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| Adult Children Of Alcoholics A place for adult children of alcoholics to share with each other and receive help/support. |
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#1 |
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Moderator
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Lancaster CA
Posts: 1,770
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Styles of distored thinking............
Styles of Distorted Thinking
by Adult Children Anonymous Filtering: You take the negative details and magnify them while filtering out all positive aspects of the situation. Polarized Thinking: Things are black or white, good or bad. You have to be perfect or you are a failure. There is no middle ground. Over Generalization: You come to a general conclusion based on a single incident or other piece of evidence. If something bad happens once, you expect it to happen over and over again. Mind Reading: Without their saying so, you know what people are feeling and why they act the way they do. In particular, you are able to tell how people are feeling about you. Catastrophizing: You expect a disaster. You notice or hear about a problem and start, "What if's?" What if a tragedy strikes? What if it happens to you? Personalization: You think everything people do or say is some kind of a reaction to you. You also compare yourself to others, trying to determine who's smarter, better looking, etc. Control Fallacies: You feel externally controlled, you see yourself as helpless, a victim of fate. The fallacy of internal control makes you feel responsible for the pain or happiness of everyone around you. Fallacy of Fairness: You feel resentful because you think you know what's fair but are sure that other people won't agree with you. Blaming: You hold others responsible for your pain, or else you blame yourself for every problem or reversal. Shoulds: You have a list of ironclad rules about how you and other people should act or feel. People who break these rules anger you and you feel guilty if you violate them yourself. Emotional Reasoning: You believe that what you feel must be true automatically. If you feel stupid or boring, then you must be stupid or boring. Fallacy of Change: You expect that others will change to suit you if you just pressure or cajole them enough. You need to change people because your hopes and happiness seems to depend on them. Global Labeling: You generalize one or two qualities into a negative judgment. When you make a mistake, instead of describing your error, you say: "I'm a loser." If someone irritates you, you label them, "He's a louse." Being Right: You are continually on trial to prove your opinions and actions are correct. Heaven's Reward: You expect all of your sacrifices and self-denial to pay off, as if there were someone keeping score. 1. Self Pity 11. Impatience 2. Self Justification 12. Resentment 3. Self Importance 13. Hate 4. Self Condemnation 14. Enviousness 5. Criticizing 15. Jealousy 6. Negative Thinking 16. Laziness 7. Vulgar Immoral Thinking 17. Lying 8. Insensitivity 18. Gossiping 9. Procrastination 19. Selfishness 10. Dishonesty 20. Fear
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#2 |
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Regular
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Sunny New Mexico
Posts: 11
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Styles of distored thinking............
thanks for that reminder of distored thinking. There are quite a few I need to brush up on!
Pat
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Simple things make me happy! ![]() "Do not argue for your weaknesses, or you will make them yours." Stephen Covey, author. |
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#3 |
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fibiray
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: central coast nsw australia
Posts: 875
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To be perfectly honest with you I think I need work in just about of that has been mentioned (eeeek/cringe) The over generalisation I find is a confusing one because as an alcoholic and being a person who takes things to extremes, I keep going back to what is not good for me, expecting a different result each time. The only thing is that it works in reverse. I know that a thing may be bad but keep insisting on inflicting myself with it. Work that one out eh. this was certainly the case for my drinking and in regards to people places and situations. thanks for letting me share
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