in way to deep

[xbabigirl631]

I guess i've known deep down for about a year i've needed help. but i was just having to much fun.. a couple of bad nights with blackouts and doing things i regretted every once and awhile but eventually i got over it by the time it was time for the next drink. which is always the next day. i havent woken up a day for the past month without shaking because i need a drink. i dont know who to turn to, nobody at this college is going to understand. i guess i knew i hit rock bottom on saturday. i woke up naked in my own bed with a black eye and bruises all over my body. my phone was completely dead and couldnt be revived even if u didnt charge it. when i did get a new phone, i checked my voicemails and had a voicemail from a guy ive been talking to for about a week (he actually owns the bar..funny) cursing me out because i told everyone in the bar i had been dating him for two years. i have no idea any of this happened. i just want to forget everything in my past and start over. i cant do that though. this is going to be so hard i dont even know if i can do it. i need help....

[Just42Dave]

You can do this..

[DaveH]

Welcome to the site....And if you choose, welcome to recovery. Everything you describe sounds very familiar, I too would wake up in situations and places that I had no idea how I got there. The good news is that it doesn't have to continue. You will find people who understand and can show you the way out, both on this site and in recovery meetings in your area. Please remember that you are not alone. I remember thinking that I could not do it either..... that hopeless feeling is a haunting one. And I would not have been able to if I tried it alone. But I reached out like you are doing and other addicts and alcoholics reached back. I began attending meetings in my area, met people who were sober and happy, and began working the 12 steps of AA. It worked for me which convinces me that it will work for you. Keep coming back and asking questions. You are in my thoughts and prayers.
Regards,
DaveH

[zoomie]

When I was your age I did things and had things happen to me too. I'm surpirsed that your school does not a person or an office you can go to. Most colleges do. As suggested above I too went to AA, then I found out about a detox and went there. I am sure that most of your friends know you have a problem if your waking up with a black eye and cause problems at a bar. You just have to find the number of your local AA and call the hot line. I'm sure that they will help you. Help is out there if you reach out. We are here too and will help you in any way we can! You can beat this babygirl (love the name). You are never to young to start!

[Rocket2d4]

I got sober @ 22.
Not the easiest thing in the world.

Here's something about recovery and the stima of admitting
I have a problem. The truth of the matter is I drank alot less
the other people. My life was more manageable than other people.
I love to party and hardie too. On the surface I looked like any
other social drinker becuase I was a social drinker and then some.

It's not easy that's why not everyone dose it. Not everyone
is willing to see the truth. The truth of the matter is I'm alot
more well than a lot of people. I decide to make corrections
in my life at a very young age...while some people continue
down the path of destructions without even know what hitted them.

It was one of the biggest chioce and decisions I had to make
in my entire life. It wasn't easy to face the pains...
But I decided to show to life and cast away the delusions.

Not in wild dreams or could I ever imagine not drinking or
getting high for the rest of my life. I love getting F-up.
What was I going to do without getting F-up?
How was I going to live?

I did it 5 mins at a time becuase I was so sick and tired of
being sick and tired even at the age of 22.
The truth of the matter is I have a lot more guts and courage
then the average joe or normal people.

[Will W]

:103:I am an addict named Will.
Your story is all to familiar to me. I lived in active addiction for 30 years and much of that time I do not remember. One of the reasons I stayed out there so long was because I didn't think I could do anything else and was scared to try.( o.k. that's two excuses )
I finally reached a point where it was get better or die. I found the Fellowship of N.A. and saw people who had been where I was and were recovering, living meaningfull productive happy lives.
It takes work on a daily basis but don't get me wrong it is not hard work it's rewarding, easy, fun work.I have been in recovery for six years and Love every second of my life now. Even the hard times are not so bad.
I'm sure there are 12 step Fellowships in your area. People in either Fellowship will welcome you with open arms and you will see what your life can be. Helpline numbers for both N.A.and A.A. are in most phonebooks and/or available through 411. Na.org has meeting schedules for anywhere in the world. I'm sure A.A. has a website also. There might even be links here I don't know I'm new to this sight
You don't have to suffer for most of your life like I did .Help is available from people who care. To many people have died from this, I don't want us to lose you that way. Please give yourself a chance.:42:

[Rockin Big Daddy]

The First Drink

The first thing I learned that day was that if I never took another drink
I would never have another problem with alcohol. . .
I had never thought about the first drink.
I had schemed and stolen drinks, but it was never the first one.
And here I had a very simple problem -- one drink,
and that's all I was able to understand.
- Experience, Strength and Hope, p. 216

Thought to Ponder . . .
The first drink has the last say.