Daily Recovery Readings - 7/17

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Daily Reflections

SURRENDER AND SELF-EXAMINATION

My stability came out of trying to give, not out of demanding that I receive. Thus I think it can work out with emotional sobriety. If we examine every disturbance we have, great or small, we will find at the root of it some unhealthy dependency and its consequent unhealthy demand. Let us, with God's help, continually surrender these hobbling demands. Then we can be set free to live and love; we may then be able to Twelfth Step ourselves and others into emotional sobriety.
THE LANGUAGE OF THE HEART, p. 238

Years of dependency on alcohol as a chemical mood-changer deprived me of the capability to interact emotionally with my fellows. I thought I had to be self-sufficient, self-reliant, and self-motivated in a world of unreliable people. Finally I lost my self-respect and was left with dependency, lacking any ability to trust myself or to believe in anything. Surrender and self-examination while sharing with newcomers helped me to ask humbly for help.

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Twenty-Four Hours A Day

A.A. Thought For The Day

The new life of sobriety that we are learning to live in A.A. is slowly
growing on us and we are beginning to get some of that deep peace
of mind and serenity that we never thought were possible. At first we
may have doubted that this could happen to us, but after any
considerable length of time in A.A., looking at the happy faces
around us, we know that somehow it is happening to us . In
fact, it cannot help happening to anyone who takes the
A.A. program seriously day by day. Can I see my own happiness
reflected in the faces of others?

Meditation for the Day

God does not withhold His presence from you. He does not refuse to
reveal more of His truth to you. He does not hold back His spirit from
you. He does not withhold the strength that you need. His presence,
His truth, His spirit, His strength are always immediately available to
you, whenever you are fully willing to receive them. But they may be
blocked off by selfishness, intellectual pride, fear, greed, and
materialism. We must try to get rid of these blocks and let God's
spirit come in.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may remove all blocks that are keeping me from God. I
pray that I may let God come into my life with power.

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As Bill Sees It

A.A.--the Lodestar, p. 147

We can be grateful for every agency or method that tries to solve the
problem of alcoholism--whether of medicine, religion, education, or
research. We can be open-minded toward all such efforts and we can
be sympathetic when the ill-advised ones fail. We can remember that
A.A. itself ran for years on "trial and error."

As individuals, we can and should work with those that promise
success--even a little success.

<< << << >> >> >>

Every one of the pioneers in the total field of alcoholism will
generously say that had it not been for the living proof of recovery in
A.A., they could not have gone on. A.A. was the lodestar of hope and
help that kept them at it.

Grapevine, March 1958

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Walk In Dry Places

We never arrive
Finding Happiness.
We delude ourselves if we believe that our happiness and well-being will come when we reach a certain goal. Whatever happiness and well-being we obtain must come through the process of living in ordinary, everyday situations.
If we observe carefully, we'll find lots of happy people who are in situations or work that we might consider unpleasant. It is not the work or situation that creates happiness and fulfillment. What counts is the ATTITUDE toward it.
Those of us in 12 Step programs should have special insight into the issue of happiness. We tried to find it, here and now, in false ways. But it is available to us, here and now, in ordinary living.
I'll be happy today in knowing that I'm blessed with the ordinary tasks of life.

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Keep It Simple

Nothing in life is to be feared. It is only to be understood.---Marie Curie
We have many sides, some good, and some bad. Maybe we're afraid to see our faults. But we don't need to be afraid. After all, we need to know our dark side before we can change it. When we see ourselves clearly, we can stop our dark side from causing trouble.
When we shine light on our fears and secrets, we'll begin to feel better about ourselves. We'll feel more safe about sharing our worries. The more honest we are with ourselves and others, the better and stronger we become. The goodness and love in us will blossom. We have a Higher Power and a program to help us.
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me be brave enough to see myself clearly. Gently teach me to see who I really am. Help me know enough to stay sober today.
Action for the Day: Today, I'll look myself in the eyes. I'll spend two minutes looking into my eyes in a mirror. I'll talk to my sponsor about what I see.

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Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition

My Chance To Live

A.A. gave this teenager the tools to climb out of her dark abyss of despair.

I came through the doors of Alcoholics Anonymous at age seventeen, a walking contradiction. On the outside, I was the portrait of a rebellious teenager, with miles of attitude to spare. On the inside, I was suicidal, bloodied, and beaten. My stride spoke of a confidence I didn't feel. My dress was that of a street-tough kid you didn't want to mess with. Inside I was trembling with fear that someone would see through my defenses to the real me.

p. 309

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Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions

Tradition Three - "The only requirement for A.A. membership is a desire to stop drinking."

