JoyM
01-14-2009, 03:47 AM
Dear Friends of NA,
I feel the grateful towards you all for being alive, well and clean .Sometimes I say it out loud and at times I express it in letters. But all the time I pray – let my gratitude find expression in kindness, compassion and positive action and let me reach out to newcomers and oldtimers, too. But today is something special.
You see I came to NA with little hope, very little honesty and no self-love at all.I had a huge big ego and bigger worries and fear. I was afraid – so afraid that this beautiful NA program that works wonders for others will not work for me I could not accept love let alone give or feel love for anyone. I came , I saw & I was conquered . Rather , the denial & ego was conquered. I saw people , rich and poor – but happy all the same. I found love , and so much of it I was conquered.I was accepted , unconditionally , till I could accept myself a little. I was loved till I could love myself. Little by little I was changed and I changed for the better. I was able to laugh and joke.fear was being replaced by faith. I could find and trust a Higher Power.
Early recovery was tough – strange feelings , emptiness and low morale .And then the folks in the rooms said “Keep coming back.It only gets better.And don’t leave before the miracle happens.” So I kept coming back .
I called one fellow , talked, and I felt better. Called another and felt stronger. Made one friend and then another and then the endless friendship and goodwill just engulfed me. I felt the love , hope and courage flowing into me .Things like honesty & gratitude were real , not mere words. Life started to be more & more enjoyable .The world looked a better place.
That is HOW it worked for me and this is what I like to share with you all today .Because I believe that if I want to keep it I got to share it with you all, else I may lose it.
So on this day , my second clean date anniversary I want to thank you for the help , the E,S & H , the unconditional love- for everything. Please keep loving . Keep coming back!
Joy M
I feel the grateful towards you all for being alive, well and clean .Sometimes I say it out loud and at times I express it in letters. But all the time I pray – let my gratitude find expression in kindness, compassion and positive action and let me reach out to newcomers and oldtimers, too. But today is something special.
You see I came to NA with little hope, very little honesty and no self-love at all.I had a huge big ego and bigger worries and fear. I was afraid – so afraid that this beautiful NA program that works wonders for others will not work for me I could not accept love let alone give or feel love for anyone. I came , I saw & I was conquered . Rather , the denial & ego was conquered. I saw people , rich and poor – but happy all the same. I found love , and so much of it I was conquered.I was accepted , unconditionally , till I could accept myself a little. I was loved till I could love myself. Little by little I was changed and I changed for the better. I was able to laugh and joke.fear was being replaced by faith. I could find and trust a Higher Power.
Early recovery was tough – strange feelings , emptiness and low morale .And then the folks in the rooms said “Keep coming back.It only gets better.And don’t leave before the miracle happens.” So I kept coming back .
I called one fellow , talked, and I felt better. Called another and felt stronger. Made one friend and then another and then the endless friendship and goodwill just engulfed me. I felt the love , hope and courage flowing into me .Things like honesty & gratitude were real , not mere words. Life started to be more & more enjoyable .The world looked a better place.
That is HOW it worked for me and this is what I like to share with you all today .Because I believe that if I want to keep it I got to share it with you all, else I may lose it.
So on this day , my second clean date anniversary I want to thank you for the help , the E,S & H , the unconditional love- for everything. Please keep loving . Keep coming back!
Joy M