Old feelings, old memories, old tapes

[admin]

<b>bluidkiti</b> - Fri 07 Apr, 2006 8:45 am<br>
<b>Post subject: </b>Old feelings, old memories, old tapes<hr class="sep" width="95%">
I just went through some stuff this past week that stirred up old feelings, old memories. Any of you have that happen?
<br>

<br>
You are going along in life and then bam something happens and you are flung backwards and before you know it I guess you would say you can hear the old tapes playing in your head. It was rough as I went through this. Can't say for sure that I have come out on the other side yet but I have made progress. I shared with my mom and another friend of mine about what was going on and I am very glad I chose to vent to them. I listened to what they suggested and did as they suggested and I am very glad I did. See my mind at the time when I talked to them was not too great. I had the itty bitty ****************ty commitee up there in my head going at it. I didn't like my thoughts. I knew the right things to do and I really had to pray on it. I am glad I chose not to react on my feelings.
<br>

<br>
Anywhos - thanks for listening. Hopefully this made some sense to someone. LOL <img src="images/smiles/icon_lol.gif" alt="Laughing" border="0"> <hr>
<b>fibiray</b> - Fri 07 Apr, 2006 10:08 pm<br>
<b>Post subject: </b><hr class="sep" width="95%">
Tammy, welcome to the itty bitty ****************ty committee (he he) where I am also a founding member. It takes time for the past to fade sometimes a long time so don't put unreasonable expectations onto yourself. I still have past issues that i am dealing with even today. Whilst my childhood issues for the most part have faded there are still some things that affect me and it will take time for me to overcome and change. for example I still attract relationships in 3 and often unhealthy relationships. Speaking my truth can also be difficult. When I get irritable often I find it is because it is an echo of the past where I was scapegoated, or I have not spoken up or been heard.
<br>
I was also told in early recovery to not re-feel the feeling and to try and look at thing objectively. It sounds to me that your experience has occured to learn something that possibly you had not learnt about the particular experience when it happened. I have found with some past experiences that new lessons are being learnt from it years down the track. So long as your learning and you are not living in the past then I would not be too concerned about these experiences. Yes they do affect our moods at times but as time goes on the moods will subside. Hope this helps.

<br>

<br>
Yours sincerely
<br>
one moody little beaver from the itty bitty ****************ty committee <hr>
<b>Prescott</b> - Sat 08 Apr, 2006 8:09 am<br>
<b>Post subject: </b><hr class="sep" width="95%">
Hi Tammy, Old feeling's and the present continue to be part of my recovery (grief process). I find this has been the topic of the day for me.

<br>
fibiray has some pretty wise words above and I'm glad to have read them and yours. I'm doing so much better with these old feelings and it really helps me to share and also know I'm not alone in visiting the past. Lessons to learn and continued growth are at the heart of recovery. <hr>
<b>janbear</b> - Sat 08 Apr, 2006 10:10 am<br>
<b>Post subject: </b><hr class="sep" width="95%">
i have that same committee in my head at times as well. most of the time i can turn it over to God, but those times that i cannot thats when i depend on others to get me back on track. Recently the committe was in session in my head and i got my butt kicked and it got me back in the right direction.
<br>
I find for me that when i overreact to a present situation that i am in, i am reacting to my past. My past of sexual abuse is a big example in my own life. I can get triggered in a heartbeat by a smell or something said by somebody. The trick is staying in today.
<br>
For me i cant afford to let old feelings overwhelm me to the point that i go backwards.

<br>
I love you, Tammy. Hang in there. Act on your faith in God. This too shall pass.
<br>

<br>
"The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life and have it to the full." John 10:10 <hr>
<b>bluidkiti</b> - Sat 08 Apr, 2006 10:52 am<br>
<b>Post subject: </b><hr class="sep" width="95%">
Being tired and stressed doesn't help either. But hubby is coming home today and hopefully life will sort of get back to normal around here again.

<br>

<br>
Thanks everyone. I love you all so very much. It's great knwing we're not alone and to have God and loved ones today to lean on. <img src="images/smiles/grouphug1.gif" alt="hug" border="0">
<br>

<br>
Just had this song pop in my head:
<br>

<br>
Song: Lean On Me
<br>
Artist: Bill Withers
<br>

<br>
Sometimes, in our lives
<br>
We all have pain, we all have sorrow
<br>
But, if we are wise
<br>
We know that there's always tomorrow
<br>

<br>
Lean on me, when you're not strong
<br>
And I'll be your friend, I'll help you carry on
<br>
For, it won't be long
<br>

Til I'm gonna need somebody to lean on
<br>

<br>
Please swallow your pride
<br>
If I have things you need to borrow
<br>
For no one can fill
<br>
Those of your needs that you won't let show
<br>

<br>
You just call on me brother when you need a hand
<br>
We all need somebody to lean on

<br>
I just might have a problem that you'll understand
<br>
We all need somebody to lean on
<br>

<br>
Lean on me, when you're not strong
<br>
And I'll be your friend, I'll help you carry on
<br>
For, it won't be long
<br>
Til I'm gonna need somebody to lean on
<br>

<br>

You just call on me brother when you need a hand
<br>
We all need somebody to lean on
<br>
I just might have a problem that you'll understand
<br>
We all need somebody to lean on
<br>

<br>
If there is a load
<br>
You have to bear, that you can't carry
<br>
I'm right up the road
<br>
I'll share your load if you just call me

<br>
Call me if you need a friend
<br>
Call me ...
<br>
<a href="http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Nova/4203/leanonme.html" target="_blank">http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Nova/4203/leanonme.html</a>
<br>

<br>

<br>
Makes me emotional to read that. <hr>
<b>janbear</b> - Sat 08 Apr, 2006 11:36 am<br>

<b>Post subject: </b><hr class="sep" width="95%">
<div align="center"><div class="codetitle">Quote:</div><div class="quotediv">If there is a load
<br>
You have to bear, that you can't carry
<br>
I'm right up the road
<br>
I'll share your load if you just call me
<br>
Call me if you need a friend
<br>
Call me ... </div></div>

<br>
<img src="images/smiles/17.gif" alt="nod" border="0"> <hr>
<b>Doraine</b> - Sat 08 Apr, 2006 11:54 am<br>
<b>Post subject: </b>Re: Old feelings, old memories, old tapes<hr class="sep" width="95%">
<div align="center"><div class="codetitle">bluidkiti wrote:</div><div class="quotediv">I just went through some stuff this past week that stirred up old feelings, old memories. Any of you have that happen?
<br>

<br>
I had the itty bitty ****************ty commitee up there in my head going at it. I didn't like my thoughts. I knew the right things to do and I really had to pray on it. I am glad I chose not to react on my feelings.
<br>

<br>
<img src="images/smiles/icon_lol.gif" alt="Laughing" border="0"></div></div>
<br>
I had an experience this week that made me feel bad. I felt unworthy and doubted my motivations. But I too am glad I was saved from acting on those feelings. I talked about it and prayed for the person involved.I decided to go on retreat later this month. So something good came out of it. <hr>
<b>Clean42day</b> - Sun 09 Apr, 2006 10:45 pm<br>

<b>Post subject: </b><hr class="sep" width="95%">
<span style="color: blue;"><div align="center"><div class="codetitle">Quote:</div><div class="quotediv">When I get irritable often I find it is because it is an echo of the past where I was scapegoated, or I have not spoken up or been heard.
<br>
</div></div>
<br>

<br>
yep that's me.....parents denying my reality and trying to twist my perception to thier point of view. old old old stuff.....still sabatages my present state of mind....find myself reacting and fighting for my rights to my beliefs.
<br>

<br>
the end result back then was not feeling safe by the very people who were suppose to protect me....and today i feel the lack of self-protection as a result. the one good thing that I have realized.....is that "NO" I am not crazy......just still struggling to be true to myself.
<br>

<br>
kind of like a tug - of - war.</span>
<br>