:21:I need experience,strength and hope

[janbear]

My fathers cancer they think is spreading, no hope for him. He needs a miracle. I know God is there for me. I need you guys too. Do you have any experience, strength, and hope to share with me?

[peajaye]

Jan, I don't have any experience with cancer, but my dad was on hospice the last year and a half of his life. They called us home to say good bye to him over and over, but each time, he would rally back and regain his strength. He was permanently brain damaged in a car accident 17 years before he died. The Dr said he would never walk or talk again, but he did both. They don't always know the whole story. I am praying for you, your mom and dad.

[bry]

Best thing you can do is take care of yourself so you can be there for him. I didn't do that for my dad and the guilt is still with me.
Praying for you
Bry

[ErikaD981]

I don't have much experience with that but from what I've heard from others, just pray. God is with you. Pray for strength and acceptance. You and your family are in my prayers.

[admin]

((((Jan)))), We will have to continue to pray and put this in God's hands and continue to take life one day at a time - sometimes we may have to break that down into minutes and seconds. One of the things that helped me through the ordeal with my father in law recently was talking with others about it. You don't have to go through this alone, as you know God is with you and so are all of us here. I am only a phone call away. I am here for you 24/7 - call me, girl.

Bry also made a good point - take care of yourself so you can be there for your dad and mom. While your dad is in the hospital, he has others watching over him. You make sure you take care of you. Regardless, life still has to go on.

I love you and am here for you.

Love,
Tammy

[janbear]

Thank you guys. I appreciate you all.

[Prescott]

Hi Janbear, Hospice was my saving grace they we're there for Barbara and little did I know for me also. After working and training with Hospice for over a year I also learned of there way of letting go with "LOVE" Forgiveness for your father and yourself. In Barbara final moments I was able to tell her (she was in a coma so I have no way of knowing if she heard me) I loved her and it was alright to go "Suffer no more" It wasn't but a few minutes before she stopped breathing and there was a smile on her face. She passed in peace and with the knowing she was loved. It all happen so fast from the time I took her to the ER she went form being able to talk to a coma state in minutes so we never had a chance to say goodbye while she was awake so those moments at home alone we're so meaningful for me and hopefully for her. Letting go with love and forgiveness was as much for me as it was for her. Like Tammy said life goes on and we have to live with how we act and the #1 thing I learned form Hospice is "LOVE" With Love JOHN

[janbear]

Thank you, John, i was remembering some of your experience with Barb yesterday with hospice and i knew you trained with them as part of your own healing process. My mother doesnt feel it is time for hospice though his predicted life span makes me feel its time. I know there is always some chance he will live longer than expected from what others have shared, and my experience with my father-in-law. I talked with one friend this morning whose experience was the opposite. So i know it could go any direction. One of my dearest friends told me this morning to take things a day at a time. I have been having to break it down in shorter increments of time like suggested.

[Prescott]

Hi Janbear, It's never too early for Hospice. There care and support they offer
is a "GOD'S SEND" I realize to some people they feel like their giving up on their loved ones but it is just the oppisite. They recieve the best of care. At home care and support Nursing, doctor visits and housekeeping help. I send you my love and support what ever you decide. Love John

[Misselle]

I will be praying for you, Jan. How awful.

My mother is a breast cancer survivor, but we were very lucky in that it did not spread. So, while I can't claim to know exactly how you are feeling, I can imagine how painful this news must be for you. Please try to take care of yourself.