20 Ways To Tell If You May Have A Drinking Problem

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Don't take them too seriously, but here are some
indications that you just
might have a drinking problem...


20. You have awakened with an over whelming feeling
that you should go back
and apologize... but you don't remember where.
19. The Tipsy Taxi service has banned you from all
its vehicles.

18. You refer to your favorite song only by its
jukebox selection numbers,
G-12.

17. People consider your spouse a Saint for reasons
that totally escape you.

16. Your least favorite song: "Goodnight,
Sweetheart."

15. The last time you had a legal driver's license,
so did Ted Kennedy.

14. You bought your current pick-up truck because it
has a cool place to
hide a six pack.

13. Your last public sing-along experience included
the entire Changes in
Latitutes album.

12. "But Officer, it's been a long time since I
tried to say my ABC's!"

11. You have considered starting a local chapter of
DAMM, Drunks Against Mad
Mothers.

10. All of your old friends are now members of
12-step groups.

9. The 911 dispatcher no longer has to ask your wife
for the address.

8. You think the nutritional information on the back
of a beer can is proof
that you should be able to buy it with food stamps.

7. The only hymn to which you remember all the words
was written by Hank
Williams, Sr.

6. "Screw dinner!"

5. You know for certain that putting your foot on
the floor does not stop
the room from spinning.

4.Your insurance agent drops by and mentions your
policy does cover
treatment centers.

3. You know the punch line to "Why does an Al-Anoner
close her eyes to make
love?".

2. The producers of the television program "Cops"
still send you Christmas
cards.


And the Number One way you can tell if you have a
drinking problem...

1. Two words: Commode Huggin'.
Author Unknown