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06-11-2006, 06:11 PM
The Traditions as They Apply to Our Singleness of Purpose
The following was a presentation given at the Northern New Jersey Intergroup
and NNJGS Area 44 Joint Day of Sharing, August 16, 2003.
Tradition One: Our common welfare should come first; personal recovery
depends upon A.A. unity.
A.A. is a "we", not an "I", program. When "we" place the good of A.A. ahead
of our own personal agendas and desires, A.A. can be better unified. We're
unified and bonded by our common problem of alcoholism with a common solution as
outlined in our basic text affectionately called "The Big Book". So what
happens when our unity is compromised or broken? How does this kind of thing happen?
As individuals, we are each responsible for placing the common welfare of
A.A. first. The good of A.A. must always be a first priority even if it means "I"
can't get what "I" want. What can we do to place the welfare of A.A. ahead of
our own?
* We need to identify ourselves simply as alcoholics...leaving our "other"
problems / addictions at the door. This even means not identifying ourselves as
drug addicts even if we have that respective addiction. We are not N.A. We're
A.A. The only identification that belongs here is that of being an alcoholic.
* Our sharing should be based on offering our experience, strength and hope
to the still-suffering alcoholic. In How it Works, we're told to disclose what
we used to be like, what happened (in terms of getting sober with the steps
1-9) and what we are like now (living in steps 10-12). We're to offer hope that
there is a way out of the alcoholic nightmare.
* An A.A. meeting should not be used as a dumping ground for all our personal
problems and "issues". These things belong with our sponsors, our network and
with appropriate professionals. We're here to offer hope and a solution to
the still-suffering alcoholic. When we dive into sharing whatever we want, we're
no longer bonded by a common problem. We are divided by our differences. So
where does this leave the alcoholic who is dying a miserable alcoholic death?
And, who is responsible when that alkie doesn't come back to A.A.? A lot of us
say they just didn't want it enough. But what's our part? When we don't take
responsibility for our common welfare to keep A.A. - A.A., everyone suffers.
Alcoholics die. And, Alcoholics Anonymous gets a little more watered down.
Tradition Two: For our group purpose there is but one ultimate authority-a
loving God as He may express Himself in our group conscience. Our leaders are
but trusted servants; they do not govern.
Alcoholics Anonymous is a fellowship that is supposed to be directed through
a loving God...not by individuals who want to run the show their own way. The
more we allow God to direct our actions through a group conscience, the more
we're moved out of "self" and our own wants and desires. When God is given the
opportunity to direct our actions, our singleness of purpose has a greater
chance of being carried out through loving, God-inspired actions. With our own
plans and designs set aside, God can better move our fellowship in the direction
of helping the still-suffering alcoholic...God moves us to carry out our
singleness of purpose.
Tradition Three: The only requirement for A.A. membership is a desire to stop
drinking.
Notice it doesn't state that we must identify ourselves as alcoholics; it
simply states we must have a desire to stop drinking. Also, notice it doesn't
state that the requirement for A.A. membership is to not drink. It states, "to
stop drinking". I've attended meetings where someone introduces him / herself as
having a desire not to drink. Well anyone, an alcoholic or NOT, can have a
desire not to drink. This does not mean they've met our requirement for
membership. I've known addicts who introduce themselves with "a desire not to drink"
as a way to qualify to attend a closed meeting. If an addict has been actively
drinking and has a desire to stop, they are more than welcome at a closed
meeting and indeed meet our requirement for membership. But if they haven't been
actively drinking, then as such, they can't have a desire to stop the drinking
that they're not doing. These individuals do not meet our requirement for
membership and are only welcome at our open meetings, to sit and listen. When an
individual does not live in the spirit of Tradition Three, it becomes about the
individual placing his / her own wants and desires ahead of the common
welfare of A.A. When a non-alcoholic uses an introduction like, I have a desire not
to drink or simply identify as an alcoholic because they think it's all the
same, this is a problem and it's wrong. They don't share in our common problem.
These individuals cannot honestly offer a solution to the still-suffering
alcoholic. ALCOHOLISM AND DRUG ADDICTION ARE NOT THE SAME. When this kind of thing
happens, our unity is seriously weakened. We no longer share in the same
common problem. In Chapter 7, Working With Others, it states, "Practical
experience shows that nothing will so much insure immunity from drinking as intensive
work with other alcoholics...[c]arry this message to other alcoholics! You can
help when no one else can." A non-alcoholic who uses A.A. to stay "clean", not
"sober", cannot carry the message to an alcoholic. They do not share a common
problem with the alkie nor do they share in a common experience. Our
singleness of purpose is completely lost. And, because of such selfish acts, our
precious fellowship withers away a little more. What happens when we, as members of
Alcoholics Anonymous, allow this kind of thing to continue because we're too
scared to stand up for the principle of this tradition out of fear of hurting
someone's feelings? We end up placing our own fears ahead of our singleness of
purpose. We end up being selfish in a selfless program. And contrary to what
many of us have heard at meetings, this is NOT a selfish program! Our primary
purpose is to stay sober and help other alcoholics to achieve sobriety... not
to have non-alcoholics, who just attend A.A. because they like our fellowship
better than the one they respectively belong in, help alcoholics achieve
sobriety. They can't and it doesn't work. Simply put...this is not A.A.
Tradition Four: Each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting
other groups or A.A. as a whole.
I've seen a lot of groups use this tradition to their advantage by leaving
off the latter part of "except in matters affecting other groups or A.A. as a
whole." To me, this is the most important part of this tradition... it reminds
me that I have to place the greater whole of A.A. before my or my group's own
wants and desires. Ideally, Alcoholics Anonymous should be guided by the spirit
and love of our Twelve Traditions. Tradition Four allows each group to have
its own variations and its own personality, but not when doing so conflicts
with our other Twelve Traditions. Tradition Four does not give permission to a
group to do whatever it pleases, so it can be a free-for-all. Again, the common
welfare of A.A. must come first. I've attended some closed meetings where
individuals who don't have a desire to stop drinking are allowed to be present and
participate. And, I've also heard these very groups use the explanation that
they are autonomous and can do what they want. But allowing individuals to
attend a closed meeting, who do not meet our requirement for membership,
definitely affects other groups and A.A. as a whole. How can it not??? The wrong
message is sent of what A.A. is and stands for, what closed meetings actually are
and what other groups may allow into their meetings. When we allow this kind of
thing, we confuse the individual about our singleness of purpose...or maybe
they don't even understand that we have one.
Tradition Five: Each group has but one primary purpose-to carry its message
to the alcoholic who still suffers.
Again, the group, the "we", comes before the individual, the "I". Our purpose
is to carry the message as it's outlined in our basic text. We aren't
supposed to offer up our own "mixed bag message" with our own personal opinions based
on our own personal agendas. The group's message to the still-suffering
alcoholic should be clearcut and taken from our basic text. Singleness of purpose
is also lost when we use A.A. as a social hangout, a gossiping circle, a place
to find a date, etc. Our primary purpose is to carry THE message to other
alcoholics and help them to achieve sobriety. We cannot successfully do this when
we place our own wants and desires ahead of what's best for A.A. Also, who is
the alcoholic who still suffers? Often times, when trying to identify this
person, we think of the newcomer who just walked through the door. But this
person can be a face we see often...an old-timer...a personal buddy...or someone
with whom I have a personal resentment. It doesn't matter who the person is. It
is our responsibility, it is MY responsibility, to carry THE message to ALL
suffering alcoholics and to help them achieve sobriety in the capacity I can.
Principles must always be placed before personalities.
Tradition Ten: Alcoholics Anonymous has no opinion on outside issues; hence
the A.A. name ought never be drawn into public controversy.
The sharing I've heard at A.A. meetings can get quite interesting. Many
times, I've seen A.A.s share their opinion under the guise of sharing their own
experience. How many times have we heard individuals make comments in meetings on
rehabs, the courts, the police, etc...most of the time out of resentment!
This kind of sharing has nothing to do with our common problem or common
solution...but more likely with our common character defects! Also, anything shared at
a meeting that does not relate to alcoholism is an OUTSIDE ISSUE...this
includes drugs! I'd say that in most meetings I've attended, there is almost always
someone who ends up sharing on outside issues. Nobody can ever speak for A.A.
as a whole, but a newcomer may not understand this. A newcomer may take the
personal opinions shared at a meeting as representing A.A. as a whole. And,
where does this leave the newcomer or the still-suffering alcoholic? Why do we
waste our time and energy sharing opinions when we should be helping the
suffering alcoholic? Opinions shared at meetings have nothing whatsoever to do with
our singleness of purpose, but more with our own self-will and selfishness! The
more we stay away from personal opinions, the more we safeguard ourselves
against public controversy. ALL of our energies and efforts need to be extremely
focused...Alcoholics Anonymous is a fellowship of men and women who share
their experience, strength and hope with each other that they may solve their
common problem and help others to recover from alcoholism. Without this, our
fellowship will ultimately destroy itself from the inside out. More and more
alcoholics will needlessly die and Alcoholics Anonymous will cease to exist. In
absolute love & service.
Stephanie G., D.C.M., District 9/Section 3 Leader
Northern New Jersey - Area 44
The following was a presentation given at the Northern New Jersey Intergroup
and NNJGS Area 44 Joint Day of Sharing, August 16, 2003.
Tradition One: Our common welfare should come first; personal recovery
depends upon A.A. unity.
A.A. is a "we", not an "I", program. When "we" place the good of A.A. ahead
of our own personal agendas and desires, A.A. can be better unified. We're
unified and bonded by our common problem of alcoholism with a common solution as
outlined in our basic text affectionately called "The Big Book". So what
happens when our unity is compromised or broken? How does this kind of thing happen?
As individuals, we are each responsible for placing the common welfare of
A.A. first. The good of A.A. must always be a first priority even if it means "I"
can't get what "I" want. What can we do to place the welfare of A.A. ahead of
our own?
* We need to identify ourselves simply as alcoholics...leaving our "other"
problems / addictions at the door. This even means not identifying ourselves as
drug addicts even if we have that respective addiction. We are not N.A. We're
A.A. The only identification that belongs here is that of being an alcoholic.
* Our sharing should be based on offering our experience, strength and hope
to the still-suffering alcoholic. In How it Works, we're told to disclose what
we used to be like, what happened (in terms of getting sober with the steps
1-9) and what we are like now (living in steps 10-12). We're to offer hope that
there is a way out of the alcoholic nightmare.
* An A.A. meeting should not be used as a dumping ground for all our personal
problems and "issues". These things belong with our sponsors, our network and
with appropriate professionals. We're here to offer hope and a solution to
the still-suffering alcoholic. When we dive into sharing whatever we want, we're
no longer bonded by a common problem. We are divided by our differences. So
where does this leave the alcoholic who is dying a miserable alcoholic death?
And, who is responsible when that alkie doesn't come back to A.A.? A lot of us
say they just didn't want it enough. But what's our part? When we don't take
responsibility for our common welfare to keep A.A. - A.A., everyone suffers.
Alcoholics die. And, Alcoholics Anonymous gets a little more watered down.
Tradition Two: For our group purpose there is but one ultimate authority-a
loving God as He may express Himself in our group conscience. Our leaders are
but trusted servants; they do not govern.
Alcoholics Anonymous is a fellowship that is supposed to be directed through
a loving God...not by individuals who want to run the show their own way. The
more we allow God to direct our actions through a group conscience, the more
we're moved out of "self" and our own wants and desires. When God is given the
opportunity to direct our actions, our singleness of purpose has a greater
chance of being carried out through loving, God-inspired actions. With our own
plans and designs set aside, God can better move our fellowship in the direction
of helping the still-suffering alcoholic...God moves us to carry out our
singleness of purpose.
Tradition Three: The only requirement for A.A. membership is a desire to stop
drinking.
Notice it doesn't state that we must identify ourselves as alcoholics; it
simply states we must have a desire to stop drinking. Also, notice it doesn't
state that the requirement for A.A. membership is to not drink. It states, "to
stop drinking". I've attended meetings where someone introduces him / herself as
having a desire not to drink. Well anyone, an alcoholic or NOT, can have a
desire not to drink. This does not mean they've met our requirement for
membership. I've known addicts who introduce themselves with "a desire not to drink"
as a way to qualify to attend a closed meeting. If an addict has been actively
drinking and has a desire to stop, they are more than welcome at a closed
meeting and indeed meet our requirement for membership. But if they haven't been
actively drinking, then as such, they can't have a desire to stop the drinking
that they're not doing. These individuals do not meet our requirement for
membership and are only welcome at our open meetings, to sit and listen. When an
individual does not live in the spirit of Tradition Three, it becomes about the
individual placing his / her own wants and desires ahead of the common
welfare of A.A. When a non-alcoholic uses an introduction like, I have a desire not
to drink or simply identify as an alcoholic because they think it's all the
same, this is a problem and it's wrong. They don't share in our common problem.
These individuals cannot honestly offer a solution to the still-suffering
alcoholic. ALCOHOLISM AND DRUG ADDICTION ARE NOT THE SAME. When this kind of thing
happens, our unity is seriously weakened. We no longer share in the same
common problem. In Chapter 7, Working With Others, it states, "Practical
experience shows that nothing will so much insure immunity from drinking as intensive
work with other alcoholics...[c]arry this message to other alcoholics! You can
help when no one else can." A non-alcoholic who uses A.A. to stay "clean", not
"sober", cannot carry the message to an alcoholic. They do not share a common
problem with the alkie nor do they share in a common experience. Our
singleness of purpose is completely lost. And, because of such selfish acts, our
precious fellowship withers away a little more. What happens when we, as members of
Alcoholics Anonymous, allow this kind of thing to continue because we're too
scared to stand up for the principle of this tradition out of fear of hurting
someone's feelings? We end up placing our own fears ahead of our singleness of
purpose. We end up being selfish in a selfless program. And contrary to what
many of us have heard at meetings, this is NOT a selfish program! Our primary
purpose is to stay sober and help other alcoholics to achieve sobriety... not
to have non-alcoholics, who just attend A.A. because they like our fellowship
better than the one they respectively belong in, help alcoholics achieve
sobriety. They can't and it doesn't work. Simply put...this is not A.A.
Tradition Four: Each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting
other groups or A.A. as a whole.
I've seen a lot of groups use this tradition to their advantage by leaving
off the latter part of "except in matters affecting other groups or A.A. as a
whole." To me, this is the most important part of this tradition... it reminds
me that I have to place the greater whole of A.A. before my or my group's own
wants and desires. Ideally, Alcoholics Anonymous should be guided by the spirit
and love of our Twelve Traditions. Tradition Four allows each group to have
its own variations and its own personality, but not when doing so conflicts
with our other Twelve Traditions. Tradition Four does not give permission to a
group to do whatever it pleases, so it can be a free-for-all. Again, the common
welfare of A.A. must come first. I've attended some closed meetings where
individuals who don't have a desire to stop drinking are allowed to be present and
participate. And, I've also heard these very groups use the explanation that
they are autonomous and can do what they want. But allowing individuals to
attend a closed meeting, who do not meet our requirement for membership,
definitely affects other groups and A.A. as a whole. How can it not??? The wrong
message is sent of what A.A. is and stands for, what closed meetings actually are
and what other groups may allow into their meetings. When we allow this kind of
thing, we confuse the individual about our singleness of purpose...or maybe
they don't even understand that we have one.
Tradition Five: Each group has but one primary purpose-to carry its message
to the alcoholic who still suffers.
Again, the group, the "we", comes before the individual, the "I". Our purpose
is to carry the message as it's outlined in our basic text. We aren't
supposed to offer up our own "mixed bag message" with our own personal opinions based
on our own personal agendas. The group's message to the still-suffering
alcoholic should be clearcut and taken from our basic text. Singleness of purpose
is also lost when we use A.A. as a social hangout, a gossiping circle, a place
to find a date, etc. Our primary purpose is to carry THE message to other
alcoholics and help them to achieve sobriety. We cannot successfully do this when
we place our own wants and desires ahead of what's best for A.A. Also, who is
the alcoholic who still suffers? Often times, when trying to identify this
person, we think of the newcomer who just walked through the door. But this
person can be a face we see often...an old-timer...a personal buddy...or someone
with whom I have a personal resentment. It doesn't matter who the person is. It
is our responsibility, it is MY responsibility, to carry THE message to ALL
suffering alcoholics and to help them achieve sobriety in the capacity I can.
Principles must always be placed before personalities.
Tradition Ten: Alcoholics Anonymous has no opinion on outside issues; hence
the A.A. name ought never be drawn into public controversy.
The sharing I've heard at A.A. meetings can get quite interesting. Many
times, I've seen A.A.s share their opinion under the guise of sharing their own
experience. How many times have we heard individuals make comments in meetings on
rehabs, the courts, the police, etc...most of the time out of resentment!
This kind of sharing has nothing to do with our common problem or common
solution...but more likely with our common character defects! Also, anything shared at
a meeting that does not relate to alcoholism is an OUTSIDE ISSUE...this
includes drugs! I'd say that in most meetings I've attended, there is almost always
someone who ends up sharing on outside issues. Nobody can ever speak for A.A.
as a whole, but a newcomer may not understand this. A newcomer may take the
personal opinions shared at a meeting as representing A.A. as a whole. And,
where does this leave the newcomer or the still-suffering alcoholic? Why do we
waste our time and energy sharing opinions when we should be helping the
suffering alcoholic? Opinions shared at meetings have nothing whatsoever to do with
our singleness of purpose, but more with our own self-will and selfishness! The
more we stay away from personal opinions, the more we safeguard ourselves
against public controversy. ALL of our energies and efforts need to be extremely
focused...Alcoholics Anonymous is a fellowship of men and women who share
their experience, strength and hope with each other that they may solve their
common problem and help others to recover from alcoholism. Without this, our
fellowship will ultimately destroy itself from the inside out. More and more
alcoholics will needlessly die and Alcoholics Anonymous will cease to exist. In
absolute love & service.
Stephanie G., D.C.M., District 9/Section 3 Leader
Northern New Jersey - Area 44