Remembering your last drunk

[janbear]

Remembering your last drunk
That's not a typographical error. The word is "drunk," not "drink," as you'll see.

"A drink" is a term which has awakened pleasurable echoes and anticipations in millions of people for centuries.

Depending on our age, and on the circumstances which surrounded our first experiences with alcohol, we all have various memories and hopes (sometimes, anxieties) aroused by the thought of a cool beer, a bullshot, a gin and tonic, a boilermaker, a sip of wine, or whatever.

It is not difficult for a 55-year-old Finn, for example, when he hears someone suggest a drink, to recall the flush of warmth that a shot of vodka or aquavit brought on a cold day in his youth.

A searching, fearless look at our complete drinking record, however, shows that in the last years and months our drinking never created those perfect, magic moments again, no matter how often we tried for them.

Therefore, when the suggestion of "a drink" comes to us, we now try to remember the whole train of consequences of starting with just "a drink." We think the drink all the way through, down to our last miserable drunk and hangover.

Drinking for us no longer means music and gay laughter and flirtations. It means sickness and sorrow.

One A.A. member puts it this way: "I know now that stopping in for a drink will never again before me simply killing a few minutes and leaving a buck on the bar. In exchange for that drink, what I would plunk down now is my bank account, my family, our home, our car, my job, my sanity, and probably my life. It's too big a price, too big a risk."

He remembers his last drunk, not his first drink.


Do you remember your last drunk?

[janbear]

I do remember my last drunk and more importantly i feel is that i remember all the feelings that went along with. Not just the physical part of it, but the emotional, i felt as if i had been through the wringer. Those 4 horsemen i had know well and through a relapse in 1996 i reintroduced myself to them because i thought i needed more. I ended up in the hospital overnight and ran back to the rooms of recovery soon after. I can easily play the whole thing in my mind again. I am grateful that i dont have to go back unless i want to and today i dont want to. Thanks for letting me share and keeping it green in my mind of how it could be if i dont maintain my spirituality on a daily basis.

[craig]

janbear, "If u don't remember your last drunk,u have not had your last drunk! Craig

[snugsnug]

I am an addict so I am referring to using dope. I remember the last time like it was this morning. I was in a house with no power or water. We had the doors locked and had been shooting dope for several days. My arms were like pin cushions. My left arm the one I used most of the time was swelling up, so bad I could not hit a vein. I was pissed. I went to the ER and they admitted me. My arm was twice the normal size. I did not even realize that I had a fever of over a hundred and three, I was sick. It took several days for them to figure out what to do. I almost lost my arm, thank God I did not. I stayed in the surgery ward for seventeen days, they transfered me to the psychiatric ward for another five to withdraw. That was the last time I used.
Sterling

[admin]

I remember my last drunk - it almost killed me literally. It put me in the hospital with convulsions. I asked God while I was in there to not let me forget what happened. That is where and when I finally surrendered all to Lord Jesus. I had had enough. I haven't had a drink since. Praise God. :195:

[janbear]

"If u don't remember your last drunk,u have not had your last drunk! Craig Yes, Craig i have heard that in the rooms of recovery and totally agree. Thank God i still remember it all.
"That which you forget, you are doomed to repeat"

[craig]

Thanks about remembering my last drunk. I had forgotten my last debacles and fiasco until I read of the phrase "the four horsemen-Terror,Bewilderment,Frustration,Despair". (Big Book- chapter 11 page 151). Oftentimes I have forgotten that my booze addiction in the last several months took me to a physical stage. I call it my Casper, the non-friendly ghost,stage. I was living in the most seedy low life run down hotel in which most of the tenants were from the state hospital. I was unable to stop my body from walking to the package store and buying a case of beer every morning. Get wasted,possibly stumble to the soup kitchen next door,crash and finish it later. Only to have constant hangovers and do it all over again! It is the first drink ,with my higher power's help,that I must stay away from. Grateful for today's sober life. Craig

[maria r]

oh.....makes me want to cry, not for me, but for all of us, and those still suffering
thanks for these posts

[clean42day]

One A.A. member puts it this way: "I know now that stopping in for a drink will never again before me simply killing a few minutes and leaving a buck on the bar. In exchange for that drink, what I would plunk down now is my bank account, my family, our home, our car, my job, my sanity, and probably my life. It's too big a price, too big a risk."

He remembers his last drunk, not his first drink.

For me in exchange for the hit of cocaine I now plunk down my very soul, and the bank account, family, home, car, job, sanity and my life matters very little. yeah and physically I break out in handcuffs. so for me to use is to smoke my soul away.

I never want to do that again or live like that again and through this program and the grace of God - I won't have to.

light and love

Gail

[Chaz]

This topic is worthy of reviving after a couple of weeks making way down the page!

Do I remember my last drunk? Ohhhhhh ya!

It involved a lot of lying, sneaking around, impaired driving, dangerous drug deals, dangerous people, and humiliating behaviour. Followed up by a law suit by my xw! And a $*3& -load of money wasted!

Frankly, I can hardly remember the fun of it. I do remember the last bottle of booze I bought and where.... and my last deal and where.

Just glad I had this program to turn back to.... glad the last drunk is in the rear view mirror.

I will take sobriety, recovery, the program, and all of the benefits of recovery any day! (but only a day at a time).

Ciao.

Chaz

[celticgrey]

I remember my last drunk as well as I remember my first drink. The feelings and emotions make goosebumps run up and down my back. I have had occasion to play my thinking through since last sobering up last time and I am grateful I can remember my last drunk. Or what there is to remember and what I can piece together of a 7 day blackout travelng drunk that put me on life support for two days. I often embrace that memory because it was the start of a whole new life for me.

[free2bunme]

Yes. Completely manic behavior. Schizophrenic symptomology. ugh, shudder shudder.