Daily Reprieve - Feb

[janbear]

MY WAY OR GOD’S



“But the more we fought and tried to have our own way, the worse matters got.” Alcoholics Anonymous, page 66



“You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised.” Hebrews 10:36



For what it's worth: My way, without God, led me near death and the gates of hell. So, why do I still insist on my way? Time in recovery has taught me the value of letting go and letting God. Yet, I fight to have my own way, placing my will first, insanely making me a god above God, and idiotically believing my way will be better than God's. Thank God, there has been improvement, but I still fail, especially when God seems so slow. I know from experience that it makes matters worse, causes me anxiety, and places me closer to relapse then I care to admit. That is when I need to go to my Heavenly Father and ask Him to help me persevere. He always does. And He doesn’t mind if I fuss with Him a little about how slow He seems sometime. He smiles and firmly reminds me Who is the Boss.



God bless you!



Joe W.

[janbear]

HIS DRUNK



“For we are now on a different basis; the basis of trusting and relying upon God.” Alcoholics Anonymous, page 68



“But I trust in you, O LORD; I say, ‘You are my God.’" Psalm 31:14



For what it's worth: It is miraculous that this once powerless drunk has been through so many trying times without even considering the drink. Indeed, miraculous - the grace of a loving Heavenly Father. He protected me most recently from two life-threatening infectious diseases. One resulted in a lower leg amputation that will require extensive rehabilitation. But just watch; He will have me recovering in no time. It has to be, because He is my God and I am His once worthless drunk, and He has more for me to do … walking.



God bless you!



Joe W.

[janbear]

IN HIS CARE



“I placed myself unreservedly under His care and direction.” Alcoholics Anonymous, page 13



“Give your burdens to the LORD, and he will take care of you.” Psalm 55:22



For what it's worth: Avoiding Him, rejecting Him, cursing Him did not keep Him away. The “Hound of Heaven” sought my soul and finally hunted me down near the gates of hell. In His loving mercy, God rescued me, and, in His infinite wisdom, He knew Alcoholics Anonymous was the only place under the sun where I would drop my stubborn defenses and open my hardened heart. He guided me there to the care and acceptance of a wise and tricky bunch of drunks. They accomplished something that otherwise would never have occurred. They taught me how to stay sober and live according to spiritual principles that produced a peaceful life. Perhaps, more importantly, they started me on a wondrous journey with the God who saved me. I take His hand and He and I walk together into each new day's burdens or joys. Nothing - absolutely nothing - happens to us that we cannot handle together.



God bless you!



Joe W.

[janbear]

SPIRITUAL SPARK



“It [Alcoholics Anonymous] never fails if you go about it with one half the zeal you have been in the habit of showing when getting another drink.” Alcoholics Anonymous, page 181



“Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord.” Romans 12:11



For what it's worth: By the time I arrived at the doorstep of Alcoholics Anonymous, my spirit was gone. Alcoholism had absorbed all of my zeal and I had been living in despair for years. I desperately needed motivation just to keep on living. I found it at my first meeting, but I was too confused to know it was hope. Despite strong resistance at first, it was that hope that kept me coming back. Ever so slowly, with God's grace and the example of the people in Alcoholics Anonymous, I started climbing the Steps up to a new way of living. Years of daily practice of the principles of Alcoholics Anonymous have turned my new way of life into a daily spiritual journey with most days full of zeal and spiritual fervor. On the days when I am weak and there is no spiritual spark, I can talk with my Heavenly Father and He will give me His Spirit to carry me through.



God bless you!



Joe W.

[janbear]

A CHANGE OF BELIEF



“They have a new attitude, and they have been saved from a living death.” Alcoholics Anonymous, page 150



“…We all can be saved in this same way, no matter who we are or what we have done.” Romans 3:22



For what it's worth: Disappointing Him, rebelling against Him, cursing Him, did not gain God's favor. If He judged and punished as I was taught, I would not be saved. That belief fed my alcoholism, filled my soul with guilt, and led to years of despair. Changing that belief is perhaps my richest reward of recovery in Alcoholics Anonymous. The spiritual awakening that I experienced as the result of living our Twelve Steps created in me a totally different, positive attitude and philosophy toward life and death. It is amazing that the simple act of putting the cork in the bottle and walking into an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting can be the beginning of such miracles!




God bless you!



Joe W.

[janbear]

THE RIGHT PATH



“We usually conclude the period of meditation with a prayer that we be shown all through the day what our next step is to be, that we be given whatever we need to take care of such problems.” Alcoholics Anonymous, page 87



“My steps have held to your paths; my feet have not slipped.” Psalm 17:5



For what it's worth: The next step was to a drink during my alcoholic days, and each step was leading deeper into hell. Instead, I was blessed beyond measure. My weak, dying steps were placed on a path where rarely do we see anyone fail; the only one, I believe, where I could follow the directions of my guides, knowing they had already traveled the path. My guides in Alcoholics Anonymous showed me how to take the Steps, how to find out what my Higher Power wanted my next step to be, and how to pray to be given whatever I needed to take the next step. I have been practicing what I was taught for years now, and it works. If I miss a step, or start to fall, I reach out to my Heavenly Father. He is always there to keep my feet from slipping off the right path.



God bless you!



Joe W.

[janbear]

THE DREAD IS GONE



“As we felt new power flow in, as we enjoyed peace of mind, as we discovered we could face life successfully, as we became conscious of His presence, we began to lose our fear of today, tomorrow or the hereafter.” Alcoholics Anonymous, page 63



“Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me.” Psalm 23:4



For what it's worth: Each day began with horrible dread; agonizing fears filled the day; and I could barely wait for the first drink to begin the calm. But the drink betrayed me when the calm turned to dread and fear. That drove me through the doors of Alcoholics Anonymous where I have been granted a lasting peace and joy. There have been battles in sobriety with crippling anxiety and deep depression. By the grace of God, I did not drink. Actually, I suffered awhile, and then I rose up and found myself further along the right path, walking closer with my Heavenly Father. No wonder I smile each morning as soon as I am awake enough to realize that the dread is gone. My Heavenly Father is present in my life and I fear no evil!



God bless you!



Joe W.

[janbear]

VALE OF JOY



“We cannot subscribe to the belief that this life is a vale of tears, though it once was just that for many of us.” Alcoholics Anonymous, page 133



“You'll see God's smile and celebrate, finding yourself right with God.” Job 33:26 (The Message)



For what it's worth: My diseased existence was “a vale of tears”, and I saw no chance of change. Living in that despair for years, I was suicidal when I walked into my first Alcoholics Anonymous meeting. I was too sick to realize what it was back then, but there I saw God's smile in your faces; I felt His warmth in your acceptance; and, I found a drop of hope that has grown into an ocean full. Those smiles, the acceptance, and the hope kept me coming back long enough to walk through that “vale of tears” and take that first Step up those Twelve Steps to a vale of joy. I celebrate with a heart full of gratitude, but I remember how long I cried. God knows, I never want to go back. I will not go back today. I am busy keeping myself “right with God”.



God bless you!



Joe W.

[janbear]

AN UNBEATABLE COMBINATION



“God has abundantly supplied this world with fine doctors, psychologists, and practitioners of various kinds. Do not hesitate to take your health problems to such persons.” Alcoholics Anonymous, page 133



The blind see, the lame walk, lepers are cleansed, the deaf hear, the dead are raised, the wretched of the earth learn that God is on their side.” Matthew 11:5 (The Message)



For what it’s worth: It was a damaged package full of broken contents that arrived at the door of Alcoholics Anonymous the day I arrived. Severe wreckage from alcoholism on top of deep scars from earlier years would demand far more than sobriety. Of course, I had to stay sober long enough to get well enough to realize I needed professional help to heal the whole of me. Alcoholics Anonymous gave me the years of sobriety and the Higher Power I needed to get started. I believe God led me to the right Professionals, and I know he has been with me through the peaks and pits of inner healing. Today I am a whole package with only slightly damaged parts thanks to an unbeatable combination: a loving and merciful God, the God-given program of Alcoholics Anonymous, and skilled, understanding Professionals.



God bless you!



Joe W.

[janbear]

LIFE’S PLANS



“The central fact of our lives today is the absolute certainty that our Creator has entered into our hearts and lives in a way which is indeed miraculous." Alcoholics Anonymous, page 25

"The Lord will work out his plans for my life..." Psalm 138: 8

For what it's worth: Wandering through life in a drunken haze with no plan other than to drink for oblivion was what I did every day for years. I was always going to change, writing my marvelous plans down some nights while I was drinking, so I would remember them. The next morning, I could not even read them. But change did occur. Everything got worse, and I became suicidal. Afraid of dying and facing God, I sought help. The last place I went, and the only place that worked, was Alcoholics Anonymous. It is in Alcoholics Anonymous God taught me, if I keep my will out of His way, perhaps even cooperate in my weak way, He accomplishes miracles in my life. My Heavenly Father has repeatedly proven to me that he loves me dearly, and He will work out absolutely everything for my good. This once worthless drunk certainly cannot beat that. So, why don’t I just get out of his way? The old-timers up in Baltimore where I got sober told me about a mechanic’s shop sign that read:

Labor, $10.

If you watch, $20.

If you help, $100.



God bless you!



Joe W.

[janbear]

A CLEAN HEART AND A NEW SPIRIT


"Are we now ready to let God remove from us all the things which we have admitted are objectionable?” Alcoholics Anonymous, page 76

“Create in me a clean heart, O God. Renew a right spirit within me." Psalm 51: 10

For what it's worth: Each drunk was a fall deeper into my self-built prison. And it seemed I had an everlasting sentence with no hope of escape, until the day I walked into a meeting of Alcoholics Anonymous. There I found a way to freedom, the Twelve Steps. And so it has been, except when I hang onto something I will not let go, I step back into my self-made jail - without the drink. Once I hurt enough and realize the insanity of my action might trigger the drink, I become grateful that Alcoholics Anonymous is an adjustable wrench that fits any nut, and I use the tools of the Program. Step Six tells me to beg God for willingness to be willing. When I become willing, I pray our Seventh Step prayer: “My Creator, I am now willing that you should have all of me, good and bad. I pray that you now remove from me every single defect of character which stands in the way of my usefulness to you and my fellows.” When I humbly ask, my Heavenly Father always responds and creates a clean heart where there was filth and a new spirit where there was darkness and decay. He does so according to His schedule, not mine. And I must admit, there are times when His schedule seems slow.



God bless you!



Joe W.

[janbear]

2/17

FEELINGS OF INADEQUACY



“Did I try to cover up those feelings of inadequacy by bluffing, cheating, lying, or evading responsibility?” 12&12 p.51



“I came to you in weakness and fear.” 1 Corinthians 2:3



For what it’s worth: Years of sobriety were required to see how profoundly feelings of inadequacy influenced my drinking, my behavior, and my recovery. I believed I had failed as a child because I could not fix my dysfunctional family, and I never gained approval from my parents. As an adult, I eventually failed to please everyone, especially God. So I surrender to the bottle. Blessedly, the agony of alcoholism drove me to Alcoholics Anonymous. Even there, at first, I wore a mask of strength and competence. Gradually, as I felt your acceptance of me with my weaknesses and fears, I dropped my front. And you loved me just as I am. Better yet, you introduced me to a Higher Power that I came to believe loves me unconditionally. How wonderful it is to know that He is proud of me!



God bless you!



Joe W.

[janbear]

ABUNDANT HOPE



"The hopelessness has been replaced by abundant hope and sincere faith." Alcoholics Anonymous, page 475 (4th Ed.)



"We also exult in our tribulations, knowing that tribulation brings about perseverance; and perseverance, proven character; and proven character, hope; and hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out within our hearts through the Holy Spirit who was given to us." Romans 5:1-5



For what it's worth: Despair choked all happiness out of each day of the last years of this drunk’s miserable existence. Death would have been welcome, but it would not come, despite my attempts. Finally, I attended an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting. There a totally unexpected seed of hope entered my empty soul. Back then, I did not know what it was, but I knew how good it felt. I kept coming back to the meetings and started living the Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous, and that seed started growing into a life full of hope. Sober experiences began to pile up that proved no matter what happened, if I did not drink, personal growth and blessings resulted. Often God even used my experience to help another suffering soul. It was hard for a once worthless drunk to believe. And even more, I was developing some dignity and learning to trust. Now that I have practiced the principles of Alcoholics Anonymous a number of years, my faith in God’s love overflows, and He and I are ready for anything.



God bless you!



Joe W.

[janbear]

GIFTS FROM AN AWESOME GOD



"To some extent we have become God-conscious." Alcoholics Anonymous, page 85



"Come...shout with joy...for the Lord is awesome!" Psalm 47: 1 & 2


For what it's worth: Fear and anger dominated my thoughts about God for years. To some extent I was God-conscious; conscious that my life displeased Him; conscious He would punish me; and, conscious that He wanted nothing to do with me. However, the good people in Alcoholics Anonymous assured me He did. Many of them had been just like me, and hearing their experiences gave me hope. So I followed their example, and now my own personal experience with the God of my understanding causes me to become more aware of His presence in my daily life. As I do, I shout for joy at his many blessings, all undeserved and freely given.



God bless you!



Joe W.

[janbear]

A JOURNEY OF MIRACLES



“Our own conception (of God), however inadequate, was sufficient to make the approach and to effect a contact with Him.” Alcoholics Anonymous, page 46.



“Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life.” Psalm 23: 6


For what it's worth: My concept of a harsh Judge dispensing eternal sentences caused me to fear God, and to avoid Him. My alcoholism performed that mission well, until it betrayed me and would no longer quiet my loudly shameful soul. Seeking only relief, I knocked on the doors of Alcoholics Anonymous. What opened to me was the opportunity to take responsibility for finding a God of my own understanding. This approach worked with me, and I began a search that brought me to my God, a kind, merciful, and loving Heavenly Father. He and I are now together on an awesome spiritual journey of miracles that I trust will be a life of sobriety, one day at a time, and an eternity of joy.



God bless you!



Joe W.

[janbear]

AN EASIER WAY



"We do not tire so easily, for we are not burning up energy foolishly as we did when we were trying to arrange life to suit ourselves." Alcoholics Anonymous, page 88



"Let us run with endurance the race that God has set before us." Hebrews 12:1


For what it's worth: Arranging life was not good enough; I also tried to arrange people to suit myself. No wonder I ended up alone, with only cockroaches for houseguests. When all the insanity finally beat me down, and I was sober in Alcoholics Anonymous, I had to stop trying to have life my way. I seek God’s help every day, and years of practice have produced some progress, but nothing near perfection. I still tend to fall back into the control trap, especially on those days when I do not focus on letting go and letting God. His way, of course, even when it runs me uphill, is easier than my way.



God bless you!



Joe W.

[janbear]

ENOUGH FOR ONE DAY



“Every day is a day when we must carry the vision of God's will into all of our activities.” Alcoholics Anonymous, page 85



“O Lord, My God, you have done many miracles for us.” Psalm 40:5


For what it's worth: Self-centered thoughts and motives were the core of my miserable existence. Tragically, while I was drinking, I had no idea there was anything unhealthy in that. Sober in Alcoholics Anonymous, however, I learned self-centeredness destroys drunks like me. That motivated me. I began a life-long struggle with the “his majesty, the baby” in me. That spoiled, selfish brat always wants his will, his way, right now. All Twelve Steps and a truck load of God’s grace were necessary to do battle with this stubborn devil. Miraculously, but progressively, over my years in Alcoholics Anonymous, changes have occurred deep inside me. I now start the day asking that my Heavenly Father's will be done in my life. Then I try to focus on His will throughout the day, keeping “his majesty, the baby” out of His way. That is plenty for one day. I have no need and no energy to be troubled about another.



God bless you!



Joe W.

[janbear]

FROM ANTAGONISM TO OPPORTUNITY



“Many of us have been so touchy that even casual reference to spiritual things made us bristle with antagonism.” Alcoholics Anonymous, page 48



“Surely your goodness and unfailing love will pursue me all the days of my life.” Psalm 23: 6



For what it's worth: My antagonism ran deep and sprang from my ideal of the Church being shattered, and from my belief that God had destined me to die the miserable death that lurked at my door, partially welcomed, mostly feared. That fear drove me to the rooms of Alcoholics Anonymous. There I was taught the difference between religion and spirituality. There I learned of the danger of my resentments toward the Church and God. There I was given the Twelve Steps, the tools I needed to rid me of those resentments and to grow spiritually. There I found a most precious gift, a God who loved me and certainly had not condemned me. Instead, my God has given me the opportunity to have a sober and joyful life, followed by eternal peace.



God bless you!



Joe W.

[janbear]

ASKING FOR HELP



"I came to believe that I cannot do this alone." Alcoholics Anonymous, page 451, Fourth Edition



"Peace to you, and peace to him who helps you; indeed, your God helps you!"
1 Chronicles 12:18


For what it's worth: Pride nearly killed me. It still can. Pure pain was necessary to deflate my ego and allow me to do perhaps the hardest thing I have ever done, ask for help. When I finally did, I found what I needed in Alcoholics Anonymous where the Steps and some old-timers pauperize pride. Yet, after years of working on this deadly defect, there is still some hesitancy to ask for help. When that happens, I think about what my experiences asking for help and giving help have proven to me: the one asking for help is blessed; the one giving the help is blessed; and, of course, God is involved in the process; so, it always turns out to be a win-win situation with the best possible support and direction. Realizing this, I would be a fool to hesitate to ask for help the next time I need it. But my pride has made a fool of me before. So, once again in matters regarding ego, I have to beg God's help.



God bless you!



Joe W.

[janbear]

THINKING IN THE SUNSHINE



“...We ask God to direct our thinking, especially asking that it be divorced from self-pity, dishonest or self-seeking motives.” Alcoholics anonymous, page 86



“Think about things that are pure and lovely and admirable.”

Philippians 4:8



For what it's worth: Alcohol only added to the trash-filled dark and dangerous alley that was my mind. To clean it up required years of living the Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous as best I could in all my affairs throughout each day. Still garbage can creep into my thinking even before I realize it. When that happens, getting active by doing the next right thing God puts before me sweeps out the waste. An attitude of gratitude keeps junk out. And, certainly, occupying my mind with “things that are pure and lovely and admirable” keeps my thoughts clean and bright like sunlight. When I am able to do this, I know I am enjoying a precious gift from my God. I am at peace with an inner warmth, thinking in the sunshine.



God bless you!



Joe W.

[janbear]

SERENITY SUCCEEDS



“We stood in the Presence of Infinite Power and Love.” Alcoholics Anonymous, page 56



“Be silent, and know that I am God.” Psalm 46:10


For what it's worth: God and statements about God were meaningless. And fear and mistrust dominated my concept of God. Alcoholism compounded all of that until it forced me to my knees and I crawled through the doors of Alcoholics Anonymous. During my sober years in Alcoholics Anonymous, there has been no burning bush, but many personal experiences have gradually built total trust in a forgiving, loving God. And, as my trust grew, I developed a deep appreciation of His word and statements about Him. The result is a deep calm in a once severely disturbed soul. Now, when I feel agitated in any way, if I silence my loud, roaring mind, be still, and realize “the Presence of Infinite Power and Love”, serenity succeeds.



God bless you!



Joe W.

[bluidkiti]

“Circumstances made him willing to believe.” Alcoholics Anonymous, page 57


“Save me, O God, for the floodwaters are up to my neck.” Psalm 69:1


For what it's worth: The floodwaters of alcoholism were up to my neck and about to drown me before I finally reached out to Alcoholics Anonymous. Even then I fought the rescue. Despite my resistance, the people of Alcoholics Anonymous were patient and gently but firmly lifted me out of the floodwaters. I did not realize it at the time, but looking back I see many amazing, probably even miraculous circumstances that helped me surrender. Obviously, these circumstances were a saving Power in my life that I learned from the old timers was a Higher Power working anonymously. I know now that God’s Circumstances protected me even before I arrived in Alcoholics Anonymous, and ever since my first day sober. They are my safeguard now, and, most certainly, will continue to be so.



God bless you!



Joe W.