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09-25-2008, 01:27 AM
Wisdom for Today
When I was active in my addiction, my thinking was all messed up. Drinking and using seemed normal to me. I was capable of rationalizing and defending all my behaviors and decisions. When I entered the program, I had to learn a new way of thinking. I had to learn how to think straight. I had to learn how to look at life differently. This was not something I did on my own. I needed help from others. I needed to learn the “Wisdom to know the difference.”
Wisdom was not something I had a lot of early on in recovery. I needed to rely on others in the program to give me feedback and suggestions. I had to learn that to do that which was healthy for me was the wise thing to do. Still today I need help sometimes to sort out what is healthy and wise for me. I thank God for the program and the people who have helped me along the way. Am I doing what is wise for me to do each day? Am I developing clean and sober thinking?
Meditations for the Heart
Sometimes I find that my day seems to be too busy. I have too much going on. I can even get overwhelmed. My sponsor used to remind me to breathe. It was his way of saying, “Slow down; easy does it.” It was his way of reminding me to walk through the day knowing that God would only give me what I could handle. It was his way of saying to me that God would give me what I needed to make it through the day. Do I have confidence that God will give me what I need to make it through each day, each situation, each breath?
Petitions to my Higher Power
God,
Today, my plate seems full, and there are a lot of things I need to do. Help me to walk through this day without fear or worry. Help me to be wise in my thinking. Lead me to the people that will help me along the way. Give me the courage to ask for help when I need it.
Amen.
-----
NA Just For Today
The Fourth Step - Fearing Our Feelings
"We may fear that being in touch with our feelings will trigger an overwhelming chain reaction of pain and panic."
Basic Text, p.29
A common complaint about the Fourth Step is that it makes us painfully conscious of our defects of character. We may be tempted to falter in our program of recovery. Through surrender and acceptance, we can find the resources we need to keep working the steps.
It's not the awareness of our defects that causes the most agony-it's the defects themselves. When we were using, all we felt was the drugs; we could ignore the suffering our defects were causing us. Now that the drugs are gone, we feel that pain. Refusing to acknowledge the source of our anguish doesn't make it go away; denial protects the pain and makes it stronger. The Twelve Steps help us deal with the misery caused by our defects by dealing directly with the defects themselves.
If we hurt from the pain of our defects, we can remind ourselves of the nightmare of addiction, a nightmare from which we've now awakened. We can recall the hope for release the Second Step gave us. We can again turn our will and our lives over, through the Third Step, to the care of the God of our understanding. Our Higher Power cares for us by giving us the help we need to work the rest of the Twelve Steps. We don't have to fear our feelings. Just for today, we can continue in our recovery.
Just for today: I won't be afraid of my feelings. With the help of my Higher Power, I'll continue in my recovery.
pg. 279
-----
September 25 - Daily Feast
Don't fret. When you can affect the outcome of something toward peace, do it. But stewing about those things you can't do anything about is wasted energy. Many of our problems would disappear if we did not keep them going with our fretting. We nag ourselves into despair and shoulder guilt that isn't ours. No doubt we have reason to be upset, but who doesn't. The ideal solution is to love and let go. The practical answer is to keep our mouths shut and let the knots unravel. They will.
~ They do not work underhanded at all, but declare plainly that they want peace. ~
SATANTA - KIOWA
'A Cherokee Feast of Days, Volume II' by Joyce Sequichie Hifler
*<<<=-=>>>*<<<=-=>>>*<<<=-=>>>*<<<=-=>>>*
Elder's Meditation of the Day - September 25
"Even the trees have spirits - everything has a spirit."
--Mary Hayes, CLAYOQUOT
The trees are great teachers. The trees are great listeners. That is why we should meditate in their presence. The Great spirit is in every rock, every animal, every human being and in every tree. The Great Spirit has been in some trees for hundreds of years. Therefore, the trees have witnessed and heard much. The trees are the Elders of the Elders. Their spirits are strong and very healing.
Great Spirit, teach me respect for all spiritual things.
*<<<=-=>>>*<<<=-=>>>*<<<=-=>>>*<<<=-=>>>*
"THINK on THESE THINGS"
By Joyce Sequichie Hifler
In every society there always seem to be people who feel it is their duty to read the riot act to whomever, in their opinion, is in need of it at the moment. Come be my friend until I have time to let you know the things you're doing wrong. This is a committee of one, in all my busy days.....taking time to straighten out all who are not conforming to my ideas.
Who, in all the world, has so much wisdom as to consider themselves so forever right.....to be capable of such certainty as to what another person should do. And even if they should be right, who commissioned them in all their wisdom to speak the words that have such power to wither a spirit.
When the world has so much hurt, why should one voice be raised against another who has not spoken an unkind word in its direction. When even the strongest is so in need of compassion and love, why is one voice, sharp edged and driven deep, allowed to speak.
Our words can build or destroy. And we never really know just when something we say may make a decision for someone else, to give them courage or further fear. But God help all who have not learned that the words we speak come back to us.....many times.
-----
Daily Relationship Reading
The stubbornness of a child is a wonder to behold at times. I may have run across a situation where a child was told he wouldn't be able to watch TV until he had picked up his toys. Instead of taking the few minutes that was needed to do so, he rebelled, and an hour later finally picked up the last toy before sitting in front of the TV.
I'll probably smile at such an example, but if I look at my own behavior, I might be surprised to find that I do the same kinds of things in our relationship at times. I get into a battle of wills, where I refuse to do something, until my partner takes care of something I want them to.
What does this accomplish for me? I might get the temporary satisfaction of having things my way for a bit, but at a much greater cost than I realize. I go around with a knot in my stomach and resentment touching everything I do. If my efforts don't succeed, I throw up my hands in despair because I went through so much turmoil in trying to get my way, and none of it worked anyway.
If instead, I simply did what I felt needed to be done and whatever else I wanted to do, I'd likely find that each day became filled with more and more good moments regardless of what my SO did, or didn't do.
Just for Today
Do my choices bring me a lot of turmoil when I wait for my partner to do something, before I act on something?
Today I'll think about how I let my feelings depend on what others do, or don't do. My happiness is too important to be left in the hands of someone else.
We reach the end of our rope quicker when it has a lot of nots. - BH
-----
You are reading from the book Food for Thought.
Don't Hang On
As long as we are alive, we will experience times of joy and times of sadness. Trying to hang on to the periods of elation and avoid the inevitable depression which each of us feels from time to time causes us to seek artificial stimulation. Using food to try to stay on cloud nine did not work, and neither does anything else.
By turning over our lives, we become willing to let go and move through the periods of joy and sadness as we come to them. Trying to hang on arrests our progress. Nothing is certain in this life except change, and when we stop overeating we are better able to deal with the variations in our feelings and circumstances.
Whatever our current mood or situation, we can remain abstinent. Abstinence gives our lives stability and order, in spite of changes. Being centered in the Power greater than ourselves keeps us from being overly affected by either elation or depression.
By focusing on You, may I move calmly through the times of joy and the times of sadness.
-----
You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Things don't turn up in this world until somebody turns them up. --James A. Garfield
We could learn from the bears in the woods how to turn up opportunities. To nourish themselves, they turn over logs and stumps to get insects. When they smell honey, they will climb a tree after it, and when they see berries they will move branches aside to get at them.
Like the bears, we need to turn up things for ourselves. Perhaps we can enter a drawing or writing contest. Maybe we can try out for a team sport or the orchestra. By doing this, we take risks, which foster our growth and build confidence, and we turn our lives into fulfilling adventures.
Why wait for opportunity to knock when we can knock at opportunity's door. Whatever our interests, finding ways to enjoy them can make the most out of the opportunities around us.
What opportunities are available to me today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Be thine own palace, or the world's thy jail. --John Donne
All of us have some difficult circumstances to face today. Some among us find ourselves in the hospital or in jail. Others are worried about pressures and frustrations at work. Tensions and concerns about war and the future of the world affect us all. We have many uncontrollable circumstances in our lives, but we don't have to give ourselves over to them. A man's body may be in jail while in his heart he is free.
