Something I would like to share with you

[admin]

When I was around 13, I had gone to stay a few days with my step-sister during the Christmas Holidays. While at her house, R (my step-dad's brother-in-law) and a friend of his had come to visit my step-sister and her husband. My step-sister and her husband had 3 kids together. My step-sister, her husband, R, his friend and I were all outside. It was nearing dark so I whispered to my step-sister that I was going to go inside and go ahead and get my bath so I wouldn't be in the way of her bathing her kids later. I went in the house and got my bath. When I stepped out of the door of the bathroom to go to the bedroom I was using, R grabbed me in the hallway and kissed me putting his tongue in my mouth and his hands were going everywhere. I never saw him. He had to have been standing out in the hallway waiting for me. He then shoved me into the bedroom and forced me down on the bed and he was on top of me. I was screaming for help but he kept putting his hand over my mouth. Somehow I managed to hit him in the groin and he fell off of the bed and onto the floor. I jumped up off of the bed and ran outside, not saying anything to anyone. After R and his friend left, I told my step-sister and her husband what happened. Her husband was so angry over what had happened and said he wished I had said something while R was there.

That was over 30 years ago when that happened. My mom just told me recently that R is in jail under a million dollar bond for sexually abusing a 14 year old girl. This hasn't been long happened. He is in his 60's now. I don't know what will happen. I will try and let you know the outcome when I find out.

[free2bunme]

(((((((((Tammy ))))))) :8: :42: :195:

[janbear]

I hate this happened to you, Tammy, and to this other 14 yr. old. Abuse is alway a scarey thing to happen to any one, all of us can be set free as being victims, and not only are survivors but we can become thrivers in life. You, my dear sis i see as a thriver, allowing God to take you through to the other side. My heart aches for the young teen, my heart aches for you wishing i could be there with you. I love you and i am only a phone call away. My heart aches for all survivors of abuse.

[admin]

Thank you ((((Frannie & Jan))))

I talked to my mom yesterday and she said that he raped this 14 year old girl. She went to the hospital afterwards and there is evidence against him. The scene from many years ago kept replaying in my head yesterday of what happened to me. It was terrifying. It was only yesterday that I actually realized by writing this out that what he did to me was attempted rape. If I hadn't managed to hit him in the groin, I don't want to even imagine what might have happened. I didn't tell my mom about this until years later. There are others in the family who are speaking up about him and what he did to them over the years. His brother and son are just as sick. I had "run ins" with both of them when I was in my teens. His brother was married to another sister of my step-dad's. They are sick and need help and prayers.

[janbear]

:42: Tammy :42:

[admin]

Update: Mom said the bond was lowered to $65,000. She said that R and his brother put up the farm they inherited for the bond. So R has been released from jail. I don't know when the trial is yet. He could possibly get 8 years is what my mom said. I'll let you know when I get another update.

[clean42day]

((((Tammy)))) so sorry this has happened to you....there are never any words for this kind of trauma except that you didn't deserve it and God brought you through it to the loving person you are today. I am also sad to hear that he got the chance to do it again to another victim....I really wish they give him the full time he deserves.

in the meantime I pray that God surround you with healing and relief.

:195:

light and love

Gail

[admin]

Thank you ((((Gail))))

[fibiray]

Tammy I too am sorry this has happened to you and even more rocked that this guy got out of jail with a reduced bond. god bless you for your honesty and no doubt his contuppence will come to him one day.

Fi
xxx

[admin]

Thank you ((((fibiray)))).

I haven't heard any more about this. I will let you all know when I do.

[flickchic]

((((((((((((((Tammy)))))))))))),

sincere apologies for not having responded here before, I didn't feel i was able to without a degree of anger toward the perp.

I certainly feel for you, that would have been a very scary and traumatic experience and one that no doubt has left some internal scaring.I am sorry and sadened to know that you too were abused in this manner. Yes, these people are indeed very sick.

When I first read this I was triggered, then when you posted again re the bail being lessened it made me very very angry, that this man perped in the past and has done so again. I released that anger as it helps no-one, least of all you.

And through your sharing and my inital reactions I have come to realise that I need to be able to let go of reactions like those, as if I am to pursue my chosen path in counselling and community service it would not be helpful to anyone if I were of that frame of mind.

I am glad you were able to have the courage to reach out and share this with us Tammy for I understand that can be a very difficult step. I do get the impression that you have no self blame for this and that is so freeing....I pray I am correct, for your wellbeing. Please know that I too am here for you at any time and if you want to share yell out (really loudly but!!). I love and admire you and have deep respect for you and your journey Tammy.....God loves You very much and so do I.:206: :213:

[admin]

Thank you ((((felicity))))

No I don't have any blame. I was an innocent young girl - actually a tomboy who just happened to be pretty. He also caught me offguard. I didn't expect him to be standing outside of the bathroom door when I stepped out and then he just grabbed me. I have experienced alot of unwanted advances from males of all ages in my life. My last experience was at an AA meeting a few years ago. When I was leaving out the door with my sponsee this old man I knew, came up out of the blue and he grabbed me by the head and planted a firm kiss on my lips which made me sick to my stomach. He caught me offguard. I finally quit going to meetings after that because I just feel I don't have to put up with it anymore. If I can remove myself from a situation like that then I will. I am just sickened by the way some males are. No respect whatsoever for females.