Recovering again

[Aprilskyzz]

Hello everyone,

My name is April and I am an addict. I has seven years clean when I recently relapsed for the past year.

I loved living the clean life and never knew how precious it really is. I suffer from migraine headaches and have seen many doctors with no relief. I finally starting going to a pain clinic. Yeah a pain clinic. What was I thinking?

I knew that I would be prescribed pain meds but I thought I could handle it. At first, all was well. I would take less then what was prescribed but as time went on, the more I would take. Before you know it, I am looking around for more spending money I do not have. Lying to my loved ones. Staying to myself. I lost so much weight and look horrible. This lasted for about one year until just 9 days ago when I came clean to my boyfriend and asked him for help. It was the scariest thing for me to do because he told me a long time ago, that the only reason he would leave me is if I were back on drugs. I was so sick though. I could not keep going on so I took the chance and told him and he is still here with me.

I just went through hell for the past eight days detoxing. My body was so mad at me. My mind is pretty stable right now, but that's because I have been communicating with others in NA. I do alot of it online, but I plan on going to more meetings.

Just recently, in the past three months, I changed jobs. I bettered myself in my career but I lost the last week of work home sick which does not look very well in your probation period of a new job. I was supposed to get promoted tomorrow, but not sure if this meeting is still going to happen since I was out of work all last week. If not, I will prove myself again and maybe meet next month. The important thing right now is that I am clean.

Thanks for listening everyone. It always feels good to share.

[Peggyannvt]

Hi April,

Glad you are back working a program and glad you are here


Peggyann

[janbear]

Hi April, so glad you made it back I do know what it is like to be clean and sober for a few years and then relapse. I had 6 and a half years before my last relapse, it really jarred me and i began living the program in a way i never did before. I am grateful for each day i recieve staying clean and sober through NA and AA. My God sustains me in a way that i didnt know was possible.
Please make yourself at home and look around the board. I look forward to getting to know you better.

[peajaye]

Glad you made it back. Took a lot of courage to tell your boyfriend the risk involved in that plus taking the necessary time off the job. I look forward to your posts. Keep coming back.

[admin]

(((April))), Glad you are back. Your post sure reminded me of how I felt when I went out in 2000 for a few months. I, too, realized how precious sobriety was during that time. The most important thing is you are back and clean. Sounds like you are doing the right things to help yourself. Please feel free to continue to share with us here on the board. We also have an Online Journals/Diaries forum here on the board that some of us use in our recovery. Feel free to start yourself a journal there. I look forward to getting to know you better. Keep coming back.

Love,
Tammy

[snugsnug]

You are a blesing to me. You are very blesed to have someone in your life that will help you.

It works!

[Aprilskyzz]

Thanks for all the replies. It really helps knowing that there is support out there. Still trying to learn how to navigate this site lol.

Did not sleep too well last night, but that goes with the process of coming clean. Could be worse so not complaining.

Today's the day to find out if I am still getting promoted. I am very nervous, but I will take it as it comes. Still clean. That's what matters most.

Will keep you all updated later on today when I come home from work. Wish me luck. April

[zoomie]

((((((((((((((April)))))))))) good luck with your promotion and a big congrats on getting clean!

[Aprilskyzz]

Just came home really quick to let everyone know that I got my promotion today yeah. Talk to you all again soon.

[free2bunme]

Aprilskyzz --- Congratulations on your promotion, and much more important, congratulations on coming clean and getting back into recovery! I'm so happy for you that you retained your NA connections - that will surely be a big help to you in getting through the tough spots. I feel for you, early recovery is no fun. It will get better, as you know. Just hang in there, and don't use, no matter what.
Your friend,
Frannie