REGRET ~

[janbear]

REGRET ~

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Regret is an appalling waste of energy;
you can't build on it;
it's only good for wallowing in.

Katherine Mansfield

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When I look back on my life before I came
into the program, I see how little of life I
really lived; how I allowed fear to rule my
life and stop me from trying new things;
how I was emotionally unavailable to my
children; how I literally stayed stuck in a
deep hole of self-pity and how I never
really heard beautiful music or gloried in
the miracles of nature. Although I had
what people might perceive as a pretty
normal life, my life was an empty shell
and I merely existed. I feel so saddened
now at the thought of all the wasted
years but I cannot bring them back. I
can only learn from them.

When I came into the program and read
the Promises in the Big Book of
Alcoholics Anonymous, I realized that
it was futile to regret the past or to shut
the door on it. Those years and all the
pain I went through are what made me
the person I am today. I need to always
remember where I came from, because
if I don't, I can just as easily go back there.
I can also use my experience to help
others on this wonderful road to recovery.
I am able to give away what has been
given to me so freely, because it's only
then that I can keep what I have.

ONE DAY AT A TIME ...
I must always remember where I came from
so that I help others in this program of
recovery, and also keep myself from going back.

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