Depression

[mmarq56]

I have a big thing with depression and anger. I get so irritable. I guess that's just part of recovery. The meetings really help me with this but I am going to a doctor and find out what's really going on. I just don't want to drink anymore and I know I have so many issues. I tried to self-medicate with alcohol and drugs (pain pills) and now I don't want any of it but have big problems with anger. I just know if I hang in there, things will get better. :6:

[fredos417]

-a mental state characterized by a pessimistic sense of inadequacy and a despondent lack of activity
-a long-term economic state characterized by unemployment and low prices and low levels of trade and investment
-natural depression: a sunken or depressed geological formation
-sad feelings of gloom and inadequacy
-a period during the 1930s when there was a worldwide economic depression and mass unemployment
-low: an air mass of lower pressure; often brings precipitation; "a low moved in over night bringing sleet and snow"
-depressive disorder: a state of depression and anhedonia so severe as to require clinical intervention
-a concavity in a surface produced by pressing; "he left the impression of his fingers in the soft mud"
-angular distance below the horizon (especially of a celestial object)
-pushing down; "depression of the space bar on the typewriter"

[zoomie]

I too was an angry person. I stopped drinking and my anger was still there. I had to go see a shrink and take meds and it help really! AA and the 12 steps are wonderful,but when they can't help, a doctor can.

[jimhere]

I have a big thing with depression and anger. I get so irritable. I guess that's just part of recovery. The meetings really help me with this but I am going to a doctor and find out what's really going on. I just don't want to drink anymore and I know I have so many issues. I tried to self-medicate with alcohol and drugs (pain pills) and now I don't want any of it but have big problems with anger. I just know if I hang in there, things will get better. :6:


If I may, may I ask a question?

Where are you at in your recovery? By that I mean are you actively involved in the steps? And if so, where at, what step?

Hanging in there might not get better, it might get worse. Hanging in there is hard work and it will grind you down. The secret is to let go.
Jim

[Honey Barbara]

mmarQ
I am only a week into recovery, so the sage advice from people much further down the journey will be more valuable to you - I just wondered if - in addition to seeing a doctor and other advice you had considered meditation. Breathing is an extraordinary tool for anger - all you need is a cd - I do have to warn you though - there are some with uber annoying voices. Listening to a cd while you are in a quiet comfortable place will put you back in control. There is nothing esoteric about it, it's just breathing really deeply and going within. I get super streesed from long days in the kitchen, I have really come to rely on this little cd - on my i-pod which i just pop in when I have 15 minutes to spare.
Just a thought.
Good luck -
Honey barbxxx

[Craig A.]

I have bouts/moments of depression/anxiety still today, the beautiful thing about it is I don't have to self medicate myself today ( drinking, drugging, etc... ). When I run into those "moments" I think about my past and where I am now, about how I am improving my life. My disease will work in anyway to discourage me and keep me captive so I can't help others, I don't believe the "lie" anymore! I think about gratitude for my sobriety, I remind myself that life is a series of moments, which one moment or another will not last forever. The biggest change for me is learning to accept myself for who I am and letting God be the director/employer/parent who takes care of me! So I start talking/praying to Him right away and then listen/meditate on His Love for me! I always stay connected to people (sponsors, friends, people in A.A. ), tell on myself and do my best to love myself! My sponsor would always tells me when I get in those spots write down my thoughts on paper, then after that write down the reality of my life. When I get both on paper I can see the lie and ask for help and see the defects/inactions and I can choose to do something different. Someone once told me that what you do behind closed doors will be the deciding factor for you, I see what he meant by that! Remember this is a one day at a time program we did not destroy our lives overnight we can't rebuild our lives overnight either! Keep the faith, hope, and love of this program and you will see life as it really is not as we see it! You will learn that picking up different glasses will help, I hoped this helped and take care!!!

[hummingbird]

My A-Dad's disease, and Co-D Mom's enabling of it, is what first triggered my depression as a teenager. Their ongoing dysfunction, and sabotage of the lives of my son and myself, are partly what cause my own depression to persist.

We can't have functional lives with them in it, apparently...

mmarQ
I just wondered if - in addition to seeing a doctor and other advice you had considered meditation.

When I was pregnant I also started yoga, and found it great--stretching can really help get rid of the accumulated tension/chemicals which build up in your muscles over time. Also most instructor-led routines involve breathing and meditation, which quiet both mind and body.

I didn't think it would necessarily work at first, LOL, but over the years my mind has been trained to respond to yoga techniques. For example, one instructor had count forward and backward from one to ten--with rhythmic pauses between numbers, during the meditation period at the end of class.

At first I thought it was a load of hooey...Until I got in a situation outside of class where I needed to exercise inner strength, so stayed by myself--in a quiet space, in the car--LOL--and did my yoga counting. To my surprise it worked!

To this day, if I'm panicked I can often calm myself by going physically to a quiet place, closing my eyes, and doing the yoga counting, because I think my brain/body have been conditioned to respond with relaxation.

I get super streesed from long days in the kitchen, I have really come to rely on this little cd - on my i-pod which i just pop in when I have 15 minutes to spare.
Just a thought.
Good luck -
Honey barbxxx

Yeah, the typical noise from the world is not enough to sustain me--if anything it's very draining.

I find that I do, over time, need to refill my tank with uplifting "programming," via books on tape, sermons, music, prayer, yoga, or what have you.

My Walkman has been in the back of the garage for the past couple of years (couldn't afford an iPod) and I suffered without it (though undoubtedly have developed other mental/emotional/social resources in its absence.) :wink: