ALL ALONE AND IN LOVE WITH A HEROIN ADDICT - Cyber Recovery Social Network Forums

girlmagik · 07-22-2006, 04:21 PM

HELLO, my name is Robin and im in love with a heroin addict. Its been one whole month of knowing, and ive been miserable ever since.
He claims he loves me and he wants to stop, but yet im sitting in the house because he has taken my car and has been gone now for over 48hrs. Im fighting with my sister over reporting my car stolen, but i keep holding onto that false hope that he will return and everything will be ok
I dont know how to deal with this, he entered a detox program and left after 4days, im not an addict, but i know that is not long enough.
I love him, i do, so much, but im not healthy with him, im jeopardizing my job, my family doesnt talk to me, im losing my friends, and most of all i feel like ive lost him, help! i dont know what to do.

Doraine · 07-22-2006, 06:40 PM

Hi Robin and welcome. It sounds like your life has become unmanageable due your involvement with an addict. Check out Alanon or Naranon. You can get help from women who have been where you are.
My ex-husband abused drugs and alcohol. I made the decision to divorce after I went to Alanon. The addict has to want help you can't get anyone clean. You're powerless over his addiction.No one could get me sober either I had to want help. Now I'm sober awhile but it took a long time before I asked for help. Good luck.

*zoomie* · 07-23-2006, 12:48 AM

Just wanted to say hi and welcome. I'm so sorry your going through all that you are going through. There are good suggestions up above. (((((((((Huggys))))))))

girlmagik · 07-23-2006, 04:02 AM

thank you so much to all who have replied, your thoughts and suggestions are much appreciated. I look forward to many more conversations here.

*janbear* · 07-23-2006, 05:34 AM

Hi Robin, Welcome to CyberRecovery. Please make yourself at home here and look around the board. Like others suggested you might check out going to Alanon or Naranon meetings in your area, but please continue to come here and share with us.

*Prescott* · 07-23-2006, 11:15 AM

Hi Robin, Welcome to our group. Look forward to getting to know you. Keep coming back.

free2bunme · 07-23-2006, 04:50 PM

Welcome Robin!
So glad that you are here.
Good for you for reaching out for help.
If you are going to be in a relationship with a using addict, you are wise to find out as much about addiction as you can, so that you can make an informed decision about what the best thing to do for yourself is. Others have suggested al-anon or nar-anon meetings. I echo that ... think it is a great idea. One, you will get the support you need and will have a fellowship with other people in similar situations. Two, you will get the information you need about how addiction works. Unfortunately, only your boyfriend can make the decision to stop using heroin -- you can't make him, much as you would like to think you can.
Keep coming back and sharing. Praying for you.
Love,
Frannie, clean addict since 8/20/05

*admin* · 07-24-2006, 08:36 AM

Hi Robin, You are not alone anymore. Glad to have you join us here. We also have a forum on the board here for Families and Friends Of Alcoholics/Addicts - feel free to check that out when you get a chance. Please feel free to also continue to come here and share with us. We are here for you.

Love,
Tammy

DonnyB · 07-24-2006, 12:49 PM

Greetings Robin-
Hang in there. I think people have given you good advise. The one piece that I would repeat over and over again would be to attend an alanon meeting. I think you will feel wonderfully supported and get some help sorting things out. Keep coming back here, there is a lot of support and the people are incredibly caring and helpful. Best of luck!
Donny B

07-22-2006, 04:21 PM	#1
girlmagik Newcomer Join Date: Jul 2006 Posts: 3	ALL ALONE AND IN LOVE WITH A HEROIN ADDICT HELLO, my name is Robin and im in love with a heroin addict. Its been one whole month of knowing, and ive been miserable ever since. He claims he loves me and he wants to stop, but yet im sitting in the house because he has taken my car and has been gone now for over 48hrs. Im fighting with my sister over reporting my car stolen, but i keep holding onto that false hope that he will return and everything will be ok I dont know how to deal with this, he entered a detox program and left after 4days, im not an addict, but i know that is not long enough. I love him, i do, so much, but im not healthy with him, im jeopardizing my job, my family doesnt talk to me, im losing my friends, and most of all i feel like ive lost him, help! i dont know what to do.

07-23-2006, 05:34 AM	#5
janbear willing servant Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Oklahoma Posts: 14,184	Hi Robin, Welcome to CyberRecovery. Please make yourself at home here and look around the board. Like others suggested you might check out going to Alanon or Naranon meetings in your area, but please continue to come here and share with us. __________________ And this above all, to thine own self be true. And it must follow as night the day, thou canst not be false to any man. -Shakespeare For as he thinks in his heart, so is he. Proverbs 23:7

07-23-2006, 11:15 AM	#6
Prescott Moderator Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Prescott AZ Posts: 3,196	Hi Robin, Welcome to our group. Look forward to getting to know you. Keep coming back. __________________ "Keep it simple" Love in recovery...John

07-23-2006, 04:50 PM	#7
free2bunme Member Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Atlanta, Georgia Posts: 1,542	Welcome Robin! So glad that you are here. Good for you for reaching out for help. If you are going to be in a relationship with a using addict, you are wise to find out as much about addiction as you can, so that you can make an informed decision about what the best thing to do for yourself is. Others have suggested al-anon or nar-anon meetings. I echo that ... think it is a great idea. One, you will get the support you need and will have a fellowship with other people in similar situations. Two, you will get the information you need about how addiction works. Unfortunately, only your boyfriend can make the decision to stop using heroin -- you can't make him, much as you would like to think you can. Keep coming back and sharing. Praying for you. Love, Frannie, clean addict since 8/20/05 __________________ The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing you will make one. Elbert Hubbard It takes courage to grow up and turn out to be who you really are. e.e. cummings When sleeping women wake, mountains move. Chinese Proverb Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go. T.S. Eliot Let nothing upset you, Let nothing frighten you. Everything is changing; God alone is changeless. Patience attains the goal. Who has God lacks nothing; God alone fills all needs. Saint Teresa of Avila

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07-22-2006, 06:40 PM	#2
Doraine Trusted Servant Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Lansford, PA Posts: 1,308	Hi Robin and welcome. It sounds like your life has become unmanageable due your involvement with an addict. Check out Alanon or Naranon. You can get help from women who have been where you are. My ex-husband abused drugs and alcohol. I made the decision to divorce after I went to Alanon. The addict has to want help you can't get anyone clean. You're powerless over his addiction.No one could get me sober either I had to want help. Now I'm sober awhile but it took a long time before I asked for help. Good luck.

07-23-2006, 12:48 AM	#3
zoomie Moderator Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 2,205	Just wanted to say hi and welcome. I'm so sorry your going through all that you are going through. There are good suggestions up above. (((((((((Huggys))))))))

07-23-2006, 04:02 AM	#4
girlmagik Newcomer Join Date: Jul 2006 Posts: 3	thank you so much to all who have replied, your thoughts and suggestions are much appreciated. I look forward to many more conversations here.

07-24-2006, 08:36 AM	#8
admin Member Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 28,249	Hi Robin, You are not alone anymore. Glad to have you join us here. We also have a forum on the board here for Families and Friends Of Alcoholics/Addicts - feel free to check that out when you get a chance. Please feel free to also continue to come here and share with us. We are here for you. Love, Tammy

07-24-2006, 12:49 PM	#9
DonnyB Regular Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Upstate NY Posts: 20	Greetings Robin- Hang in there. I think people have given you good advise. The one piece that I would repeat over and over again would be to attend an alanon meeting. I think you will feel wonderfully supported and get some help sorting things out. Keep coming back here, there is a lot of support and the people are incredibly caring and helpful. Best of luck! Donny B