How was it for you doing the 4th and 5th steps?

[admin]

How was it for you doing the 4th and 5th steps? How did you feel beforehand, during and after? How did you do the 4th step? Did you use worksheets, just answer the questions in the Big Book/12 x 12, etc? When you did the 5th step, did you do it with your sponsor, a priest, someone else, etc?

[Montauktammy]

I have done my 4 & 5 th step 2 times with 2 different sponsors and now starting it again with my 3rd sponsor. Well the 1rst time it was kind of a release and yes I did it with my sponsor almost felt like I opened up the closet and let all those ghost go that where keeping me from moving forward in my life( keeping me stuck on stupid) the 2end time it was cleaning out the wounds so they could heal and I did that one with my sponsor too just a new sponsor. This one I had not worked my steps for 3 years and had become complacent in my recovery and almost went out so I am not sure how it is going to feel trying not to put to much on it. I can pick up some fears and well that’s not good. My first sponsor told me that she did not do her 5th step with her sponsor, she went down to the beach found a man walking on the beach that she did not know and did it with him. So what ever works for you.
with love Tammy

[Carol87]

The fourth and fifth steps were extremely painful for me … for three years I had sat in many many meetings without sharing … the easy way out was to go to speaker meetings so I didn’t have to share … NO WAY was I going to share my life with you or anyone else for that matter … it was absolutely none of your business … that’s how my sick alcoholic brain was working at that point. Finally I got a sponsor who not only suggested, but demanded, that I do a fourth step … I can’t tell you the fear that encompassed nor can I tell you how I rebelled against doing it … even with mega suggestions, etc. I just couldn’t crystallize a plan in my mind … probably because I didn’t think I belonged in AA to begin with … but finally I just got pen and paper and started writing (BTW - the pen just went on and on and ....). My method isn’t the best nor one I really recommend ... but it worked for me at the time … I simply did a biography of my life, my angers, my resentments, etc. I shared it with my sponsor who surprised the heck out of me by relating to almost everything I said! Today I have done many many mini fourth steps using the format in the big book … which has been far more rewarding.