janbear
11-22-2008, 11:36 PM
A Look At Relapse
1. EXHAUSTION -
Allowing yourself to become overly tired or in poor health. Some Alcoholics are also prone to work addictions - perhaps in a hurry to make up for lost time. Good health and enough rest are important. If you feel well you are more apt to think well. Feel poorly and your thinking is apt to deteriorate. Feel bad enough and you might begin thinking a drink couldn't make it any worse. Remember HALT Hungry Angry Lonely or Tired. In other words take care of yourself first.
2. DISHONESTY -
This begins with a pattern of unnecessary little lies and deceits with fellow workers, friends, and family. Then come important lies to yourself. This is called "rationalizing" - making excuses for not doing what you don't want to do, or for doing what you know you should not do. Key word being Unnecessary! Dishonesty is always a choice, and so is honesty…..but the inner spiritual cost of being dishonest is too high for 12 steppers. Take the risk to get real, and be honest……the reward is called integrity.
3. IMPATIENCE -
Things are not happening fast enough. Or, others are not doing what they should or what you want them to do. - Focus on your own efforts and apply life on life’s terms.
4. ARGUMENTATIVENESS -
Arguing small and ridiculous points of view indicates a need to always be right. "Why don't you be reasonable and agree with me?" Looking for an excuse to drink? - let go of the need to be right - instead DO what is right.
5. DEPRESSION -
Unreasonable and unaccountable despair may occur in cycles and should be dealt with - talked about, journaled, shared, and expressed. Reclaim your devotion to a spiritual relationship.
6. FRUSTRATION -
At people and also because things may not be going your way. Remember -- everything is not going to be just the way you want it to be.
7. SELF-PITY -
"Why do these things happen to me?" "Why must I be an alcoholic?" Nobody appreciates all I am doing - for them? There are worse things than being an alcoholic - you could be a dead alcoholic….get grateful…..your past is your greatest asset help someone else with your message.
8. COCKINESS -
Got it made - no longer fear alcoholism - going into drinking situations to prove to others you have no problem. Do this often enough and it will wear down your defenses. - A strategic enemy will befriend you……keep you close, and then when you least expect it….Wammy! Denial is the hallmark of this disease ! Stay aware !
9. COMPLACENCY -
"Drinking was the furthest thing from my mind." Not drinking was no longer a conscious thought, either. It is dangerous to let up on disciplines just because everything is going well. Always to have a little fear is a good thing. More relapses occur when things are going well than otherwise. Stay active and connected to recovery, sponsor, fellowship, and especially Higher power. Never forget the despair of your last drink.
10. EXPECTING TOO MUCH
FROM OTHERS -
"I've changed; why hasn't everyone else?" It's a plus if they do, but it is still your problem if they do not. They may not trust you yet, may still be looking for further proof. You cannot expect others to change their style of life just because you have. It is none of your business if they have changed or not. Continue to BE trustworthy . Somebody prayed for the change to happen in you…..so return the favor….and pray for them.
11. LETTING UP ON DISCIPLINES -
Prayer, meditation, daily inventory, AA attendance. This can stem either from complacency or boredom. You cannot afford to be bored with your program. The cost of relapse is always too great. Get a commitment you’ve never had before. And see what you can contribute to meetings….! I’m sure we could all find something in this list to work on.
12. USE OF MOOD-ALTERING CHEMICALS -
You may feel the need to ease things with a pill, and your doctor may go along with you. You may never have had a problem with chemicals other than alcohol, but you can easily lose sobriety starting this way - about the most subtle way of having a relapse. Remember you will be cheating! The reverse of this is true for drug-dependent persons who start to drink. Remember the obsession of the mind and the allergy of the body applies to all mood altering chemicals your brain does not differentiate….it reacts period.
13. WANTING TOO MUCH -
Do not set goals you cannot reach with normal effort. Do not expect too much. It's always great when good things you were not expecting
happen. You will get what you are entitled to as long as you do your best, but maybe not as soon as you think you should. "Happiness is not having what you want, but wanting what you
have."
14. FORGETTING GRATITUDE -
You may be looking negatively on your life, concentrating on problems that still are not totally corrected. Nobody wants to be a Pollyanna - but it is good to remember where
you started from, and how much better life is now.
15. "IT CAN'T HAPPEN TO ME" -
This is dangerous thinking. Almost anything can happen to you if you get careless. Remember you have a progressive disease, and you will be in worse shape if you relapse. Insanity is not doing the same thing over expecting different results…..it’s doing the same thing over and knowing exactly what the result will be….and then doing it anyway !
16. OMNIPOTENCE -
This is a feeling that results from a combination of many of the above. You now have all the answers for yourself and others. No one can tell you anything. You ignore suggestions or advice
from others. Relapse is probably imminent unless drastic changes takes place. You cannot think yourself out of a drink….and you cannot think yourself into recovery….you must take action. Remember there is a God and your not it.
1. EXHAUSTION -
Allowing yourself to become overly tired or in poor health. Some Alcoholics are also prone to work addictions - perhaps in a hurry to make up for lost time. Good health and enough rest are important. If you feel well you are more apt to think well. Feel poorly and your thinking is apt to deteriorate. Feel bad enough and you might begin thinking a drink couldn't make it any worse. Remember HALT Hungry Angry Lonely or Tired. In other words take care of yourself first.
2. DISHONESTY -
This begins with a pattern of unnecessary little lies and deceits with fellow workers, friends, and family. Then come important lies to yourself. This is called "rationalizing" - making excuses for not doing what you don't want to do, or for doing what you know you should not do. Key word being Unnecessary! Dishonesty is always a choice, and so is honesty…..but the inner spiritual cost of being dishonest is too high for 12 steppers. Take the risk to get real, and be honest……the reward is called integrity.
3. IMPATIENCE -
Things are not happening fast enough. Or, others are not doing what they should or what you want them to do. - Focus on your own efforts and apply life on life’s terms.
4. ARGUMENTATIVENESS -
Arguing small and ridiculous points of view indicates a need to always be right. "Why don't you be reasonable and agree with me?" Looking for an excuse to drink? - let go of the need to be right - instead DO what is right.
5. DEPRESSION -
Unreasonable and unaccountable despair may occur in cycles and should be dealt with - talked about, journaled, shared, and expressed. Reclaim your devotion to a spiritual relationship.
6. FRUSTRATION -
At people and also because things may not be going your way. Remember -- everything is not going to be just the way you want it to be.
7. SELF-PITY -
"Why do these things happen to me?" "Why must I be an alcoholic?" Nobody appreciates all I am doing - for them? There are worse things than being an alcoholic - you could be a dead alcoholic….get grateful…..your past is your greatest asset help someone else with your message.
8. COCKINESS -
Got it made - no longer fear alcoholism - going into drinking situations to prove to others you have no problem. Do this often enough and it will wear down your defenses. - A strategic enemy will befriend you……keep you close, and then when you least expect it….Wammy! Denial is the hallmark of this disease ! Stay aware !
9. COMPLACENCY -
"Drinking was the furthest thing from my mind." Not drinking was no longer a conscious thought, either. It is dangerous to let up on disciplines just because everything is going well. Always to have a little fear is a good thing. More relapses occur when things are going well than otherwise. Stay active and connected to recovery, sponsor, fellowship, and especially Higher power. Never forget the despair of your last drink.
10. EXPECTING TOO MUCH
FROM OTHERS -
"I've changed; why hasn't everyone else?" It's a plus if they do, but it is still your problem if they do not. They may not trust you yet, may still be looking for further proof. You cannot expect others to change their style of life just because you have. It is none of your business if they have changed or not. Continue to BE trustworthy . Somebody prayed for the change to happen in you…..so return the favor….and pray for them.
11. LETTING UP ON DISCIPLINES -
Prayer, meditation, daily inventory, AA attendance. This can stem either from complacency or boredom. You cannot afford to be bored with your program. The cost of relapse is always too great. Get a commitment you’ve never had before. And see what you can contribute to meetings….! I’m sure we could all find something in this list to work on.
12. USE OF MOOD-ALTERING CHEMICALS -
You may feel the need to ease things with a pill, and your doctor may go along with you. You may never have had a problem with chemicals other than alcohol, but you can easily lose sobriety starting this way - about the most subtle way of having a relapse. Remember you will be cheating! The reverse of this is true for drug-dependent persons who start to drink. Remember the obsession of the mind and the allergy of the body applies to all mood altering chemicals your brain does not differentiate….it reacts period.
13. WANTING TOO MUCH -
Do not set goals you cannot reach with normal effort. Do not expect too much. It's always great when good things you were not expecting
happen. You will get what you are entitled to as long as you do your best, but maybe not as soon as you think you should. "Happiness is not having what you want, but wanting what you
have."
14. FORGETTING GRATITUDE -
You may be looking negatively on your life, concentrating on problems that still are not totally corrected. Nobody wants to be a Pollyanna - but it is good to remember where
you started from, and how much better life is now.
15. "IT CAN'T HAPPEN TO ME" -
This is dangerous thinking. Almost anything can happen to you if you get careless. Remember you have a progressive disease, and you will be in worse shape if you relapse. Insanity is not doing the same thing over expecting different results…..it’s doing the same thing over and knowing exactly what the result will be….and then doing it anyway !
16. OMNIPOTENCE -
This is a feeling that results from a combination of many of the above. You now have all the answers for yourself and others. No one can tell you anything. You ignore suggestions or advice
from others. Relapse is probably imminent unless drastic changes takes place. You cannot think yourself out of a drink….and you cannot think yourself into recovery….you must take action. Remember there is a God and your not it.