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Old 02-09-2012, 02:49 PM   #1
Keepq
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Icon18 The Anti-12 Steps (for the still active addict)for a laugh!!

The Anti-12 Steps
(for the still active addict)

1. I declared that I had complete and total control over my drug use and that I can completely manage my life and still use drugs.

2. Came to know that I needed no one and that drugs would help me maintain my happiness and sanity

3. Made a decision to harness the benefits (as I understand them) of any substance I chose to use.

4.Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of all others.

5.Admitted to no one, including myself, any of my wrongs, no matter how evident.

6. I became entirely ready to defend, excuse, and justify my actions, using personal attacks on others (if necessary), and to minimize any mistake I may make.

7. Boldly declare that I have no shortcomings (while secretly believing that anything bad I ever did could not be forgiven).

8. Made a list of all persons that had (or that I thought had) harmed me and searched for opportunities to "collect" on those debts.

9. Collected whatever I felt that I am "owed", whenever possible regardless of the fact that doing so may cause injury or pain to someone else.

10. Continued to take an inventory of others "wrongs" against me and promptly collected on them whenever possible.

11. Sought through experimentation, "expert opinions", partying, and the advice of my using friends, a better, stronger, and longer high. I search only for more knowledge of how and what to use, and the means to do so without consequences.

12. Having an enjoyable experience from the use of drugs, I tried to carry this message to other suffering sober people to lead them to practice these principals in all their affairs with me.

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Old 02-09-2012, 11:49 PM   #2
CD BUCKBERRY
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keepq , There funny but some may misinterpret them .
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Old 02-10-2012, 10:05 AM   #3
Rabbit
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Oh yeah. I lived by them!
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Old 03-14-2012, 05:50 AM   #4
mikethesmaller
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ha ha very good! :)
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Old 03-26-2012, 02:21 PM   #5
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I would also add to the term "addictive substance," and include "processes" and "people." The definition of addictions could then be expanded toward the larger picture of Relational Abuse (including CoD/CounterD, narcissism, etc.):



1. Sought through experimentation, "expert opinions", partying, and the advice of my using friends, a better, stronger, and longer high. I search only for more knowledge of how, what, or whom to use, and the means to do so without consequences.

3. Made a decision to harness the benefits (as I understand them) of any substance, process, or person I chose to use.

12. Having an enjoyable experience from the abuse of substances, processes, and/or people, I tried to carry this message to other suffering sober people to lead them to practice these principles in all their affairs with me.
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