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12-08-2008, 01:30 PM
NA Just For Today
December 9
Listening

"This ability to listen is a gift and grows as we grow spiritually. Life takes on a new meaning when we open ourselves to this gift."
Basic Text pg. 102

Have you ever watched two small children carry on a conversation? One will be talking about purple dragons while the other carries on about the discomfort caused by having sand in one's shoes. We sometimes encounter the same communication problems as we learn to listen to others. We may struggle through meetings, trying desperately to hear the person sharing while our minds are busy planning what we will say when it's our turn to speak. In conversation, we may suddenly realize that our answers have nothing to do with the questions we're being asked. They are, instead, speeches prepared while in the grip of our self-obsession.

Learning how to listen - really listen - is a difficult task, but one that's not beyond our reach. We might begin by acknowledging in our replies what our conversational partner is saying. We might ask if there is anything we can do to help when someone expresses a problem. With a little practice, we can find greater freedom from self-obsession and closer contact with the people in our lives.

Just for today: I will quiet my own thoughts and listen to what someone else is saying.

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You are reading from the book Food for Thought.

Developing Our Potential

Abstinence is the key to developing our potential. For years, our illness has probably controlled our life and reduced our ability to function. Since so much of our energy was tied up in the mental obsession with food and the physical effects of overeating, we were unable to develop the talents and abilities we possessed.

Getting in touch with a Higher Power gives us contact with the source of our potential. Our self-centeredness kept us from believing in our capacity to be activated by a Power greater than ourselves. When we see and hear of the results produced by working the OA program, we develop faith in our own buried talents.

When food controlled our lives, we were using only a very small percentage of our actual potential for work, recreation, and relationships with other people. Through abstinence from compulsive overeating, we discover strengths, abilities, and energies we never knew we had!

Direct my efforts. Lord.

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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
Faith is the seamstress
who mends our torn belief
who sews the hem of childhood trust
and clips the threads of grief.
--Joan Walsh Anglund
A seamstress takes large pieces of material and cuts them to size. Then, with the help of needle and thread and buttons, she goes to work to create a finished piece. Sometimes, in the beginning, it is hard to imagine a finished product. But the seamstress believes it is possible and goes to work on it.
Faith is like a seamstress. Faith is what can pull all the unfinished pieces of life into some sort of order. Faith is what lets us know we are all right even when life doesn't seem to make sense. We all need the faith to believe our skills and dreams, and even our heartaches can be sewn into a shape that is beautiful and useful.
Our faith is the seamstress who guides the needle, mends the tears, and helps create a shape and meaning to our lives.
How can I show my faith today?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
That it will never come again is what makes life so sweet. --Emily Dickinson
Life seems to be a continuous pattern of getting committed to things and having to let go - falling in love and losing the one we love, developing a job skill and having to change careers, caring for our children and letting them go off into the world. This is the rhythm of life, and our spiritual growth teaches us to make peace with it. Participating fully in the rhythm is how we become whole men. As addicts and codependents, we used our gambling, overspending, drugs, sex, work, or caretaking of others to avoid the pain of making deeper relationships and to avoid the grief over losing them.
Avoiding commitments and staying uninvolved may keep us safe from risks. They also keep us near our dangerous old patterns. Our program works when we can freely let ourselves go. First, we commit to our recovery program with no reservations. Then, in our increasing sanity we gradually let ourselves go in other attachments. We know we face losses as part of life. We will have the strength to grieve them and move on.
God, give me the inner-liberty today to let go of myself and care.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
To do nothing is failure. To try, and in the trying you make some mistakes and then you make some positive changes as a result of those mistakes, is to learn and to grow and to blossom. --Darlene Larson Jenks
Life is a process, one that is continuously changing. And with each change, we are offered unexpected opportunities for growth. Change is what fosters our development as women. It encourages us to risk new behavior and may even result in some mistakes. Fortunately, no mistakes can seriously hinder us. In fact, most mistakes give us an additional opportunity to learn.
Where we stand today is far removed from our position last year, or even last week. Each and every moment offers us new input that influences any decision from this moment forward. The process that we're participating in guarantees our growth as long as we remain conscious of our opportunities and willingly respond to them. We can be glad that the life process is, in fact, never static. always moving, always inviting us to participate fully.
I will have the courage to make a mistake today. It's a promise of growth.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Asking for Help
It's okay to ask for help.
One of the most absurd things we do to ourselves is not asking for the help we need from a friend, a family member, our Higher Power, or the appropriate resource.
We don't have to struggle through feelings and problems alone. We can ask for help from our Higher Power and for support and encouragement from our friends.
Whether what we need is information, encouragement, a hand, a word, a hug, someone who will listen, or a ride, we can ask. We can ask people for what we need from them. We can ask God for what we need from God.
It is self-defeating to not ask for the help we need. It keeps us stuck. If we ask long and hard enough, if we direct our request to the right source, we'll get the help we need.
There is a difference between asking someone to rescue us and asking someone in a direct manner for the help we need from him or her. We can be straightforward and let others choose whether to help us or not. If the answer is no, we can deal with that.
It is self-defeating to hint, whine, manipulate, or coerce help out of people. It is annoying to go to people as a victim and expect them to rescue us. It is healthy to ask for help when help is what we need.
"My problem is shame," said one woman. "I wanted to ask for help in dealing with it, but I was to ashamed. Isn't that crazy?"
We who are eager to help others can learn to allow ourselves to receive help. We can learn to make clean contracts about asking for and receiving the help we want and need.
Today, I will ask for help if I need it - from people and my Higher Power. I will not be a victim, helplessly waiting to be rescued. I will make my request for help specific, to the point, and I will leave room for the person to choose whether or not to help me. I will not be a martyr any longer by refusing to get the help I deserve in life - the help that makes life simpler. God, help me let go of my need to do everything alone. Help me use the vast Universe of resources available to me.


