What to do when you just can't quit?

[mhull]

I'm craving alcohol. I buy it and drink it secretly and hide it from my wife and children. It's like another person comes out when I think about alcohol. The real me wants to quit....the hidden me thinks it's beer-thirty. What can you do?

[Stogi]

This reminds me that I am powerless and need my Higher power. Starting with step one is what I would suggest.

[zoomie]

You can call your local AA hot line, go to a detox, go to a rehab and learn how to live without the alcohol.

[skyhook]

The real me wants to quit....the hidden me thinks it's beer-thirty.

The on-going process of recovery (quiting) is coming back to truths that transform.

The real me and the hidden me are one and the same and the nagging false notion that they can be seperate or compartmentalized is foolish.

Sane choices verses disfunctional choices is where the distincton occurs, and this is where we are retraining our mind to engage in healing behavior.

You are asking the right questions, ...open yourself up to broader answers and encouragement that this community can offer you in abundance. The answers will seem foreign to you at first, but trust in your higher power and apply yourself to them consistantly.

You will amazed what a wonderful and retrainable thing the mind really is.

Peace to you.

[sioux]

For me it required a public admission at an AA meeting, that I had a problem, and then I came to surrender, accept, that my human will power was futile whn it came to quittng drinking alone. I had to let others in to help me, and then, I had to accept their help.

[KeepComingBack]

My sponsor told me to ask 2 questions
1) When I drink do I have little control over the amount that I drink? Physical allergy
2) Despite bad things happening when I drink, do I still have a problem quitting drinking? Mental obsession
optional: Have i ever had a sunburn on the roof of my mouth?

If you can go here
http://alcoholism.about.com/od/aaoh/Ohio_AA_Meeting_Contacts.htm

you can find a meeting, and hopefully help another alcoholic/s stay sober.
KCB

[d10y]

Just a heads up....

hmmm well dude... I am not as nice as the other's who have read and shared their experience w/ you...

What to do when you just can't quit
You have already defeated your purpose in your opening statement...
Your not ready to quit drinking yet... If you are ready perhaps rethinking about what it is you want.? And What your willing to do for it?

My suggestion to you is this.... Get real, get honest w/yourself and admit that your alkie

....STEP ONE. WE admitted that we were powerless over alcohol—that our life had become unmanageable.

We learned that we had to fully concede to our innermost selves that we were alcoholics. [Big Book page 30, line 11]

It's like another person comes out when I think about alcohol. The real me wants to quit

Daniel W. defines as, "An impulse or feeling of being irresistibly driven toward the performance of some action which is irrational."

Dr.. Silkworth, in The Doctor's Opinion, tells us that:

...the action of alcohol on these chronic alcoholics is a manifestation of an allergy; that the phenomenon of craving is limited to this class and never occurs in the average temperate drinker, [Big Book page xxvi, line 4]

The real me wants to quit....the hidden me thinks it's beer-thirty. What can you do?

"the persistent and disturbing intrusion of, or anxious and inescapable preoccupation with, an idea or emotion...". In other words, it seems as if the alcohol calls us with voice irresistible until we have little choice but to start the drinking process anew. This affliction is strictly mental until the alcohol enters the body. Then, we are back to the first test—again. In fact,

...the main problem of the alcoholic centers in his mind, rather than in his body. [Big Book page 23, line 5]

...the mental states that precede a relapse into drinking...(are)... the crux of the problem, [Big Book page 35, line 1]


BEFORE YOU TAKE THAT NEXT DRINK OF ALCOHOL:



1) POSTPONE THE DRINK. You have undoubtedly had character defects such as procrastination, sloth, laziness, denial and fear. So, USE THEM right now in a constructive way by postponing that drink. You know you can hold off for 10 minutes, an hour, or even more. And, while you are delaying the destroyer, take the remedies listed below:

2) STAY AWAY FROM ALCOHOL. If you are in a bar or a place where liquor is available to you, go somewhere else where there is no booze for a while, at least.

3) PRAY. Ask God to keep alcohol from entering your body and to remove the obsession to drink. This action can and should be done repeatedly while you are following the rest of this survival plan.

4) GO TO AN A.A. meeting. GET a sponsor!

4)CALL SOBER PEOPLE. Tell them that you DONT want to take a drink. but the "inner you" is going insane. Give your sponsor a chance to relieve the insanity of taking a drink. Or, call anybody who can help, even Central Office (818) 988-3001. In anticipation of finding a lifeguard,

[d10y]

p.s Keep coming back....


Ours is a simple program NOT easy it requires work...
As alkies or addicts whatever you confess too... Me I am a RECOVERED alkie/junkie 10 yrs. I am Old school Big Book. I believe in the steps and the power of the programn...

We are a spiritual group who have seen and came back from the gates of hell....

MY sobriety is contingent to my spirituality....

[Rockin Big Daddy]

Read pages 354-358 in the BB and page 417.

Alcohol's Promise

I am more powerful than al the combined armies of the world.

I have destroyed more men than all the wars of the nations.

I have caused millions of accidents and wrecked more homes

than all the floods, tornadoes and hurricanes put together.

I am the world's slickest thief,

I steal billions of dollars each year.

I find my victims among the sick and poor alike,

the young, the strong and the weak.

I loom up to such proportions that I cast a shadow

over a field of labor. I am relentless, insidious and unpredictable.

