Some Questions To Ask Ourselves About The 12 Steps

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bluidkiti
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Age: 44
Joined: 01 Dec 2005
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Posted: Tue Dec 06, 2005 5:00 am Post subject: Some Questions To Ask Ourselves About The 12 Steps

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SOME QUESTIONS TO ASK OURSELVES
ABOUT OUR TWELVE STEPS
STEP ONE
We admitted we were powerless over alcohol--that
our lives had become unmanageable.
Am I willing to carry this acceptance a step further and admit I am
powerless over anyone but myself?
Can I realize that my trying to change anyone brings resistance in the
form of hostility or hidden resentment?
I will remind myself, hour after hour each day, that I am powerless over
anyone else, that I can live no life but my own. Changing myself for the
better is the only way I can find peace and serenity. I will remind myself
that a change in my attitude can smooth out many difficulties.
STEP TWO
Came to believe that a Power greater than
ourselves could restore us to sanity.
Can I accept the fact that, with my own human powers, I am not able to
handle everything competently and wisely? Or do I still think that I am
capable of making right decisions about everything?
Can I "come to believe" that I do need help in straightening out my
thinking and developing a rational frame of mind?
I accept the fact that I need help in being restored to sanity, and that I
cannot achieve this without help.
STEP THREE
Made a decision to turn our will and our lives
over to the care of God as we understood Him.
Am I ready to make this decision to let go, and let God take a hand in
managing my life?
Am I ready to keep hands off situations created by others, no matter
what happens?
Or will I still try to intercept each problem, and try to handle it
myself?
Do I understand that I am turning over to the care of God only my own
life and will, only my own problem--nobody else's?
Can I resolve not to "play God" in relation to anyone else, but allow
others to work our their own salvation, just as I am trying to work out
mine?
Will I guard against the tendency to let my self will take over again,
allowing my old patterns of thought and action to bring confusion and
despair back into my daily life?
Will I try to express God's will in all my actions and words toward
others?
I have done my best and it isn't good enough. Now I know I need the help of
a Power greater than my own. I know that help is waiting only for my
acceptance, waiting for me to say, "Not my will but Thine be done." Once I
decided to turn my life and my will over to "God as I understand Him," I
know I must empty my mind and my feelings of fear of what may happen, of the
shame and embarrassment over the behavior of others. In everything I do, I
will try to reflect the light and the wisdom that will come to me through my
surrender to my Higher Power.
STEP FOUR
Made a searching and fearless
moral inventory of ourselves.
Have I allowed myself to harbor resentment?
Am I a victim of self pity, increasing the agony by magnifying it in my
mind?
Do I criticize and condemn?
Do I dedicate myself to the job that is mine--my self-development?
Do I feel compelled to assume responsibilities that belong to another
person?
Do I punish and retaliate for real or imagined hurts?
Do I give in to despair, to a hopeless, "What's the use?" attitude?
Do I allow my mind to dwell on another's shortcomings instead of my
own?
Day by day I will try to overcome my own faults and mistakes, knowing that
this course of thinking, acting and speaking alone can work toward a
solution of my problems.
STEP FIVE
Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human
being the exact nature of our wrongs.
Do I see the importance of admitting my faults, privately to God in my
meditation and prayer and openly to another person whom I respect and trust
to keep my confidences?
Knowing that on one is perfect, can I concede that I am not perfect
either?
Do I realize that the use of this Step will help me to recognize and
deal with my own shortcomings?
Isn't this Step essential for my improvement, since I know that
admitting my shortcomings only to myself would soon leave me open to
excusing them and doing nothing constructive about them?
Do I understand the healing relief of honest acknowledgment of faults?
When I concentrate on my personal progress, the difficulties over which I
have no control will iron themselves out.
STEP SIX
Were entirely ready to have God remove
all these defects of character.
Can I see that character defects are most easily removed by replacing
them with healthy, constructive traits and actions?
Do I realize that God does not remove a fault to produce a vacuum, but
to make room for one of His ideas: love, kindness, tolerance?
Wouldn't I like myself better if I switched off critical thoughts of
something somebody did and replaced them with admiration for something nice
about that person?
Do I know in my innermost heart that I could accept the good God has
available for me if I were not propelled into resistance by may own
self-will?
Do I now that the words "entirely ready" mean my own complete surrender
to God's will?
Do I realize that such surrender is not weakness, but strength that
will reinforce my courage and confidence?
In the humility of surrender we find ourselves. We become able to see our
God-given good qualities, too. All progress must grow from a seed of
self-appreciation which is as far removed from conceit and pride as day is
from night. Let me realize too, that self-doubt and self-hate are defects
of character that hinder my growth.
STEP SEVEN
Humble asked Him to remove our shortcomings?
Am I really ready to have my shortcomings removed?
Or do I cling to some of my favorite ones, those I think are justified
by circumstances?
Do I know they cannot be removed until I am ready, that while I have
any secret reservations, or even unrealized ones, I cannot be ready to be
helped toward my goal of a full, serene life?
Have I reached a point of being truly humble?
Is it only my mind that is ready, or do I ardently wish, from my heart,
to be taught how to live in the light?
Quiet and meek as the tone of this Step appears, do I recognize it as
an instrument of stupendous power to change my life?
How soon will I learn to put it to my use?
Humility is basically a realization of our relationship to our Higher Power.
STEP EIGHT
Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and
became willing to make amends to them all.
As I review the injustices I have done to others, do I see a
significant pattern that indicated a character flaw I ought to try to
correct? A tendency to gossip, to criticize? A habit of taking offense
readily and causing dissension? A quick temper that makes words erupt
without my thinking of the effect they will have?
Do I see this Step as a statement of my responsibility, a suggestion
that I have now become strong enough to make restitution for what I have
done to others?
Shouldn't I regard it as an opportunity to make good, to unburden
myself of whatever lingering feelings of guilt may still be troubling me?
Am I eager to hold up my head and say, "I have fulfilled my
obligations?"
When willingness to make amends can mean so much to me, to my peace of
mind, why do I hesitate?
Let me remind myself, "I am willing to make amends," but more than that, I
am willing to learn to be tolerant and generous in my views
about other people, and to consider their feelings and weakness.
STEP NINE
Made direct amends to such people wherever possible,
except when to do so would injure them or others.
How can I make a fresh start unless I acknowledge the actions and words
I regret, and make amends for them in the best way I can?
Do I realize what a basic and wholesome healing it can be for me to
clear the slate of guilt for hurt I have done to others?
Shouldn't I start by making amends to those in my immediate family?
If I have become estranged from friends and relatives, wouldn't not be
a good time to heal these separations by making friendly overtures without
reserve, and without any attempt to fix blame for what occurred?
Wouldn't I reap rich rewards in comfort and peace of mind by humbly
acknowledging whatever wrongs I have done, and making up for them in full?
Before I start making amends, I will make sure there is no lingering residue
of resentment or self-righteousness left in me. Let me remember that the
reason for making amends is to free my own mind of uneasiness; there is no
need to review each matter to see who is at fault.
STEP TEN
Continued to take personal inventory and when we
were wrong promptly admitted it.
Do I review daily the things I have said or done that I wish I hadn't
as well as those I feel good about?
Do I learn from these daily inventories, so that each day is better for
me than the one before?
Do I try to avoid making judgments based only on my own point of view,
which may not be entirely correct?
Do I understand that taking "personal inventory" means only my
inventory, and not that of anyone else?
Do I always remember to include in my personal inventory the things
that are good about me, relishing the thought if a kindness I have done,
help I have given to someone? Of generously excusing another's fault?
Daily vigilance will turn out to be a small price to pay for my peace of
mind. Every day, let me take a quiet time for reflection and review.
STEP ELEVEN
Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contacts with
God as we understood Him, praying only for
knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.
Can I possibly doubt that prayer and meditation can help me?
Do I pray for things, for advantages, for specific working out of my
problems, or simply for the knowledge that the hand of God is guiding me?
Have I discovered that meditation can reveal solutions I hadn't dreamed
of, because in meditating I open my mind to inspiration?
Can I ever say that prayer and meditation do not work because they did
not produce the results I expected?
Do I realize that "knowledge of God's will" comes to us only with our
perfect surrender?
The spiritual exercise suggested by the Eleventh Step is a powerful force
for good in our lives. Let me not ever think I have no time for it. I
would be depriving myself of precious help.
STEP TWELVE
Having a spiritual awakening as the result of these
Steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics,
and to practice these principles in all our affairs.
Do I define a spiritual awakening as the realization of spiritual
values within myself?
Does it mean to me the growth of understanding of my own destiny, which
I alone can fulfill?
Have I expected this awakening to come to me in the form of instant
revelation, and was I disappointed that it did not?
Am I willing to build toward it, watching its gradual growth and
profiting from it each day?
Having become aware that I have something to give to others, will I
carry this light to those in need?
Do I realize that helping others does even more for me than for them?
That "carrying the message" is an obligation I have to myself?
Let me not dilute the effectiveness of the help I can give by letting it
take the form of giving advice. I know I will never have enough insight
into another's life to tell that person what it is best to do.

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