We build a palace for our spirits by maintaining contact with our Higher Power. We are always within the circle of God's love. Always! Knowing that helps us make peace with the limits on what we can do about our situations. Then we can go forth working to make peace in our relationships, accomplish what is possible in our lives, and make a contribution to others.
Today, I will remember that the frustrations around me are not all of who I am. When I am at peace within, I live among spiritual riches.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
...we do not always like what is good for us in this world. --Eleanor Roosevelt
Most of us can look back and recall how we fought a particular change. How certain we were that we wouldn't survive the upheaval! Perhaps we lost a love or were forced to leave a home or a job. Retrospect allows us to see the good of the change, and we can see the necessary part each change has played in our development as recovering women. We've had to change to cover the distances we've traveled. And we'll have to continue changing.
The program and its structure, and our faith in that structure, can ease the harsh consequences of change. Our higher power wants only the best for us, of that we can be sure. However, the best may not always "fit" when first we try it. Patience, trust, and prayer are a winning combination when the time comes for us to accept a change. We'll know when it's coming. Our present circumstances will begin to pinch.
Change means growth. It's a time for celebration, not dread. It means I am ready to move ahead--that I have "passed" the current test.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Peace with the Past
Even God cannot change the past. --Agathon
Holding on to the past, either through guilt, longing, denial, or resentment, is a waste of valuable energy - energy that can be used to transform today and tomorrow.
"I used to live in my past," said one recovering woman. "I was either trying to change it, or I was letting it control me. Usually both.
"I constantly felt guilty about things that had happened. Things I had done; things others had done to me - even though I had made amends for most everything, the guilt ran deep. Everything was somehow my fault. I could never just let it go.
"I held on to anger for years, telling myself it was justified. I was in denial about a lot of things. Sometimes, I'd try to absolutely forget about my past, but I never really stopped and sorted through it; my past was like a dark cloud that followed me around, and I couldn't shake clear of it. I guess I was scared to let it go, afraid of today, afraid of tomorrow.
I've been recovering now for years, and it has taken me almost as many years to gain the proper perspective on my past. I'm learning I can't forget it; I need to heal from it. I need to feel and let go of any feelings I still have, especially anger.
"I need to stop blaming myself for painful events that took place, and trust that everything has happened on schedule, and truly all is okay. I've learned to stop regretting, and to start being grateful.
"When I think about the past, I thank God for the healing and the memory. If something occurs that needs an amend, I make it and am done with it. I've learned to look at my past with compassion for myself, trusting that my Higher Power was in control, even then.
"I've healed from some of the worst things that happened to me. I've made peace with myself about these issues, and I've learned that healing from some of these issues has enabled me to help others to heal too. I'm able to see how the worst things helped form my character and developed some of my finer points.
"I've even developed gratitude for my failed relationships because they have brought me to who and where I am today.
"What I've learned has been acceptance - without guilt, anger, blame, or shame. I've even had to learn to accept the years I spent feeling guilty, angry, shameful, and blaming."
We cannot control the past. But we can transform it by allowing ourselves to heal from it and by accepting it with love for others and ourselves. I know, because that woman is me.
Today, I will begin being grateful for my past. I cannot change what happened, but I can transform the past by owning my power, now, to accept, heal, and learn from it.
Today I choose to build a pathway to freedom from the bondage of self. --Ruth Fishel
God help me to stay sober and clean today!
-----
Each day a new beginning
You and yours only claim the events of your life to make yourself yours. ~ Florida Scott-Maxwell
~~ The search is on. Everyone, everywhere, asks the question at some time, "Who am I?" People like ourselves are fortunate to have this program. It shows us the way to self-discovery. It directs our steps to the celebration of self that is a gift of recovery. The events of our past may plague us. But they did contribute to the fullness we feel today. And for them, for their involvement in who we've become, we can be grateful.
Claiming ourselves, the good and the bad, is healing. It's taking responsibility... for where we were and where we're going. Claiming ourselves makes us the active participants in our lives. The choices are many and varied. Not actively participating in life is also a choice. Passivity may have been our dominant choice in years gone by. But now, today, we are choosing recovery. We are choosing action that is healing, and wholeness is the result.
.....Making myself mine will exhilarate me. It will give me hope. It will prepare me for anything to come. I will know a new joy.
When I was active in my addiction, my thinking was all messed up. Drinking and using seemed normal to me. I was capable of rationalizing and defending all my behaviors and decisions. When I entered the program, I had to learn a new way of thinking. I had to learn how to think straight. I had to learn how to look at life differently. This was not something I did on my own. I needed help from others. I needed to learn the “Wisdom to know the difference.”
Wisdom was not something I had a lot of early on in recovery. I needed to rely on others in the program to give me feedback and suggestions. I had to learn that to do that which was healthy for me was the wise thing to do. Still today I need help sometimes to sort out what is healthy and wise for me. I thank God for the program and the people who have helped me along the way. Am I doing what is wise for me to do each day? Am I developing clean and sober thinking?
Meditations for the Heart
Sometimes I find that my day seems to be too busy. I have too much going on. I can even get overwhelmed. My sponsor used to remind me to breathe. It was his way of saying, “Slow down; easy does it.” It was his way of reminding me to walk through the day knowing that God would only give me what I could handle. It was his way of saying to me that God would give me what I needed to make it through the day. Do I have confidence that God will give me what I need to make it through each day, each situation, each breath?
Petitions to my Higher Power
God,
Today, my plate seems full, and there are a lot of things I need to do. Help me to walk through this day without fear or worry. Help me to be wise in my thinking. Lead me to the people that will help me along the way. Give me the courage to ask for help when I need it.
Amen.
-----
NA Just For Today
The Fourth Step - Fearing Our Feelings
"We may fear that being in touch with our feelings will trigger an overwhelming chain reaction of pain and panic."
Basic Text, p.29
A common complaint about the Fourth Step is that it makes us painfully conscious of our defects of character. We may be tempted to falter in our program of recovery. Through surrender and acceptance, we can find the resources we need to keep working the steps.
It's not the awareness of our defects that causes the most agony-it's the defects themselves. When we were using, all we felt was the drugs; we could ignore the suffering our defects were causing us. Now that the drugs are gone, we feel that pain. Refusing to acknowledge the source of our anguish doesn't make it go away; denial protects the pain and makes it stronger. The Twelve Steps help us deal with the misery caused by our defects by dealing directly with the defects themselves.
If we hurt from the pain of our defects, we can remind ourselves of the nightmare of addiction, a nightmare from which we've now awakened. We can recall the hope for release the Second Step gave us. We can again turn our will and our lives over, through the Third Step, to the care of the God of our understanding. Our Higher Power cares for us by giving us the help we need to work the rest of the Twelve Steps. We don't have to fear our feelings. Just for today, we can continue in our recovery.
Just for today: I won't be afraid of my feelings. With the help of my Higher Power, I'll continue in my recovery.
pg. 279
-----
September 25 - Daily Feast
Don't fret. When you can affect the outcome of something toward peace, do it. But stewing about those things you can't do anything about is wasted energy. Many of our problems would disappear if we did not keep them going with our fretting. We nag ourselves into despair and shoulder guilt that isn't ours. No doubt we have reason to be upset, but who doesn't. The ideal solution is to love and let go. The practical answer is to keep our mouths shut and let the knots unravel. They will.
~ They do not work underhanded at all, but declare plainly that they want peace. ~
SATANTA - KIOWA
'A Cherokee Feast of Days, Volume II' by Joyce Sequichie Hifler
*<<<=-=>>>*<<<=-=>>>*<<<=-=>>>*<<<=-=>>>*
Elder's Meditation of the Day - September 25
"Even the trees have spirits - everything has a spirit."
--Mary Hayes, CLAYOQUOT
The trees are great teachers. The trees are great listeners. That is why we should meditate in their presence. The Great spirit is in every rock, every animal, every human being and in every tree. The Great Spirit has been in some trees for hundreds of years. Therefore, the trees have witnessed and heard much. The trees are the Elders of the Elders. Their spirits are strong and very healing.
Great Spirit, teach me respect for all spiritual things.