In a neighboring state, Ed had holed up in a cheap hotel. After all his pleas for help had been rebuffed, these words rang in his fevered mind. "They have deserted me. I have been deserted by my own kind. This is the end . . . Nothing is left." As he tossed on his bed, his hand brushed the bureau near by, touching a book. Opening the book, he read. It was a Gideon Bible. Ed never confided any more of what he saw and felt in that hotel room. It was the year 1938. He hasn't had a drink since.

pp. 144-145

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With love and patience, nothing is impossible.
--Daisaku Ikeda

This is the way of peace. Overcome evil with good. Falsehood with truth, And hatred with love.
--Peace Pilgrim

"Better keep yourself clean and bright; you are the window through which you must see the world."
--George Bernard Shaw

The purpose of man is in action not thought.
--Thomas Carlyle

Thanks, but I won't need your help today.
--GOD

To attain Knowledge, add things every day. To attain Wisdom, remove things every day.
--Lao Tzu

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Father Leo's Daily Meditation

NEGATIVITY

"My life has been nothing but a
failure."
--Claude Monet

I can identify with Claude Monet because for years I considered myself a complete failure. For years I wallowed on my pity-pot until it became too painful. Whatever the "pay-off" was in the previous years had dried up, and I was left with a rock bottom pain that forced me to consider the alternative: I needed to set about doing something to change things!

Astounding! Impossible! How could this ever be? I was forever to be a victim of alcoholism. "Not so." I heard a voice of hope from a recovering alcoholic who had made the change. Slowly I took small steps towards recovery and self-esteem.

I am a failure so long as I consider myself a failure. I am what I create in my life. God requires my cooperation to make miracles in my life. My decision to listen to those who had achieved sobriety provided the seeds for my recovery today. I wonder if Claude Monet was an alcoholic who never heard the words of hope?

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Jesus said, "I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full."
John 10:10b

If you do not forgive, neither will your Father in heaven forgive your trespasses.
Mark 11:26

God's foolishness is wiser than human wisdom, and God's weakness is stronger than human strength.
1 Corinthians 1:25

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Daily Inspiration

More strength is found in the ability to be flexible than in stubborn determination. Lord, when life makes extra demands on me, guide me and help me adapt easily to the necessary changes for the best results.

Worse than being a quitter is the one who is afraid to begin. Lord, grant me the courage to believe in myself and the ability to focus on what I can do, not what I can't do.

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You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
When you feel rejected, start accepting yourself, and then go out and accept someone. --Sondra Ray
There was once a mother who felt rejected when her children grew up and needed to separate from her. She felt hurt when they pushed her away and no longer wanted all the love and caring that she wanted to give them. She thought, What's wrong with me?
Encouraged by her friends, she began to ask herself another question: What's right with me? The more answers she found to that question, the better she liked herself. The better she liked herself, the more she was able to see her children's need to separate from her as their own natural and healthy urge for independence, and not the result of her shortcomings.
Our good points may seem undesirable to others, but that's not our fault. Sometimes, too much of a good thing can be inappropriate, but that doesn't make it bad.
What's right with me today?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
I loafe and invite my soul, I lean and loafe at my ease observing a spear of summer grass. --Walt Whitman
How foreign the thought is to many men that we might make progress by loafing. Yet we probably have experienced it. We have felt more in tune with ourselves after taking a break. After an especially relaxing weekend we feel more alive or clearer about ourselves. At those times we have invited our soul and have been rejuvenated.
Centuries of spiritual practice from different ideologies have taught the need for quiet relaxation in some form to invite the soul. Some have practiced a Sabbath day each week, others a time of prayer every day - even several times a day - others have practiced a daily period of deep meditation. Simply a period of loafing, with no particular goal in mind, may invite conscious contact with our Higher Power.
I pray for the ability to set aside my busy pace of life, my worrying and fretting, my "take charge" attitude for a period of time today.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
The problem is not merely one of woman and career, woman and the home, woman and independence. It is more basically: how to remain whole in the midst of the distractions of life; how to remain balanced, no matter what centrifugal forces tend to pull one off center; how to remain strong, no matter what shocks come in at the periphery and tend to crack the hub of the wheel. --Anne Morrow Lindbergh
Before getting into this recovery program, many of us didn't cope with life's distractions except with the help of our addiction. We had no sense of wholeness and were constantly bouncing from one crisis to another. We may still feel pulled. The crises may still trip us up. But we have a center now that we are beginning to understand and rely upon. That center is our spiritual selves.
Slowing down, going within to our center, listening to the message therein, unravels our problem, smooths the waves of the storm. The strength to go forward awaits us.
We can absorb the shocks that "crack the hub of the wheel" and be enriched by them. Each moment we are weaving our tapestry of life. Each experience colors our design. Our pain and sorrow and joy give the depth that one-day will move us to say, "I see, I understand."
I will be grateful for the experiences today that give my tapestry its beauty.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Love, in Words and Actions
Many of us have confused notions about what it means to be loved and cared about.
Many of us were loved and cared for by people who had discrepancies between what they said and did.
We may have had a mother or father who said, "I love you" to us, and then abandoned or neglected us, giving us confused ideas about love. Thus that pattern feels like love - the only love we knew.
Some of us may have been cared for by people who provided for our needs and said they loved us, but simultaneously abused or mistreated us. That, then, becomes our idea of love.
Some of us many have lived in emotionally sterile environments, where people said they loved us, but no feelings or nurturing were available. That may have become our idea of love.
We may learn to love others or ourselves the way we have been loved, or we may let others love us the way we have been loved, whether or not that feels good. It's time to let our needs be met in ways that actually work. Unhealthy love may meet some surface needs, but not our need to be loved.
We can come to expect congruency in behavior from others. We can diminish the impact of words alone and insist that behavior and words match.
We can find the courage, when appropriate, to confront discrepancies in words and actions - not to shame, blame, or find fault, but to help us stay in touch with reality and with our needs.
We can give and receive love where behavior matches one's words. We deserve to receive and give the best that love has to offer.
Today, I will be open to giving and receiving the healthiest love possible. I will watch for discrepancies between words and behaviors that confuse me and make me feel crazy. When that happens, I will understand that I am not crazy; I am in the midst of a discrepancy.