I am everywhere, in the home, on the street,

in the factory, in the office, on the sand and in the air.

I bring sickness, poverty and even death.

I give nothing and take all.

I am your worst enemy.

I am alcohol.

I am patient and I am waiting.

[DavidNOLA]

Your admission reminds me of where I was at after my son was born. I was supposed to get sober through AA meetings but white knuckled the program. As soon as my son's mom and my son took off for a weekend with relatives, I bought alcohol and continued to drink by hiding it until I convinced/lied her that I could handle it again. Yeah.
It took me 3 long and painful years for me to kick it.

I was kicked out of the house, lost over 60 lbs, never paid bills, got arrested twice, lied and stole from family and friends, became physically addicted to alcohol and much more.

If you can get honest with yourself and others, you have a great shot. Remember that it's a journey and it requires discipline. If you are lucky that discipline will turn into passion.

[BIG AL]

I tell u I did the same thing.I didnt quit till I was actually put somewhere to clear my head.Only problem is it had bars that helm in in not that served drinks.No matter how hard I tried i just couldnt.I went to jail and then a county treatment center were I didnt decide to stay sober till maybe the last 2 months.You dont have to go that far but chances are if youdont do something you will if you stay alive tha long.This disease we have kills lots of very great folks.

[Rich75]

Hello and Welcome :74: The answer is in yourself. You know, I know it. When you ask for help, you get it. Keep asking. Keep trying, don't give up before the miracle. You too can be sober one day at a time. Thanks for sharing.:D

[marjieruth]

I wish there were an easy answer.....wanting to drink consumes my mind. i wake up thinking about it....and go to bed thinking about it. it has gotten easier over the weeks....i havent had one sip...which i think has helped me. I am also on the medicine anabuse...where physically i cant drink it....which has helped me....i remember i use to wake up ..thinking...how was i gonna sneak my alcohol today...when...i would tell myself..not to have too many...b/c i dont want anyone to know if im drunk..but then i would get drunk..pass out..and start all over. you tell yourself you will only have one...then it turns into a six pack..then you realize you want more...go buy another six pack..and before you know it...you had a 12 pack...and its only noon. it's vicious, haunting cycle. my worst day in sobriety is better than my worst day drunk. how true is that.

[johnswork]

The problem for me was that I couldn't stop putting that crap in my mouth, and not putting that crap in my mouth was the solution to putting that crap in my mouth....it was quite a dilemna!!
So pray your butt off, go to an unreasonable number of meetings, as you become capable try some of the suggestions you hear at those meetings, and if that fails...repeat the above guidance while trying not to die.
I seriously doubt that you are a particularly difficult case for Alcoholics Anonymous.
God Bless,
John

[mhull]

No, I don't think my case is that difficult. I used to drink frequently, 4-6 times a week (mostly in college and when just out). I, for the past 3 years, have only drank 1-2 times per week. Usually on a Friday night, and usually a 12 pack. The problem is, my wife recognizes it as a problem...I have come to agree with her since I can't stop. I lie about it and hide it. I wait until she goes to bed and drink away.

I know many people have a problem much more severe than mine...but none-the-less....I still can't stop and it is a problem. :(

[Jay Bee]

Hello Mhull, We practice...We go to meeting...We have sponsors...We have a network of people We talk to...We have tools the program has giving us...We SURRENDER:15:...If you put nothing in,you will receive nothing back...SURRENDER means, not having to fight anymore. We accept our addiction and life the way it is. We become WILLING to do whatever is necessary to stay clean & sober, even the things WE don't like doing. We PRACTICE one day at a time:15:. I will pray for you, because i understand it's hard BUT it gets better with PRACTICE:195:

[Doraine]

Mhull I agree with Jay Bee it takes practice to stay sober. It's not how much you drink but what it does to you. I didn't think I could stop either. I prayed and the obsession to drink was removed.

[weezy]

Hi Mhull, alchohol was not my addiction but crack cocaine was. Before letting go and letting GOD, I saw no way I could ever stop, that is the plain truth. I was hiding from my loving husband, smoking it anywhere I could. I would make excuses to go somewhere, like the grocery store, anywhere, (we work together too my hubby and I). I lied, stole and hurt the people i loved best, including myself. I was spending $500.00 / day or more (we had $$$ dont anymore) but I now have God, and without him I would not be here today. I have been clean since 3/16/09. I know you may read this and think, wow, that's not long, but I also was busted in october and went into rehab, came out and fought with my life the demons that were haunting me. My cravings were horrible and I just couldn't do it. On March 16, I was caught again, I believe I wanted to be and finally saw through the lords eyes what I was doing to myself and my family and friends. I never felt so all alone, scared and ashamed. I have been clean since then, I have been going to meetings, I constantly read on this board and other boards, but the one thing that has been the true saving grace for me is finding GOD. I always knew something in my life was missing. I always wanted to give in to God, but was always just an inch away, I wasn't ready. Then it happened. What a feeling!!! I can't really explain it in words. I have not had an urge, a craving, a withdrawl...nothing!!! Keep in mind how much I was doing, I was using 24 hours a day (and nite). Yet letting go and letting God was the answer. I am sorry to ramble on, but I just wanted to let you know that you can do it, I am praying for you and will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. I am not pushing anything at all on you, I just wanted you to know how I was helped.
With love
Weezy:42::195: