Family Meals Together

[admin]

FAMILY MEALS TOGETHER

A recent report from the United States claims that children who were expected to sit down with the rest of the family at meal times, and who were encouraged to talk at the table, were doing better at school, had higher self-esteem, better social competence, and had better prospects of getting a job.

This report confirms a study conducted 25 years ago in Melbourne, 'Talk Up at the Table'. The author, Don Edgar, foundation director of the Australian Institute of Family Studies (EQ Australia, Issue 1, Autumn 1998) had been looking for the correlates of adolescent competence: which kids with what sorts of parents were most likely to do well. He found that on almost every outcome measure - school results, self esteem, social competence, optimism versus pessimism, good parent-child relationships, an expectation of later success in life - the kids (whether rich or poor) who were allowed to chatter and exchange ideas at meal times scored significantly higher than those who were told to shut up and eat their meals.

At the time, he interpreted the meal talk factor as illustrative of an openness on the part of parents to the free expression of ideas, mutual respect within the family, and warmth and structure combining to give children a sense of place and security in their lives. The new US study renews his faith in the efficacy of eating together and letting the meal talk flow. It may be noisy, argumentative and hard to manage, with parents and young people working different hours, but its outcomes are worth the trouble.

From A Canopy of Stars: Some Reflections for the Journey

[Chance]

That is very interesting!

When growing up, I don't know about anyone else, but we were basically told to be quiet during the meal time. Of course, my parents also said that kids were suppose to be seen not heard. Which is how we lived our lives, except most of the time we were not suppose to be seen either. LOL

Thanks for the information

[admin]

Originally Posted by Chance

That is very interesting!

When growing up, I don't know about anyone else, but we were basically told to be quiet during the meal time. Of course, my parents also said that kids were suppose to be seen not heard. Which is how we lived our lives, except most of the time we were not suppose to be seen either. LOL

Thanks for the information

Yeah Chance, that was pretty much how it was in my house with my dad and then my step-dad.

[nobenzo]

We had no meals together, ever. Parents divorced...so it goes, but husbands side did eat together, morning and evening meals. He is insistant that we at least eat dinner together and he eats all food at table (I cheat and eat in front of tv:( Try to keep kids at table w/daily food, but challenging. It seems as if meals together bring continuity and a sense of belonging to group. It takes time and effort, but does reap great rewards.
School conference friday w/twin sons (13) teachers and not a negative word about either and even told they were delightful! Thats a blessing for a mother who took whole family thru w/ds last school year! By Gods grace we've still held on to some goodness.

blessings
amanda

[annalittlebit]

Well---I know there was a time when our family meals were good but my 1st thoughts go back to utter chaos at the dinner table--It was always quiet--but chaos just the same--My Dad would sit at one end of the table with his pitcher of martinis and by the end of the meal he would be passed out in his chair---At the other end of the table sat my Mom--I don't recall her ever having a drink there--she was already drunk--And if we could get thru the meal without her passing out onto the floor I'd consider it a Good Night---I'm very Grateful that That Was Then!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[annalittlebit]

I was thinking about what I typed here yesterday and the fact that, that is where my first thoughts were lets me know that I still have alot of work to do about those Past issues-------On the other side of that, when our kids were growing up our Family Dinners were every night and we All talked from start to finish-----We would share about our day and I recall alot of laughing goin on-----I Loved Those Times and we still do it now whenever we have the chance------Thank God For My Family!!!!!!!!!!!