God gives me all the answers I need at the right time. Today I trust that it is okay not to know everything and that I will know when the time is right. --Ruth Fishel

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Using Our "Using Dreams"

"Do we fully accept the fact that our every attempt to stop using or to control our using failed?"
Basic Text, p. 18

The room is dark. Your forehead is bathed in cold sweat. Your heart is racing. You open your eyes, sure that you've just blown your clean time. You've had a "using dream", and it was just like being there-the people, the places, the routine, the sick feeling in your stomach, everything. It takes a few moments to realize it was just a nightmare, that it didn't actually happen. Slowly, you settle down and return to sleep.

The next morning is the time to examine what really happened the night before. You didn't use last night - but how close are you to using today? Do you have any illusions about your ability to control your using? Do you know, without a doubt, what would happen once you took the first drug? What stands between you and a real, live relapse? How strong is your program? Your relationships with your sponsor, your home group, and your Higher Power?

Using dreams don't necessarily indicate a hole in our program; for a drug addict, there's nothing more natural than to dream of using drugs. Some of us think of using dreams as gifts from our Higher Power, vividly reminding us of the insanity of active addiction and encouraging us to strengthen our recovery. Seen in that light, we can be grateful for using dreams. Frightening as they are, they can prove to be great blessings - if we use them to reinforce our recovery.

Just for today: I will examine my personal program. I will talk with my sponsor about what I find, and seek ways to strengthen my recovery.
pg. 207

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Wisdom for Today
Since coming into the program, my whole concept of what friendship means has changed dramatically. I thought that I was surrounded by a large group of friends when I was drinking and using drugs, but nothing could be farther from the truth. Oh, I had plenty of acquaintances, but none were truly my friends. I had party pals, and I had bar buddies, but I did not understand the concept of friendship until I had people who accepted me for who I was. I did not understand friendship until I had people who were willing to sit with me through the long and painful nights of early recovery, simply to help me get through one more day.
No I didn't understand friendship until I had real friends who would be honest with me and tell me the truth about myself. I didn't understand real friendship until I understood that these individuals would stand by me, and I knew in my heart they could be trusted. In my active addiction I thought that friends were people that I could use to get what I wanted. Now friends are people I can help and who can help me in return. They have taught me everything they know about how to live a better life and to be a better person. I know that with my friends I do not need to hold back. I can simply turn to them and ask for help and know that it will be there. I also know that if they need help, I will be there for them. This is what the program has taught me. Do I now have true friends? Am I willing to be a friend in return?
Meditations for the Heart
Recovery trains us to develop virtues. Patience is but one of these. Patience is often a real struggle for many of us because we became so used to instant gratification in our addiction. One quick fix, and we had everything we wanted, or so we thought. But recovery teaches us patience. We learn that we must do the work if we are to accomplish the goal. Nothing worth having comes easy, and this is true with patience as well. We learn to put off our need for immediate satisfaction and superficial reward in order to gain the real value in recovery. Slowly and methodically we take each step and thoroughly work each requirement to find the value behind the work. We learn to live in God's time and not our own. We discover that as long as we are willing to be patient, God will supply the answers we seek in His time and when we need them. Just because we want something now does not mean that we are yet ready. God knows this and will give us His answers in His time. Am I discovering what it means to be patient?
Petitions to my Higher Power
God,
Life is filled with many twists and turns, but You have provided me with friends I can rely on to help me along the way. Give me the wisdom to give back this friendship to any who need it. Let me this day practice patience and move at Your pace. Let me not rush to accomplish anything without first talking with You, God.
Amen.

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You are reading from the book Food for Thought.

The Narrow Path

Abstinence is the narrow path that leads out of the swamp of compulsive overeating. If we allow ourselves to deviate from the path, we immediately put ourselves on slippery ground and run the risk of falling into a bog of quicksand.

The longer we maintain firm abstinence, the more sure our steps become as we walk away from the crippling effects of our disease. It is so much easier to stay on the narrow path than to slip off and have to find it again. Without abstinence, we compulsive overeaters are lost.

If abstinence is not the most important thing in our lives, then food becomes our number one priority, and we gradually destroy ourselves.

Guide my steps, I pray, on the narrow path of abstinence.