what does working with others mean to you?

[janbear]

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Misselle
Devoted Member



Age: 29
Joined: 08 Dec 2005
Posts: 168
Location: Texas

Posted: Mon Jan 23, 2006 7:35 pm Post subject: Step 12 - what does working with others mean to you?


I am approaching step 12 (after almost 2 years in recovery) and I have always felt the most trepidation over step 12. What does it mean to work with others?

Do you have to make yourself available to sponsor? With my husband's issues and my crazy busy life, I don't have the time or emotional resources to sponsor at this point. I enjoy talking with and offering advice to the newbies on the board and f2f, but is that enough?

I am just curious to hear what step 12 means to you and how you personally choose to fulfill it.

[janbear]

peajaye
Moderator



Age: 49
Joined: 07 Dec 2005
Posts: 352
Location: Marietta, GA (atlanta)

Posted: Mon Jan 23, 2006 8:50 pm Post subject:


At the end of the traditions that my home group reads there is a statement that when anyone anywhere reaches out for help I want the hand of AA to be there and for that I am responsible. I read that tonight and it makes me queasy. I do not work well with wet drunks. Some people do.

I give of myself where I can. Since I have been off work I am able to do a little more than before. Knowing my limits is important because first and foremost I have to take care of myself.

For many years I never sponsored because no one ever asked me. I've got a few people that call me their sponsor now, but I am actively sponsoring only one. Often someone will ask and then I never hear a word from them. If someone else asked me right now, I would say no, my plate is full. I can give my number out but won't commit to sponsor.

At our last group conscience mtg we elected officers and now I am the group chairperson, which I thought only meant that I would chair the group conscience mtgs. It is also my job to interface with the landlords who are actually an AA clubhouse that is in the process of making undesireable changes. Soooo I seem to have bitten off more than I care to chew. With God's help I can do this.

Anyway Misselle, I don't even know if I answered your question, but that is what I am currently doing with my 12th step. For years, like I said all I did was help out at mtgs, chair mtgs, encourage people where I could.


_________________
To show other alcoholics precisely how we have recovered is the main purpose of this book. BB pg xiii (third edition)



free2bunme
Moderator



Age: 35
Joined: 06 Dec 2005
Posts: 1066
Location: atlanta, georgia

Posted: Mon Jan 23, 2006 11:12 pm Post subject:

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i also have a lot of trepidation about this step, but i have heard time and again that THIS is the step that keeps you sober. and that doing service work is the best way to God. there are lots of ways to do service work if you don't feel confortable sponsoring someone. for instance, i am considering volunteering for the local AA hotline on Saturdays.


_________________
I am the vine, ye are the branches: He that abideth in me, and I in him, the same bringeth forth much fruit: for without me ye can do nothing. John 15:5

He that getteth wisdom loveth his own soul: He that keepeth understanding shall find good. Proverbs 19:8

The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. Psalm 34:18



bluidkiti
Administrator



Age: 44
Joined: 01 Dec 2005
Posts: 7079


Posted: Tue Jan 24, 2006 4:46 am Post subject:

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I was sitting in a meeting a couple of years ago and heard this fellow share about sponsoring. He said he had tried to sponsor a few people but he just never seem to have the time to give them that he felt they need. He is a surgeon and works long hours. He talked to his sponsor about this and his sponsor told him that it was ok if he didn't sponsor anyone right now since he worked long hours and that maybe later on in life when his life was slower he may could sponsor someone then. He told him there were other ways he could be of service. If and when he had the chance, to share with others on how he has stayed sober, attend meetings and share his experience, strength and hope, help out at meetings - lots of ways to be of service. That helped me because with my 3 girls I stay busy and since they have gotten older, I am even busier. I have over the past few years sponsored a few temporarily until they could get a permanent sponsor. I do talk with others either f2f, online or the phone who are either seeking recovery or in recovery. Of course there is the site here where I can be of service. I have also helped out at meetings by helping to set up meetings and clean up afterwards and hung around after and talked to other newcomers. If a new person needed a recovery book, I would take them in the bookstore and see to it that they got what they needed and meeting schedules it they needed that and so on. There are many ways to be of service. Pray to God and seek guidance from Him as to what it is He would have you do.


_________________
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K.
"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
God says that each of us is worth loving.
We stay sober together - one day at a time!



Misselle
Devoted Member



Age: 29
Joined: 08 Dec 2005
Posts: 168
Location: Texas

Posted: Tue Jan 24, 2006 5:52 pm Post subject:

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Praying sounds like a good plan - God probably already has something in mind for me.

I am really glad to hear from everyone on this - I had hoped that I might be of service in other ways for right now, and it sound slike that really has been working for many of you. Maybe someday when I have more time (years) under my belt I will sponsor - even though I have been in recovery since May of 2004, I only have just over 6 months sober time at this point.

[janbear]

Very kewl post, sorry i missed it before, working with others like others shared can be done in so many ways, yes, sponsoring, helping the newcomer feel comfortable and welcome,helping prepare for a meeting, chairing meetings,cleaning up after meetings,giving rides, a while back i helped get someone to treatment, listening to 5th steps is an awesome experience, helping others online is rewarding as well, Giving back what was given me is key to me. Just as i love my f2f family, i love my cyberfamily as well. This isnt just a board to me this is about family helping family. And when we extend ourselves to others however our higher power wants for each of us, that is carrying the message in my opinion.

[admin]

For those like myself, who for whatever reason don't or can't go to f2f meetings anymore, online recovery is a lifeline for us with others in recovery. It is another way to fellowship with others in recovery, to be of help to those who are still suffering, to be of service, to carry the message.

I got my start in AA in an AA chatroom online. I am just giving back what has so freely been given me. :)

[janbear]

:D In some ways i am closer to my online family here at CyberRecovery

[dalin]

I agree with you Greg.
I try and remeber how screwed up and useless I felt
when I first got clean.
I tried alot of fellowships,but when I showed up at na meetings,and saw the way these
addicts treated newcomers.
I had an aa sponsor,still did untill after my first year clean,
but the way these addicts lovingly treated each other spoke to my heart.
These guys sort of showed me this deal.
I thought the steps were like homework.
I had done all 12 with an aa sponsor.
My first na sponsor got me to learn to slow down and live the steps.
I wouldnt trade either of those aproaches to the steps tho'.
Now I try hard to practice the 12th step principles in my actions.
One of the reasons I am doing the sponsorship section is to practice this.

[globabe]

After having a spiritual awakening as a result of the previous 11 steps, I began working on 12! This step for me is all of the steps with thier principals practiced on a daily basis. Then I am carrying the message in all of my affairs. I have blessed by being able to share at various levels of aa - my home group, intergroup, general service, conventions, and participating on various committtes in all. The responsibility pledge is what I live today, not just say at the end of meetings because if aa wasn't here for me I probably would be dead today instead of celebrating 15 years of sobriety, and for that I am so grateful. So for those who worked their 12th step before me, and were there for me when I came in the doors is why I now I live this step on a daily basis - in all aspects of my life. I give back what was so freely given to me wherever and whenever I can. Answering phones, speaking, chairing, sponsoring are all important parts of this whole - so do what you can to give back and you will find like I have - the more I gave the more I got! Thnaks for letting me share!! God Bless you! Gloria