*<<<=-=>>>*<<<=-=>>>*<<<=-=>>>*<<<=-=>>>*
"THINK on THESE THINGS"
By Joyce Sequichie Hifler
In every society there always seem to be people who feel it is their duty to read the riot act to whomever, in their opinion, is in need of it at the moment. Come be my friend until I have time to let you know the things you're doing wrong. This is a committee of one, in all my busy days.....taking time to straighten out all who are not conforming to my ideas.
Who, in all the world, has so much wisdom as to consider themselves so forever right.....to be capable of such certainty as to what another person should do. And even if they should be right, who commissioned them in all their wisdom to speak the words that have such power to wither a spirit.
When the world has so much hurt, why should one voice be raised against another who has not spoken an unkind word in its direction. When even the strongest is so in need of compassion and love, why is one voice, sharp edged and driven deep, allowed to speak.
Our words can build or destroy. And we never really know just when something we say may make a decision for someone else, to give them courage or further fear. But God help all who have not learned that the words we speak come back to us.....many times.
-----
Daily Relationship Reading
The stubbornness of a child is a wonder to behold at times. I may have run across a situation where a child was told he wouldn't be able to watch TV until he had picked up his toys. Instead of taking the few minutes that was needed to do so, he rebelled, and an hour later finally picked up the last toy before sitting in front of the TV.
I'll probably smile at such an example, but if I look at my own behavior, I might be surprised to find that I do the same kinds of things in our relationship at times. I get into a battle of wills, where I refuse to do something, until my partner takes care of something I want them to.
What does this accomplish for me? I might get the temporary satisfaction of having things my way for a bit, but at a much greater cost than I realize. I go around with a knot in my stomach and resentment touching everything I do. If my efforts don't succeed, I throw up my hands in despair because I went through so much turmoil in trying to get my way, and none of it worked anyway.
If instead, I simply did what I felt needed to be done and whatever else I wanted to do, I'd likely find that each day became filled with more and more good moments regardless of what my SO did, or didn't do.
Just for Today
Do my choices bring me a lot of turmoil when I wait for my partner to do something, before I act on something?
Today I'll think about how I let my feelings depend on what others do, or don't do. My happiness is too important to be left in the hands of someone else.
We reach the end of our rope quicker when it has a lot of nots. - BH
-----
You are reading from the book Food for Thought.
Don't Hang On
As long as we are alive, we will experience times of joy and times of sadness. Trying to hang on to the periods of elation and avoid the inevitable depression which each of us feels from time to time causes us to seek artificial stimulation. Using food to try to stay on cloud nine did not work, and neither does anything else.
By turning over our lives, we become willing to let go and move through the periods of joy and sadness as we come to them. Trying to hang on arrests our progress. Nothing is certain in this life except change, and when we stop overeating we are better able to deal with the variations in our feelings and circumstances.
Whatever our current mood or situation, we can remain abstinent. Abstinence gives our lives stability and order, in spite of changes. Being centered in the Power greater than ourselves keeps us from being overly affected by either elation or depression.
By focusing on You, may I move calmly through the times of joy and the times of sadness.
-----
You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Things don't turn up in this world until somebody turns them up. --James A. Garfield
We could learn from the bears in the woods how to turn up opportunities. To nourish themselves, they turn over logs and stumps to get insects. When they smell honey, they will climb a tree after it, and when they see berries they will move branches aside to get at them.
Like the bears, we need to turn up things for ourselves. Perhaps we can enter a drawing or writing contest. Maybe we can try out for a team sport or the orchestra. By doing this, we take risks, which foster our growth and build confidence, and we turn our lives into fulfilling adventures.
Why wait for opportunity to knock when we can knock at opportunity's door. Whatever our interests, finding ways to enjoy them can make the most out of the opportunities around us.
What opportunities are available to me today?
You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Be thine own palace, or the world's thy jail. --John Donne
All of us have some difficult circumstances to face today. Some among us find ourselves in the hospital or in jail. Others are worried about pressures and frustrations at work. Tensions and concerns about war and the future of the world affect us all. We have many uncontrollable circumstances in our lives, but we don't have to give ourselves over to them. A man's body may be in jail while in his heart he is free.
We build a palace for our spirits by maintaining contact with our Higher Power. We are always within the circle of God's love. Always! Knowing that helps us make peace with the limits on what we can do about our situations. Then we can go forth working to make peace in our relationships, accomplish what is possible in our lives, and make a contribution to others.
Today, I will remember that the frustrations around me are not all of who I am. When I am at peace within, I live among spiritual riches.
You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
...we do not always like what is good for us in this world. --Eleanor Roosevelt
Most of us can look back and recall how we fought a particular change. How certain we were that we wouldn't survive the upheaval! Perhaps we lost a love or were forced to leave a home or a job. Retrospect allows us to see the good of the change, and we can see the necessary part each change has played in our development as recovering women. We've had to change to cover the distances we've traveled. And we'll have to continue changing.
The program and its structure, and our faith in that structure, can ease the harsh consequences of change. Our higher power wants only the best for us, of that we can be sure. However, the best may not always "fit" when first we try it. Patience, trust, and prayer are a winning combination when the time comes for us to accept a change. We'll know when it's coming. Our present circumstances will begin to pinch.
Change means growth. It's a time for celebration, not dread. It means I am ready to move ahead--that I have "passed" the current test.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Peace with the Past
Even God cannot change the past. --Agathon
Holding on to the past, either through guilt, longing, denial, or resentment, is a waste of valuable energy - energy that can be used to transform today and tomorrow.
"I used to live in my past," said one recovering woman. "I was either trying to change it, or I was letting it control me. Usually both.
"I constantly felt guilty about things that had happened. Things I had done; things others had done to me - even though I had made amends for most everything, the guilt ran deep. Everything was somehow my fault. I could never just let it go.
"I held on to anger for years, telling myself it was justified. I was in denial about a lot of things. Sometimes, I'd try to absolutely forget about my past, but I never really stopped and sorted through it; my past was like a dark cloud that followed me around, and I couldn't shake clear of it. I guess I was scared to let it go, afraid of today, afraid of tomorrow.
I've been recovering now for years, and it has taken me almost as many years to gain the proper perspective on my past. I'm learning I can't forget it; I need to heal from it. I need to feel and let go of any feelings I still have, especially anger.
"I need to stop blaming myself for painful events that took place, and trust that everything has happened on schedule, and truly all is okay. I've learned to stop regretting, and to start being grateful.
"When I think about the past, I thank God for the healing and the memory. If something occurs that needs an amend, I make it and am done with it. I've learned to look at my past with compassion for myself, trusting that my Higher Power was in control, even then.
"I've healed from some of the worst things that happened to me. I've made peace with myself about these issues, and I've learned that healing from some of these issues has enabled me to help others to heal too. I'm able to see how the worst things helped form my character and developed some of my finer points.
"I've even developed gratitude for my failed relationships because they have brought me to who and where I am today.
"What I've learned has been acceptance - without guilt, anger, blame, or shame. I've even had to learn to accept the years I spent feeling guilty, angry, shameful, and blaming."
We cannot control the past. But we can transform it by allowing ourselves to heal from it and by accepting it with love for others and ourselves. I know, because that woman is me.
Today, I will begin being grateful for my past. I cannot change what happened, but I can transform the past by owning my power, now, to accept, heal, and learn from it.
Today I choose to build a pathway to freedom from the bondage of self. --Ruth Fishel
God help me to stay sober and clean today!
-----
Each day a new beginning
You and yours only claim the events of your life to make yourself yours. ~ Florida Scott-Maxwell
~~ The search is on. Everyone, everywhere, asks the question at some time, "Who am I?" People like ourselves are fortunate to have this program. It shows us the way to self-discovery. It directs our steps to the celebration of self that is a gift of recovery. The events of our past may plague us. But they did contribute to the fullness we feel today. And for them, for their involvement in who we've become, we can be grateful.
Claiming ourselves, the good and the bad, is healing. It's taking responsibility... for where we were and where we're going. Claiming ourselves makes us the active participants in our lives. The choices are many and varied. Not actively participating in life is also a choice. Passivity may have been our dominant choice in years gone by. But now, today, we are choosing recovery. We are choosing action that is healing, and wholeness is the result.
.....Making myself mine will exhilarate me. It will give me hope. It will prepare me for anything to come. I will know a new joy.