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Ed C.
08-25-2007, 01:20 PM
Step 1. “We admitted we were powerless over alcohol - that our lives had become unmanageable.” “Alcoholics Anonymous” fourth edition “How It Works” pg. 59



Let me tell you about powerlessness! The mind can play some mighty mean tricks on some people. It certainly did for me. What happened is I listened to certain criticisms when I was young and started to believe they were true.

Of course I was told I was able to become anyone or anything I wanted to be while growing up, but **** it, it took a certain amount of work to achieve the goals that needed to be set to become successful at whatever I wanted. So when I went to achieve these goals I found failure and criticism from those people who were close to me.

Now don't get me wrong! I was able to achieve some lofty goals as a youngster, and I was encouraged to compete to become the best at whatever I was doing. I just never found myself to be really the best at anything. There was always someone who was bigger, stronger, smarter, and the list can go on forever if I wanted, but you get the idea.

The problem happened when I found drugs and alcohol. When I thought myself a failure at something, I now had an excuse to blame my failures on. When these things became an addiction, then it just was easier and softer to get blasted and not set any goals. It was very hard to fail at something if I didn't try it.

Oh let's not get the wrong impression about this now. I did set daily goals on how and when I was going to get drunk and high. I was very good at finding ways to achieve those goals too! I became manipulative in trying to gather the things that would make my daily goals a success. There was nothing that was spared. Money, time, people, or anything else was going to stand in front of the goals of doing what made me feel so good!

Sounds a little bit screwed up? Doesn't it? I was setting goals on achieving something that made no sense. I was not getting anywhere in life other than my health and wealth were at jeopardy on a daily basis. This became so routine that it became a very bad habit. The habit became so strong that when it came time to stop all of this non-sense I just couldn't. Believe me I tried, but it just didn't happen on my own! So I became powerless over my situation!

This went on for years after the recognition of a problem. I finally had to get my head out of my ass and realize that I couldn't do it on my own. I had to have help. I had to start doing something I wasn't used to doing. That was listening to other people and my conscience.

Other people started telling me that the help I needed wasn't going to come from a humanly source. It was going to have to come in the form of a spiritual experience. This is where the power existed that would catapult me to the place I needed to be to overcome the bad habits I had created.

The only training I ever had in my life pertaining to spirituality had to do with God and religion. Being I had no place in my heart for religion, I had to face God on my own. I looked for Him and found Him in my conscience. People think I'm crazy when I say that I have actual conversations with God through my conscience, but it was by listening very closely to the voice from with-in that gave me the power to start listening to common sense. It actually gave me a certain amount of common sense.

That was the power I needed to overcome the powerlessness I had when it came to alcohol, drugs, and cigarettes. It also gave me the power to make a lot better choices when it came to my life. I went from being wreck of a human being to a very successful one. Don't get me wrong! I'm not rich! Being successful doesn't mean that any way. Being successful is being able to set obtainable goals and successfully achieving them. With Love and respect, Ed C.

fibiray
08-26-2007, 07:25 AM
I know that feeling of powerlessness only too well as I am powerless over many things in my life. When it came to alcohol though I had become such a horrid person when I drank that any person would have considered giving it away. But not me, I picked up a drink time and time again knowing full well that I would become abusive, hostile, agressive and anti-social and yet I seemed powerless over this because I had to drink. I never related these things to alcohol and had always reasoned and rationalised these things. If he hadnt done this, or had not said this, or if my circumstances were different, but never did I look at alcohol. I was at a meeting tonight and a woman shared on how she would find ways to drink and even though she knew that a lot of her behaviour stemmed from alcohol she tried to find ways to drink and not have the anit-social behaviour. I can relate to this but for me I simply didn't want to drink, I wanted to simply be totally wasted without the hangovers and the drama that went along with it. Always all or nothing with me. thanks for letting me share.

Fi
:29:

david monteith
01-05-2008, 02:01 AM
hello my name is david and i am an alcoholic
i really loved this last share.
there was a part in it where you said, there was always some one bigger,stronger,smarter. that took me straight back to my childhood.
the second part of step one, that our lives had become unmanageable.
this part led me to acoa. i have spent the last few years looking at that part of my life.what you said Ed C. just triggered something inside me, there was always some-one bigger or smarter and perhaps i was always jealous or angry at that. hence the chip on my shoulder, the un-dealt with anger which surfaced long after my sobriety,the sarcasm all of those faults,the obsession
with getting even,showing them all up,it has almost bestroyed me.
thank you for this meeting Ed.
DavidM

Ed C.
01-05-2008, 12:46 PM
Hi David,

I don't know, but it seems to me that God works His magic in so many different ways. It has been some time since I've even visited this site, but today I went to look at my e-mails and there was a message that you had posted about this subject.

See David I talk to God about these things every day. I sit quietly and ask for His guidance on certain issues. I am constantly reminded on how powerless I am over anything else but what I do.

If I choose to be angry over things I have absolutely no control over, then it seems to me that I am only hurting my own self. If I visit those old issues and feel something that bothers me about them today, it is just plain ludicrous.

Reality is right here and right now. That's it! I can't live in the past, nor can I live in the future. The only way I can function with any type of effectiveness is by keeping my mind in the now. So all that stuff that made me powerless over everything and made my life so unmanageable was due to not living in the now.

What's real? Is it what is happening in our heads? Or is it what going on around us? Should we react to what's happening around us in a negative or a positive way? Are the things that bother us real, or are they only imagined? Do we even know if we are hurting ourselves with the thinking we are doing. These are questions that I ask all the time, let me know what you think. Thanks, Ed C.

DryDaveC
01-13-2008, 07:00 PM
Thank you for your post, Ed. I have felt that wau a good part of my life. I was even at the point of talking with God inside me before, but never shared it with anyone because I too felt like they would think I was nuts, and not only that, they would/could never understand, unless they are in the same position as me. But theres no substitiute for that serenity and a faith that really works when everything else fails.
My dilemma at times is dry drunk syndrome (syndrome being a name doctors give something when they have no other name for something), and I start rolling back into my old ideas and behaviors. I am coming back from a 17 year dry binge, wanted God back in my life again but had no idea how to. My program was weak at best, and my view of powerlessness had changed to self sufficiency. I hated it and hated the self centeredness and fear, but kept on and on. My wife and two kids finally left me because I had become a rageaholic also. I couldnt manage my life so a raged about every minor little excuse to get angry. Quite insane. I can feel my program beginning to work and the fear is lifting. I give people rides to meetings, bring up things at the meetings I never did before that got left unsaid and I try to remember to pray every day. So far, I am noticing a change. Its only been two weeks since my committment, but its a start and something to hold on to. At least I dont loathe myself today, nor wallow in self pity and I am not petrified of work or people and I am not quite so resentful also.
And all for a few simple hours a week at the tables of AA. Loads to be grateful for today.:92: