4me2B
02-09-2008, 12:57 PM
:lol: Little Chris has worn glasses since the age of three. When he was in the first grade he came home one day very distressed. Wanting to find out what was the matter, his mom asked, "Chris, what happened today to upset you so much?"
He answered, "It's not fair -- I'm not allowed to go to the library."
His mother became very concerned and asked, "Why aren't you allowed to go to the library?"
With a tearful reply he said, "Because, in order to go to the library you have to have supervision, and I wear glasses!"
This story made me smile, but then it struck a cord in me in that recovery has the same purpose in my life as what Chris's mom has in his life, & sometimes I'm also just in grade 1. How often don't we misunderstand everyday-issues, which then stir up emotions & cause us to react impulsively in stead of responding in a calculated, balanced manner? Sometimes our impulsive reactions are not harmful (like when I found this story humorous & smiled); recovery gives me a deeper understanding to now respond more often, like sharing with you this simple message I got from this story:
1. I don't just need the SUPERVISION & guidance & teachings of the fellows in recovery & of my Higher Power, but my life depends on it as it's unmanageable & causes chaos so quickly! Just like with Chris, something needs to keep me on the road. They taught me to be teachable & accepting guidance are some of the characteristics of someone who is HUMBLE ..... & before I confusingly thought I couldn't dare to be humble as I'm not anyone's doormat.
2. Chris was crying because he felt they discriminated against him for not having SUPER VISION. He was probably referring to the fact that he is different from most others by having to wear glasses ..... not bad, just different; the same with my alcoholism & addiction & Bi-polar & PTSD. Don't we all (especially us alcoholics / addicts!) know how easy it is to discriminate, & the fear of being discriminated against? I remember clearly the insanity that I had to proof I could drink like anyone else as I didn't want to be different from every one else nor labeled as "different"; & yet still had the audacity to say things like "well, I'm not getting as drunk & out of hand like him or her"; and then even looked down onto that person.
3. For Chris, "super vision" (2 words, as he interpreted & understood what was said) probably meant to "see without glasses". For me (like for most of us as adults), SUPER VISION would be the ability to see the things I normally can not see with the naked eye ..... like seeing into the future. As the uncertainty of the future used to cause a lot of fear in me like for most, we're all for ever moaning because we don't know what the future holds for us. Every day I need to remind myself to life "JUST FOR TODAY" .... live in the moment, & God will look after tomorrow & the days to come on condition I HAVE FAITH TO BELIEVE THAT HE WILL do so.
So, metaphorically speaking, on the script for my "super vision glasses" are the words "Humbly Surrender for Faith". Now in recovery I can honestly no longer agree with the statement that "seeing is believing" as (for example) I don't need to believe that I have a right arm as I can see it, & that's enough proof. If we had enough proof & security in only material things, why did we need faith in anyone or anything? Then there was no purpose for (the existence of) any Higher Power, & would have been obsolete. "Believing is seeing" sounds more like wisdom (which is to see like God sees, I'm told).
There's just so much I still need to learn, because the more I know, the more I realize how little KNOWLEDGE & WISDOM I actually have.
Love you all
:42:
He answered, "It's not fair -- I'm not allowed to go to the library."
His mother became very concerned and asked, "Why aren't you allowed to go to the library?"
With a tearful reply he said, "Because, in order to go to the library you have to have supervision, and I wear glasses!"
This story made me smile, but then it struck a cord in me in that recovery has the same purpose in my life as what Chris's mom has in his life, & sometimes I'm also just in grade 1. How often don't we misunderstand everyday-issues, which then stir up emotions & cause us to react impulsively in stead of responding in a calculated, balanced manner? Sometimes our impulsive reactions are not harmful (like when I found this story humorous & smiled); recovery gives me a deeper understanding to now respond more often, like sharing with you this simple message I got from this story:
1. I don't just need the SUPERVISION & guidance & teachings of the fellows in recovery & of my Higher Power, but my life depends on it as it's unmanageable & causes chaos so quickly! Just like with Chris, something needs to keep me on the road. They taught me to be teachable & accepting guidance are some of the characteristics of someone who is HUMBLE ..... & before I confusingly thought I couldn't dare to be humble as I'm not anyone's doormat.
2. Chris was crying because he felt they discriminated against him for not having SUPER VISION. He was probably referring to the fact that he is different from most others by having to wear glasses ..... not bad, just different; the same with my alcoholism & addiction & Bi-polar & PTSD. Don't we all (especially us alcoholics / addicts!) know how easy it is to discriminate, & the fear of being discriminated against? I remember clearly the insanity that I had to proof I could drink like anyone else as I didn't want to be different from every one else nor labeled as "different"; & yet still had the audacity to say things like "well, I'm not getting as drunk & out of hand like him or her"; and then even looked down onto that person.
3. For Chris, "super vision" (2 words, as he interpreted & understood what was said) probably meant to "see without glasses". For me (like for most of us as adults), SUPER VISION would be the ability to see the things I normally can not see with the naked eye ..... like seeing into the future. As the uncertainty of the future used to cause a lot of fear in me like for most, we're all for ever moaning because we don't know what the future holds for us. Every day I need to remind myself to life "JUST FOR TODAY" .... live in the moment, & God will look after tomorrow & the days to come on condition I HAVE FAITH TO BELIEVE THAT HE WILL do so.
So, metaphorically speaking, on the script for my "super vision glasses" are the words "Humbly Surrender for Faith". Now in recovery I can honestly no longer agree with the statement that "seeing is believing" as (for example) I don't need to believe that I have a right arm as I can see it, & that's enough proof. If we had enough proof & security in only material things, why did we need faith in anyone or anything? Then there was no purpose for (the existence of) any Higher Power, & would have been obsolete. "Believing is seeing" sounds more like wisdom (which is to see like God sees, I'm told).
There's just so much I still need to learn, because the more I know, the more I realize how little KNOWLEDGE & WISDOM I actually have.
Love you all
:42: