I put my brother into rehab today

[Charlie G]

My sister called me two weeks ago,
On a Friday.
Our brother, G man….well, that’s a story by itself.
A concentrated version:

When My Dad married a lady named Monique, she already had G Man
Together, they had Kimmy; my 1/2 sister.
Same Dad,
Different Moms.
It gets better.
I have 5 brothers & sisters.
All but Cash; my little brother,
Would cause a probate judge pause.
My Mom had my oldest sister, Pixie (Not going to even try to tell you to stop laughing),
Before marrying my dad.
My ½ sister.
Together, they had Cash, and myself, before they divorced.
My full brother.
My other brother, Sean,
Whose death while drinking at a party in Las Vegas;
(He got drunk, passed out, got sick,
And suffocated on his own vomit),
Was the bottom that got me to give up, sell my house & go into treatment.
His death,
Saved my life.
Sean and I had the same Dad,
But his Mom was Kelly.
My ½ brother.
Kimmy, I already told you, was by my dad & a Monique.
So technically, I guess, G Man is my ½ sister’s, ½ brother.
My ¼ brother?
But, spiritually?
In my heart?
He is my brother.

Pixie lived with our Mom in North Carolina,
And Sean grew up in Japan, with his Mom (No, no…she was American!)
And me, Cash, Kimmy & G Man grew up in Miami Beach together.
Gary & I were the oldest.
We all lived in a beautiful house on Miami Beach.
On the water.
It was only two stories, but this house had an elevator!
We didn’t put it in, it was there when my dad bought the house.
As kids we used that elevator all the time;
When we were in trouble.
And G Man & I were always in trouble.
If we were close enough when Monique reached her limit.
G Man & I would jump into that elevator and take it half way up,
Or down,
And hit the emergency stop.
And we’d stay there until his Mom calmed down.
When I ran away from home one time,
G Man came with me at my request,
Helping me carry the bag of canned vegetables I stole out of the cupboards.
He was my partner when we’d push Cash outside in his underwear.
Laughing hysterically as he screamed at us to let him back in.
We grew apart though, as we grew up, and more so,
When our folks divorced;
Now seeing each other at one, or the other’s, family holiday dinners.
But, no matter what,
He is my brother.



So when my sister called me to ask if I would talk with her mom, I said sure.
When I called Monique, she told me that G Man had hit her and she didn’t know what to do.
I was shocked.
I always thought of him as the good one;
Job, wife, kids….
He had been a top Chef at a very expensive steak house in South Beach.
But for some reason, he quit.
He told me once that the hours were too much, but I know my brother;
He loved to cook.
He became a car salesman.
A top salesman.
Seems like he’s been practicing with his family.
His mom was at a loss and,
At the end of her rope.
They had gotten into an argument,
This was going to be another Christmas where she’d have to buy presents for his kids, because he was broke, again. She had told him.
And Gary snapped & hit her,
Or pushed her down;
Depending on who’s telling it.
His mom called the police, then Kimmy; asking her to have me call her.
“Please, Charles, can you help him?” she sobbed over the phone.
I told her I could talk to someone I knew at BARC; The Broward (Ft. Lauderdale area) Addiction Recovery Center, the county’s public detox/treatment facility.
“But there could be a wait.”
“He has insurance” His mom told me.
‘I’ll see what I can do.” I said, not having any idea what I was going to do.
I left my brother a message when I got his voice mail on his phone.
I told my brother that it was me,
And that I knew how he felt right then.
At that very moment;
When you hit your bottom;
When you have no one to turn to, nowhere to go, no way to get there,
And no one waiting for you.
When you are alone.
Sick,
Scared to your very being,
And you know,
You know,
That you are through.
With drugs, with alcohol, with…’the life’,
You don’t know what it is, that’s over – just…
It’s over.
And you’re tired,
So tired,
So empty,
And so utterly alone.

It is the lonliest feeling in the world.

“It doesn’t have to be like this, G Man.”
“I promise you, Bro.”
“You know what I was like a year & a half ago;
I was exactly where you are now,
“I can help you if you’ll let me.”
“If you’ll trust me.”
“Call me, Bro.”

Then I started making calls.
I knew this was his bottom & he would be calling me eventually.
He had to be as shocked at his actions as I was.
It wasn’t my brother.
I called a friend;
Who had been my boss,
At the detox center I had gone through 6 times in 8 years.
I actually went to work there after I finally gave up, sold my house,
And went into treatment.
My friend was an addict,
Who’d kicked cold turkey in a hospital.
Kicking cold turkey means kicking the walls for three days before you’re just miserable.
Afterwards, he knew there had to be a better way.
Now over 17 years clean,
He owns a detox center where you are medically detoxed;
With a drug cocktail (depending on what your detoxing from), that is slowly reduced every 4 hours.
Making it a LOT more comfortable.

Though, trust me, it’s still no picnic.

He told me if my brother called, to bring him in.
That way he would have a safe place to be for the week-end and we could figure something out.
“BUT Charlie, he has to be willing to go into treatment, or I’m not helping him.”
This is what his concern was;
That my brother would go into treatment.
Not the money;
I had told him the insurance G Man had – it was a really bad HMO – no good.
(What’d I expect from a car salesman?)
But that he would get the help he needed.

My brother called me at 5:30 am
I told him to come by & I would help him, but he had to do everything I said.
He told me he was on his way.

He was a mess.
He had obviously been on a run;
He stank, he was dirty & disheveled,
And he was broken.
It was the best, and worst, thing seeing him like that.
Worst; because I’d never seen him that way before, and my heart went out to him.
Best; because I could see he was through.
I took him to the detox center and got him checked in.

My friend /ex boss said there was one treatment center that might be able to take G Man’s insurance;
I had met the owner once, when It’s all in the JOURNEY was first starting.
But, I didn’t know him well enough to call him on a Saturday so,
I called a friend who knew the owner.
I explained about my brother.
She said she’d call him right after her noon meeting.
When she called me right back, I was surprised.
“Charlie!” She shouted. “I called Jim & was going to leave him a message to call me in an hour or so after my meeting, but he answered!”
On a Saturday.
“I told him about your brother and the insurance and that I needed to talk to him.”
“I explained that I was on my way to the Back on Track (A great clubhouse where my home group is) for a meeting and asked him if I could call him after.
“He told me he was already at the clubhouse waiting for the same meeting! He told me not to worry about the insurance right now, we’d figure something out, and we’d talk after the meeting!”
“I’ll let you know what he says as soon as I can.”

These are the kind of people I know today.
Ready, in an instant, no matter what,
To help another alcoholic or addict.
It still blows my mind.

She called me about an hour and a half later.
“Jim wants you to call him.” She said simply.
“What did he say?!?!” I asked;
Not simply.
“He said that he wants you to call him.”
Then she gave me his number.
I called Jim, the owner of Recovery First Treatment Center.
When he answered the phone, I introduced myself.
“I remember you, Charlie. The magazine is really looking good, congratulations.”
I thanked him and then told him about my brother and what kind of insurance he had.
“I don’t think that one is any good, but I can’t verify it until Monday.” He said. Then,
“Tell G Man and Ronnie (The owner of the detox center ), that I will send someone over to talk with him on Monday.”
“Don’t worry, Charlie.” He said, “We’ll figure something out for your brother.”

On Monday, I spoke with Jim again.
“The insurance will not work, Charlie.” He said. “But don’t worry,”
“I am going to give him a full scholarship. It won’t cost him anything.”
“Call your brother and tell him someone will pick him up in an hour or two.”
I was speechless.
I still am.
Understand where this man is coming from;
He doesn’t advertise in my magazine,
He didn’t tell me that we could work out a payment plan.
A friend of mine,
Who was a friend of his,
Asked for help.
And because he was able:
A bed was open,
He did.
I am humbled that God has put such people in my path.
To show me how it is done.
Should be done.
By everybody.

If your new in recovery, think about this for a moment.
Would your friends,
(That word doesn’t even come close to what I know a friend to be today.)
Would the people you ran with,
Hung with,
Partied with,
Go out of their way,
So far out of their way,
To help you if you asked?
If it was convenient; sure.
I would have.
But if it was not?
Convenient?
If the flow was low,
Really low.
Only enough for one hit,
Drink,
Snort,
Or pill,
To stop the sickness,
And you were sick & they were close.
Real close.
Would they?
Not think of themselves to help you?
Would you?
Honestly?
I wouldn’t have.
Neither would have my ‘friends.’
After doing my 12 steps, something happened to me.
I started to realize,
To know,
That there is a God and He has a purpose,
A plan,
For each of us.
And that when we get that conscious contact with God,
We start to realize that ALL of us, are of God.
And are here to love each other.
And the most incredible thing?
That still blows my mind?
When you do try to help someone,
Think:
What can I do for this person,
Instead of,
What can I get from this person.
And amazing things start to happen.
I spoke with my brother the other day,
He was happy!
Hopeful.
So glad for a second chance.
His mom called me;
She was so happy,
Hopeful.
Amazing.
peace

[thereishope]

Wow charlie that is wonderful. GODS grace and mercy and love is just overflowing in your and you brothers lives. I will keep both of you lifted up in prayer