Getting Unstuck -Step Six

[janbear]

Getting Unstuck -Step Six



Problems can translate into healthy challenges if we approach them with optimisim. We've already acknowledged that we're the ones who created the situation we find ourselves in. But we've also discovered that we have the courage and-hand in hand with our Higher Power-the ability to change negatives into positives.
The gap between how our lives are, and how we want them to be, creates tension. But tension is a two-way street. It can act as a catapult to thrust us into a more productive life pattern, or it can drag us back into the pit we're struggling to escape.
We have to recognize that until we cease trying to place the blame on people, places, or things; until we stop denying our responsibility; until we stop defending our reasons for past behaviour, we're hopelessly stuck.
If on the other hand, we look at what our denial and defensiveness are covering up-and what they are trying to tell us-we begin to see opportunities to turn those self-same liabilities into assets.

-Step by Step

[free2bunme]

We have to recognize that until we cease trying to place the blame on people, places, or things; until we stop denying our responsibility; until we stop defending our reasons for past behaviour, we're hopelessly stuck.

True

If on the other hand, we look at what our denial and defensiveness are covering up-and what they are trying to tell us-we begin to see opportunities to turn those self-same liabilities into assets.

What does this mean? I'm confused

[clean42day]

If on the other hand, we look at what our denial and defensiveness are covering up-and what they are trying to tell us-we begin to see opportunities to turn those self-same liabilities into assets.

We can't change and transform what we won't acknowledge. underneath ever character defect is a core emotion, need, or fear.....

for instance....I had many charater defects surrounding my relationships with men. those character defects protected me and served me for a very long time. it wasn't till I got up underneath the top layer of false dysfunction down into the core issue....which was childhood sexual abuse....that my behavior and my character defects made perfect sense.

We begin to see opportunities to turn those self-same liabilities into assets

The opportunity: was instead of denying my pain and fear of that core issue and denying how damaging it was.....I took the opportunity and looked at it like a chance to finally to the work heal. it became an opportunity towards more freedom from self - my wounded self.

The asset: it no longer has power in my life....the asset is a greater freedom to not act on issues of the past that are long gone and bring them into the present. another asset....is by doing the work to heal and coming full circle....now I can help others do the same concerning issues of sexual abuse. Another asset....is looking past other peoples character defects right down into the core issue that they are reacting from. What looks like anger on top....is really hurt underneath. What looks like aloofness...is really fear underneath. What looks like judgement - is really insecurty underneath. ect.

This new awareness becomes an asset because I don't react to other peoples top layer with my top layer.

It can act as a catapult to thrust us into a more productive life pattern

Today I consider experiencing being a victim of childhood sexual abuse and being a battered woman in domestic violence....and asset. How?....because by having those experiences I am in a better position to understand others and support thier process to heal also. my pain no longer blinds me to the pain of others.

I am going to post a chart that my sponsor gave me on step six....look at it and tell me what you think?

it might make this a little more clear.

light and love

Gail