I have the right to have my needs met. In order to have them met, I am expressing them to the people who can help me today. --Ruth Fishel

God help me to stay sober and clean today!

francie21805
12-08-2008, 08:15 PM
Wisdom for Today

Fear continued to interfere with my life even early in my recovery. This was not something that just disappeared when I stopped using. I needed to change this, and it meant that I had to discover something called courage. There was a problem though. I thought I didn't have any; or if I did, I certainly didn't know where to find it. Where would I find this, "Courage to change the things I can?" I had no idea. So I went to my sponsor and asked him, and I went to meetings and asked people there. I heard many different answers. I wasn't getting the easy answer I wanted. I was hoping it would happen if I did something, maybe if I worked the right step or said the right prayer. No such luck! Courage was not that easy.
Then one night I went to a meeting and blurted out the question, "What is courage?" There was this old-timer sitting across the room, who cleared his throat and said, "It is when you become willing to do something even though you are scared." At last! An answer that made sense! Courage was about willingness, not bravery or fearlessness. I could become willing to make the changes I needed to make. I knew that my Higher Power would help me. I knew that my sponsor and the fellowship would help me. Yes, I was scared to make the changes I needed to make - giving up people, places and things. I could even become willing to change my attitudes, behaviors and beliefs. I was scared to death of some of these changes but became willing to change anyway. I discovered the courage I needed already existed inside of me. I just had to find it. I also believe that this courage is a gift from none other than my Higher Power. Do I believe that I already have the courage I need inside of me?

Meditations for the Heart
Sometimes courage is needed immediately, and at other times muuch struggle must be given to find the willingness in the face of fear. One thing I learned quickly was that courage was an act of the heart. I could not think my way into courage. This was a problem, because the heart is filled with desire. Sometimes my heart wanted to run and hide from the truth or from need to change. Sometimes my heart desired to be lazy. And at other times it desired to avoid, manipulate or con my way out of the need for change. I do not know how to make the heart desire to be courageous. All I can say is that it becomes much easier knowing and trusting that God is right there with me. So, when I feel fear in my heart, I know it is time to talk to my Higher Power. Sometimes I have to talk to Him quickly to find the courage needed in the moment. Other times I must talk to Him often to find the courage to make it through the struggle. I have also learned that it is important not to give up, because often the courage comes when I feel the weakest. Do I know where to turn when I need to find courage?

Petitions to my Higher Power

God,
Sometimes, I feel like my heart is all messed up. There are so many different messages I get because of my unhealthy desires. Help this day to seek after that which I know to be healthy, and give to me the courage I need along the way. Let me be watchful for the traps of the heart that can lead me backwards. Guide my steps with wisdom.

Amen.

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December 9 - Daily Feast

When the first snowflakes catch on leafless trees and crisp cold wind sweeps our faces, we know winter is in earnest. It turns the bright green canes of the wild rose to gray and sprinkles hickory nuts and walnuts on the path to the woods. The entire landscape seems to be one color - but the variation is so subtle and low-key that it takes a little while to see the green lichen and the misty blue haze that hangs over the tiny stream. Life sometimes appears to be at a standstill, and nothing is beautiful - no color, no shape, no hope. But if we refocus, if we are sincere and we use wisdom, we will move toward a new spring, just as does the season.

~ Whatever the fate of other Indians, the Iroquois might still have been a nations. ~

WA-O-WO-WA-NO-ONK - CAYUA CHIEF

'A Cherokee Feast of Days, Volume II' by Joyce Sequichie Hifler

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Elder's Meditation of the Day - December 9

"The Natural Law will prevail regardless of man-made laws, tribunals and governments."

--Traditional Circle of Elders, NAVAJO-HOPI Joint Use Area

The Great Spirit made Laws by which Man needs to live. These Laws are just and are about living in harmony. Man has passed many laws that say it is okay to do things. Many of these man-made laws are out of harmony with the Laws of the Great Spirit. These man-made laws will cause trouble for the human being if they are out of harmony with the Laws of the Creator.

Great Spirit, teach me Your Laws.

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'THINK on THESE THINGS'
by Joyce Sequichie Hifler

In this jet age when almost "instant there" is commonly accepted, the world has become very small. The days of remaining in one's own birthplace are near an end, and those who never dreamed of traveling have adjusted themselves to it quite well.

And with shorter distances between us and our neighbors it seems our worlds should find more opportunities for mutual understanding. but we must realize that even though our material worlds may be easily crossed, our thoughts are worlds apart. Until we can bring together a thinking people with the desire to create living conditions that are peaceful and full of kindness, fast travel can waver between good and bad.

A British novelist and poet, George Moore, said, "It is thought, and thought only, that divides right from wrong; it is thought, and thought only, that elevates or degrades human deeds and desires."

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Daily Relationship Reading

I may have heard someone say "I just stay in the marriage because of the kids". They explain that, although neither they nor their spouse are happy in their relationship, they try to bury their feelings of discontent, and concentrate on trying to make their children happy.

If I'm doing the same thing. am I really doing my children any favors? Maybe I forget that children learn by example much more than I realize. If I accept this, it's time to take a close look at what I'm unwittingly teaching them:

My example shows them: hide your true feelings; live to make others happy, not yourself; settle for less than you feel you deserve; others need to change for you to be happy; hide things from others when the truth seems too difficult.

If I had a crystal ball, it would be easier to see whether my efforts to "shield" my children helped them, or hurt them. But I don't. If I think back to how I learned my ways of handling difficulties though, I'll likely see that my parents gave me many of the same examples. If they didn't help me become happy, why would I expect my similar examples to do anything different for our children?


Just for Today
Today I'll ask myself if part of the reason I'm staying in this relationship is for the "children".
How much am I really helping them or hurting them by doing so?

If I truly want to give them good examples, I'll put my focus back on working on my imperfections in this relationship. If I can find loving solutions to those difficulties, that will truly be a precious gift I can give them.

I have told my son a million times not to exaggerate . - BH

francie21805
12-09-2008, 08:28 AM
Daily Inspiration for women

http://www.meditationsforwomen.com/dailys/630043.html (http://www.meditationsforwomen.com/dailys/630043.html)

francie21805
12-09-2008, 08:31 AM
Daily OM
December 9, 2008

Let It Flow
Tears
How wonderful it feels to give in and let tears flow when we are overwhelmed with emotions, whether we are happy or sad. Tears come from the soul, from our well of feelings rising from deep down. When we give in to the prickling behind our eyes and the lump in our throat to let teardrops fall from our eyes, we allow our feelings to surface so they can be set free.

Proud parents shed tears of pride in a child’s accomplishments, a baby’s first step, birthdays, and graduations. Long lost friends fall into each other’s arms, tears rolling down their cheeks when they reunite after years of separation. Tears may flow from us when we are witness to a commitment being made at a wedding or even while we are watching a love story. Tears of relief may spring forth from our eyes when we hear that a loved one has survived an ordeal, and tears may fall when we bow our head in sorrow over a loss or death. Tears born from heartache can flow like they’ll never cease, whether our tears are for a love that is over, a friendship lost, or an opportunity missed. We shed tears because of disappointment in ourselves, tragedy in the world, pain, and illness. Tears of anger can burn with emotion as they fall down our faces. Tears offer us a physical release of our feelings.

Shedding tears can sometimes make us feel better, although it can feel like the tears will never end once the floodgates are open. There is no shame in letting tears flow freely and frequently. Tears are as natural to us as is breathing. There is beauty in allowing yourself to be vulnerable enough to shed tears. Open up, release your tears, and let your feelings flow.

Published with permission from Daily OM