recognized, the persistence or these character
traits after stopping drinking (or the reappearance after an interlude of
sobriety) is equally abnormal. The term "dry drunk" therefore denotes the
absences of favorable change in the attitudes and behavior of the alcoholic
who is not drinking, or the reversion of these by the alcoholic who has
experienced a period of successful sobriety. From these conditions, it is
to be inferred that the alcoholic is experiencing discomfort in life.
The self-destructive attitudes and behavior of the dry drunk alcoholic are
different in degree but not in kind. The alcoholic, when drinking, has
learned to rely on a deeply inadequate, radically immature approach to
solving life's problems. And this is exactly what one sees in the dry
drunk.
ANALYSIS OF DRY DRUNK BEHAVIOR
The alcoholic who rationalizes their own irresponsible behavior are also
likely to find fault in the attitudes and behavior of others. Although not
denying their own shortcomings, they attempt to escape notice by cataloging
in great detail the transgressions of others.
The classic maneuver of the dry drunk is over-reaction. The alcoholic may
attach a seemingly disproportionate intensity of feeling to an ordinary
insignificant event or mishap.
Some alcoholics who experience the dry drunk seem to know all the answers,
are seldom at a loss for words when it comes to self-diagnosis. Their
knowledge is quite impressive, their apparent insight, as opposed to genuine
insight, is convincing.
CORRECTIVE MEASURES
Those undergoing a dry drunk lead impoverished lives. They experience severe
limitations to grow, to mature, and benefit from the possibilities that life
offers. They lack the freshness and spontaneity that genuinely sober
alcoholics manifest. Their life is a closed system, attitudes and behaviors
are stereotyped, repetitive, and consequently predictable.
Alcoholics learn early that humility and a power greater than themselves are
the bedrock for a genuine and productive sobriety. An unusual measure of
self-discipline must accompany the ego deflation process. Needed is
self-discipline in honesty, patience and responsibility towards the recovery
process and acceptance of the fullness of their disease. To improve long
term goals of sobriety be aware of mental stressors, get more involved in
the recovery program, get active in the 12 steps, get and use a sponsor,
talk things out. Hopefully, they will begin to appreciate the ironic folly
of those alcoholics who think life has suddenly become manageable again;
whose sanity is beyond question; who see no need of turning their lives over
to a Power greater then themselves; who find personal inventories
unnecessary since they are seldom in the wrong and are no longer subject to
the embarrassing need of repairing the wrongs they have done.
When dry drunk alcoholics awaken to this irony that they, still
unmanageable, still powerless, "are the ones who have made this remarkable
recovery," they may feel sufficiently mortified enough to want to change.
The Minnesota Recovery Page
More on the Dry Drunk Syndrome:
Dry Drunk Syndrome
http://www.cyberrecovery.net/drydrunk.html